


What a Tangled Web

by Megabucks



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Crime, Death, Drama, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Family, Friendship, LGBT, Lesbian, Love, Swan Queen Supernova 2019 (Once Upon a Time), Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-10-13 18:47:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 66,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20587292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megabucks/pseuds/Megabucks
Summary: Emma Swan, an ex-drug dealer and past leader of the Jersey Devils has just been released from prison after serving ten years. Unbeknownst to her the house she rented is right next to Regina Mills. She doesn't know her, but ten years ago she did form a bond with her now deceased son. Blaming herself for his death, Emma struggles with that along with a growing attraction to her neighbor who is none the wiser.





	1. Hell Yes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Alternate8reality](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alternate8reality/gifts).
  * Inspired by [What a Tangled Web [Art]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20492798) by [swensundayshow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/swensundayshow/pseuds/swensundayshow). 

> I would like to dedicate this book to Chris, who not only encouraged me to finish this, who not only is my awesome editor but the love of my life. You brighten my day, you brighten my world 💜
> 
> *****
> 
> Luce, again I thank you so much for the amazing artwork. Put it side by side with my Google doc for inspiration to finish this thing. You rock!
> 
> *****
> 
> ***This story contains instances of graphic violence and subject matter that could be triggering (reference to rape and attempted suicide)

Smooth, flat and cool to the touch her thumb continuously brushed across a bluish surface speckled with tiny white dots while she looked toward the youth settled beside her chattering away. He held a similar object, which he tossed from one hand to the other, lips furiously moving as he jumped from one topic to another, something that wasn't unusual for him. It could be vertiginous maintaining a conversation with Henry, but over the last ten months she had known him, she adapted.

"Hey, Emma?" he inquired in a suddenly softened voice while staring toward the small rock resting in the middle of his palm.

"Yeah, kid?" She congratulated him with a light shoulder bump seconds after the rock expertly skipped along the lake's surface just like she had taught him to do over the summer. A warmth washed over her as those deep brown eyes settled on her; that contagious lopsided grin she had grown to love lifting the corners of her own mouth. She felt a strong urge to reach out and ruffle his hair, but knew if she did so she would promptly be reminded that he was fifteen (almost sixteen)-_way_ too old for such antics-and that it had taken him nearly fifteen minutes to arrange every strand precisely the way he preferred.

"You ready?"

Emma's brow furrowed then she glanced toward her yet to be thrown rock. "To pitch this?" She held it up, furrow deepening when he shook his head. "For what?"

"The next chapter of your life."

A small chuckle leaked out. Was her young friend getting philosophical on her? "What's it called?"

Somehow Henry managed not to squint as he peered upward directly into the rising sun, expression filled with reflection. "Unexpected You."

Suddenly Emma couldn't take her eyes off him, like she thought if she so much as blinked he would vanish. A sudden ache settled into her chest as her heart began furiously thumping and for a moment she wondered if she might be on the cusp of a heart attack. Drawing in a deep breath in an effort to slow her pulse she did her best to ignore the uncomfortable feeling and cleared her throat. "Who is you?" Emma's heart began to settle when those dark eyes reconnected with her own, a mysterious smile slipping onto his lips, yet they failed to part in order to offer a response**.** Emma repeated her inquiry only to have Henry whisper something that didn't clear things up in the least bit.

"That's for you to find out."

She groaned, fingers curling around the chilled rock. "Henry..."

"Swan."

She frowned. Since when did he refer to her by her last name? And how was he achieving it without his lips moving?

"Swan!"

"SWAN!"

Sleep filled eyes slitted open attempting to focus with much confusion toward the flat, grey ceiling until a feminine voice shouted their surname, prompting a blond head to turn toward the middle aged woman, dressed in a dark blue uniform, standing just inside a heavy metal door. Thumbs hooked into the sides of the duty belt wrapped around a thickened waist the woman cocked an eyebrow, a voice rough from years of cigarette practice inquiring if Emma was ready.

Although the question reminded Emma of her dream, she did her best to push it away. Couldn't think about him right now. Already had a lump in her throat. Cot creaking as she shifted into a seated position, long fingers threaded through her hair pushing it out of her face. A bit of sleep rubbed from her eyes she blinked several times before focusing on the guard. "For what, Rolands?"

Employed in the women's prison the last fourteen years Rolands had long ago perfected a "don't screw with me" expression. However, that usual hard facade melted into a broad grin as she regarded one of her all-time favorite inmates. "To get the hell outta this shithole."

A matching grin worn, Emma unleashed a low chuckle as she stood up, then took a couple seconds to stretch. Their eyes meeting she nodded. That was a simple enough question to answer. After spending a decade of her life there was she ready to snatch back her freedom? "Oh hell yes, Rolands." The grin impossibly widened. "Hell yes."

*********

Casually leaned against the sports car with arms folded against a generous chest, a beam appeared the moment she spotted the blonde standing inside a just opened door, arms wrapped around a guard. She didn't push away from the car until the strutting blonde with a duffle bag slung over her shoulder was within earshot.

"Look out world," a grin flashing, she opened her arms in preparation, "Emma Swan is back on the scene." Duffel bag dropped with a thump, she shut her eyes to savor the second strong arms surrounded her. Nose buried in soft golden locks she released a little moan as they clung to one another. God she had missed this woman more than she was capable of putting into words.

So she surprised them both when immediately after the embrace ended she attempted to slap the taste from Emma's mouth.

Hand reaching up to cup a stinging cheek, widened green eyes stared with a mixture of shock and anger. "What the fuck, Ruby?"

Her own cheeks reddening Ruby dared to shake a finger in the other woman's face. "That's for restricting how often I could visit you. Just once on your birthday is ridiculous!" No matter how much she begged over phone calls and through letters sent to the penitentiary Emma would never relent.

When Emma murmured something that sounded like an apology, Ruby pulled in a deep breath, reached out to squeeze her shoulder and issued her own for lashing out. That was the past. They had Emma's future to focus on now.

"You ready to get out of here, Em?" A nod received, she glanced toward the discarded duffel. "Is that all you have after ten years?"

"Yeah, I decided to give the bedroom set, leather couches, flat screens and kitchen appliances to my cell buds," Emma dryly responded.

Ruby smirked and reached to grab the duffel. "Cute. I've _so_ missed your sarcasm." A grin appearing upon detecting Emma's chuckle she tossed the duffel into the trunk then indicated for the woman to get in the passenger side. Once settled behind the wheel she asked Emma what she would like to eat. Anywhere she wanted to go for her just got out of prison meal was fine as it was Ruby's treat.

Fingers drumming along the bottom of the steering wheel Ruby sent her a beam. "A big juicy steak? Lobster? The sky's the limit."

Emma spent all of five seconds pondering her first freedom meal. "McDonalds." Her friend's face screwed up like she had just told her she wanted to dine on snail soup caused Emma to laugh. "Seriously, that's what I want. I am seriously jonesing for the privilege of sinking my teeth into a Big Mac and a heap of fries."

Ruby stared at her until she felt the need to blink. "Of all things...okay, if you really want a burger for your first meal I know of several delicious, quality burger joints between here and our ninety mile ride to your new home."

Emma shook her head. "McDonalds please."

"You're making my heart hurt, Emma."

She laughed again. "Must. Have. McNuggets."

"Nuggets? I thought you wanted a burger?" Emma shrugged. "Both. You want both?" Ruby groaned the moment her friend nodded. "Dear God, you eat like that every day and you'll need bypass surgery." She sighed as though this were the largest dilemma of all time. "Could take you to Granny's house. She'd be happy to both see you and fry up some chicken. Remember how juicy and crunchy it was?"

Emma nodded. In general Granny's food had been amazing. She was pretty certain every time the woman fed her she gained at least a half pound, which was why she thought it wise not to go over there several times per week. "I remember and I'd love to sink my teeth into one of Granny's breasts-"

"Ew." This time Ruby's face screwed up like someone had just shoved a couple lemon wedges into her mouth. "Please never _ever _say it like that again."

Another nod while Emma bit back a laugh. "Sorry. That was unintentional. Listen," she paused, "I'd love some homemade chicken later this week, but today I want McDonalds."

Ruby incredulously stared. "That's really what you want?"

"Haven't had it in ten years."

"A lot of things you haven't had…"

"Okay. So," Emma clapped palms along jean covered thighs, "let's start with a Big Mac. That would make me very happy."

A smile blooming upon her face Ruby reached over to gently cup and caress a cheek. "If a Big Mac will secure your happiness," she ever so softly spoke, "then that's what you'll get because, Emma, your happiness means the world to me."

Expression initially unreadable Emma then blinked, a grin curving her lips. "Dude, you're so gay." She laughed when a tight fist punched her upper arm.

*********

A small brown bag atop her lap holding the two apple pies she ordered, yet had been too stuffed to eat, Emma observed the cute little one story house as her friend pulled into its driveway. Emma was surprised it didn't have a white picket fence and a dog awaiting their arrival on the front porch. Asked what she thought about it since she had only been given a couple photos a few weeks prior Emma nodded, a smile forming right after as she unbuckled her seatbelt. Hand upon the latch to open the door she turned toward Ruby.

"I like it so far." Years ago she asked Ruby, the person she trusted most in the world to tuck her money away. Upon learning she would be released, she contacted Ruby to use some of those funds to find and rent her a house stipulating that it have at least two bedrooms, a decent-sized backyard and garage.

Ruby returned that smile. "The backyard is actually so big you could put an impressive pool out there." She could have smacked herself the moment the blonde stiffened, fingers curling and tightening around the latch. Hesitantly reaching toward the nearest thigh Ruby covered and squeezed, an apology murmured.

"It's okay." Emma flashed a smile laced with tension. "I shouldn't be so…" She sighed and shook her head as though trying to clear it. "Let's go check out my new pad." Although she heard the soft utterance of her name she hurriedly pushed the door open, grabbed her apple pie bag and climbed out.

*********

"I really do love this place, Ruby," she said, pleased eyes traveling around the fully furnished living room. Emma had expected the rental to be empty but her friend had kept a lot of her possessions and what she hadn't kept she bought new, needing to spend the better part of an hour convincing the stubborn woman they were congratulations you're out of prison, housewarming, and ten years worth of birthday and Christmas presents-including the fifty-five inch flat screen television in the den. As for the smaller one in the master bedroom? That had been found in Ruby's garage-one she hadn't used in a couple years. No, she wasn't lying.

"I'm glad." Both seated on the couch with a cushion between them Ruby lifted her glass. "I'd like to propose a toast to our friendship reunification and new beginnings."

"I'll drink to that." A light tap of her goblet against Ruby's she brought it to her lips and took a sip from her first glass of wine in a decade. "Have you seen any of the old crew? In contact with any of them?"

Ruby shook her head. "Mostly scattered. Jersey Devils started falling apart soon after you were arrested." A smile bloomed. "I do keep in touch with Belle though."

Emma laughed. "Little Chimney. How is she?"

"Actually, that's ex Little Chimney. She hasn't lit up a cigarette since her first pregnancy."

"She has kids?"

A mouthful of wine swallowed and Ruby nodded. "Married with four of them."

"Wow. Can't picture her as a mom."

"Yeah, but she's actually great at it. On the PTA and everything."

Emma shook her head as though in a fog. Following a few seconds worth of silence she looked toward her friend who sat upon the couch while she herself occupied a recliner. "So what about you?"

"What about me?"

"Kids?" Although a glance toward a slender ring finger offered her a hint she added, "Wife?"

Ruby laughed as though she had just been told the most hilarious joke. "Uh, neither of the above. Playing Aunt Ruby to Belle's rugrats is enough for me."

"As for the lack of a wife?" Emma studied her while bringing the glass to her lips.

Voice soft Ruby replied, "Maybe I've been waiting for you." A wide-eyed stare caused her to laugh once more. "Damn, Em, you look like I just told you I'm pregnant and the baby is yours."

"Ha." A fleeting smirk and Emma drained the remainder of her wine before reaching for the dark green bottle to refill. The red liquid slowly poured into the glass while a memory pushed to the forefront of her brain without her consent.

So fragile, so unusually weak. She and Ruby in the shower. Last kisses, last intimate touches she had with anyone. Asked what she was thinking Emma shook her head, murmuring about it being nothing though she was aware of the sudden heat staining her cheeks.

"Hey," glass placed upon the coffee table Ruby leaned forward with elbows planted on her thighs and fingers linked, "talk to me." When Emma merely pulled in a deep breath and looked toward her lap as though it fascinated her Ruby stood up, moved around the coffee table and knelt in front of her, sandwiching hands with a slight tremble. Encouraging Emma to focus on her; once she obeyed Ruby tenderly smiled. "You can talk to me, you know? Just because I've only seen you about a dozen times over the last decade doesn't erase the fact you're my best friend."

A tongue darted across dried lips while Emma forced herself to maintain eye contact. "That night," she whispered. "You and I after...it happened."

Ruby's lips formed a perfect O then seconds later an 'oh' pushed from them. She too remembered that night. Vividly. Perhaps too much. Though so many years had gone by she recalled the events of that night like they took place just last week.

.

_The label cleanly pulled from the beer bottle, she dropped it upon the other two then polished off the bitter contents, bottle soundlessly dropped on the table. The hundredth sigh released she studied the woman leaning against a wall next to the window that afforded a minimal view of the side of the house. About to pull another cigarette from a crumpled pack, fingers paused when her name was uttered._

"_Why don't you head on home, Belle?" Usually Ruby referred to her as Little Chimney or LC for short, but tonight didn't feel like a nickname night. Using the name printed on her birth certificate seemed much more appropriate. Haunted eyes gazing back at her, with a healthy dose of hesitation Ruby swallowed the distance between them, shoved the cigarettes into the smaller woman's jacket pocket then pulled her into a tight embrace. "It's okay, Belle," she quietly stated though it wasn't okay. It was far from okay. Tonight, five of them had been given a taste of hell, one paying the ultimate price._

_One hand stroked the length of Belle's back. "I'll take care of her. You g'wan home and try to get some sleep."_

_Pushing away from her Belle shook her head. Pack retrieved, she pulled out a cigarette that had seen better days, twirling it between her fingers. "Don't think I wanna sleep tonight. Times like this wish I sampled our products." The filtered tip of the cigarette tucked into the corner of her mouth she peered up into Ruby's face. "I could stay."_

_Ruby managed the tiniest of smiles. "Thanks, but I got her."_

_A nod and Belle stared out the window another couple_ _seconds__,_ _though there wasn't anything to see at that time of night. "Yeah." Another nod. "Probably better with just the two of you. Call me if you need anything."_

"_I will, babe." Another hug and she walked her friend and fellow Jersey Devils member to the front door._

_Less than a minute later, Ruby stood outside the master bedroom Emma disappeared into immediately after the four of them returned to Ruby's house. Not surprised the blonde didn't answer following several knocks a hand curled around the knob, turned and pushed it open. Ruby's heart broke upon spotting Emma seated on the side of her bed staring straight ahead toward a barren section of the wall, hands clutching her knees, golden hair wild, blood staining various parts of her clothing and skin. Eyes she would usually describe as emerald appeared dull as though the life had been zapped from her body. Emma's eyes were wide open yet dazed, unfocused. Ruby doubted she was even aware of her presence._

_Coming to kneel in front of her, she reached up to cup a cheek, her friend failing to react to the contact. Not even a flicker of lashes. She simply remained staring at the wall through puffy, red eyes. Her name whispered, Ruby's thumb brushed back and forth on a cheek marred with a bit of dried blood. Calling her name again while lightly slapping that cheek, Ruby breathed a small sigh of relief the moment Emma blinked and looked toward her. Mentioning that Emma should take a shower she was met with a silent blank stare. Earlier she had screamed and cried and as heartbreaking as that had been Ruby would have preferred that to this broken shell seated before her._

"_Let me help you," she stated in a near whisper, beginning to untie a shoelace. It's sneaker tugged off she then removed the sweat dampened sock before shifting to untie the other shoe. Emma meanwhile had returned her attention to the wall until hands wrapped around her own and pulled until she gathered the strength to stand, saying and doing nothing when fingers began undoing the small buttons upon her shirt._

_Having Emma undressed within a couple minutes Ruby stripped out her own clothing, linked a hand with her friend's and began leading her into the adjoining bathroom. Ascertaining she had enough body wash, shampoo and conditioner she guided Emma inside the walk-in shower, joined her and closed the shower curtain._

_While dampening her hair Ruby kept eyeing her waiting for Emma to say something, yet her lips remained firmly shut. It was while working shampoo into her hair that those lips did finally part and headed straight to hers. For a moment Ruby returned the kiss then common sense delivered a solid smack to the back of her head. Drawing back with fingers remaining buried in blond locks she searched Emma's eyes not at all certain what she saw._

"_Em-"_

"_Please," the unusually quiet woman started in a hoarse voice, "need to feel something other than the pain. Please, Rubes."_

_She had her at the very first please. That was all it took. Ruby wouldn't even bother denying the fact it wasn't in her vocabulary to say no to Emma. She would walk over searing coals barefoot if the woman made such a suggestion._

_Their lips met, arms and hands clinging to one another. It wasn't a gentle kiss nor one filled with passion. Basically a combination of desperation and need, tongues thrashing, teeth nipping enough to cause some pain but at least this was a different type. A welcome pain._

_Before long Ruby pulled back then proceeded to taste the length of Emma's strong, sinewy body, fingers digging into her damp scalp the moment an exploring tongue flicked a hardening clit. One leg guided over her shoulder she glanced up to Emma to notice her head thrown back against the tiled_ _wall, eyes shut, her expression indiscernible. Returning to her task her tongue bathed and sucked until the fingers within her hair began to tug prompting her to explore deeper._

_She could feel her clenching around her stiffened tongue, fingers now manipulating that swollen nub. Just as Ruby expected it wouldn't be long the moans died down, then ceased all together followed by one amplifying gasp after another. She looked up and even with the showerhead raining upon them could decipher those falling tears. Another crack added to her heart Ruby carefully rose to her feet just in time to catch the bawling woman, strong arms wrapped around her, a face tucked into the side of her neck, hot tears causing further dampness._

_Ruby held her tighter than she had anyone in her life, soothing palms stroking the length of her back, lips parting to assure her friend that she was there and that she had her. At some point they collapsed to the floor, embrace persisting despite the spray having turned cold._

_._

"So how many women in prison did you…" Although it tasted good the wine wasn't all that interesting to look at, but that didn't prevent Ruby from staring at it as she awaited an answer to her trailed off inquiry. She felt eyes upon her but for the time being refused to glance toward her couch companion.

"Did I what?"

"You know." Ruby waved one hand back and forth.

"Slap?"

Laughing, Ruby finally made eye contact noticing a hint of mirth. "Fuck."

An eyebrow lifted. "Damn, Ruby. So crass!"

She rolled her eyes. "Made love to then."

A frown surpassed the amusement. "I have never in my life made love to a woman." Emma's tone of voice would lead one to believe that the very idea of making love caused her a great deal of disturbance.

"Pardon me." Ruby felt the need to roll her eyes again. "Sex."

"I'm female. Wait," a finger held up Emma then pulled her shirt outward, peered below then gave a perfunctory nod, "yep, not the biggest rack but definitely female."

"I'm going to beat you on your first day out of prison."

"How is it _I_ just got released and _you're_ the violent one?"

"Emma…"

With the speed of a flicked switch Emma's amusement vanished, a sigh pushed from her lips. "You're the last woman I was intimate with," she softly admitted.

It was Ruby's turn to lift a brow except both shifted upward. "Have those women in prison television shows and movies been lying to me all these years?"

A smile flashed. "Prison mating isn't a myth. I just decided not to partake."

"Why? Ten years is a long time without...you know... And you weren't...shy about it before."

Polishing off the contents of her glass Emma placed it upon the coffee table and smirked. "I think you just subtly called me a ho."

"No! No, I just-"

Laughing, Emma held up a hand. "It's okay. I'm kidding." She glanced toward the clock hanging on the wall next to the kitchen. "It's getting late. You should be on your way."

"Putting me out?"

"No, I just don't want you to get on the road when it's pitch black."

"I'm not eighty years old, Emma. I can see. Plus, I only live twelve miles away." It didn't matter though. She stopped arguing as the blonde stood up and offered her a hand. Goblet placed on the table with a low groan Ruby accepted the help up, enjoying when an arm wrapped around her shoulders as they headed toward the front door. "Call you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, but also call me when you get home."

Ruby released a pleased smile. She may have been kicking her out but at least she cared. Following a tight embrace and a kiss on the cheek Ruby walked out, turning around on the basic black welcome mat with the word welcome printed in gold lettering. She eyed an adorable one with a trio of kittens playing in a field of colorful flowers but knew upon seeing it Emma would present her with a 'you've got to be kidding me' expression. "You're gonna be okay here by yourself? Your first night?"

The only time during her incarceration Emma spent alone were the weeks she spent in the Hole. Other than that, even when someone moved out her cell, whether they were being relocated or headed home, another roommate would swiftly come along. She felt more than ready to be by herself. To sleep in a comfortable bed and have the television on passed ten o'clock.

Emma nodded, a small smile emerging. "I'm good, Rubes."

*********

Twisting and turning. She was so very tired of it. A groan joining the night air, Emma glanced toward the bedside clock, bright red numbers seemingly teasing her. Almost a quarter to four and she may have slept a collective hour since retiring to bed around eleven.

So much for the pleasures of being alone. It was too quiet. No roommate snoring, no roommate talking in her sleep, no roommate getting up to pee every hour, no roommate listening to her radio with the volume low enough for just the two of them to hear. Much too quiet. Preferring the bottom bunk, Emma missed having someone above her.

Rolling onto her back she studied the ceiling once her eyes adjusted with the thin stream of light peeking through the blinds. Fingers linked upon her stomach she twiddled her thumbs while her mind raced a hundred miles per hour, the main thought focusing on the fact it was too damn quiet in her new house. Maybe she should've rented an apartment instead. At least then she could have neighbors on either side of her and above.

Thumbs coming to a halt Emma sighed then emitted a whispered, "Shit."

"Trouble sleeping, Emma?"

Heart almost leaping from her chest the blonde sprang into a seated position, covers pooled around her waist, eyes darting around the room until she spotted the petite redhead seated in a wooden rocking chair in the corner of the room, a bundle in her arms. Hold on. There hadn't been a rocking chair in this room.

_Really? We're going to focus on the furniture right now? _Emma wanted to smack herself. The materializing chair was the least of her problems when the person occupying it was supposed to be dead. That heart attempted to jump from her chest once again when a tiny fist thrust from the small blanket the woman held. A baby. Her own fists clenched the bedspread, Emma stared at them, vocal chords unable to produce a sound. It didn't make any sense. This had to be a dream. It figured she had fallen asleep only to trap herself in a nightmare.

"Does the cat have your tongue, Emma?" A faint smile appeared as she began to slowly rock back and forth, the fist within the blanket lowering until out of Emma's sight.

"Why?" she finally managed to whisper.

"Why what?"

Emma wanted to get up yet her body seemed frozen to the bed, limbs locked. "Why are you here?"

Head cocked to one side the redhead curiously studied her. "Shouldn't you be asking yourself that?" When almost a full minute passed by without Emma responding she sighed, sadness covering her features. "When are you going to stop punishing yourself? You can't change the past, so just deal with it and move on, Emma." The baby beginning to sound fussy prompted her to rock faster.

Startled green eyes shifted to the bundle. "You have a baby."

"I was pregnant."

"I know," Emma whispered. "I'm sorry. So sorry." No longer able to look at them her gaze lowered to the covers.

"It's okay, sugar." A trace of a southern accent leaked through at that point. "You didn't do this."

Emma closed her eyes for a second, shaking her head in both confusion and a half-hearted attempt to wake herself up. _This?_ The answer to her internal question discovered the moment she reopened her eyes spotting the redhead standing just a couple feet away, the baby in her arms having disappeared. She stood dressed in jeans and a pullover, blood encrusted and mud stained fabric clinging to her small frame, twigs and leaves stuck in disheveled crimson locks. Despite her appearance she managed another faint smile.

"You just let them get rid of me like garbage." She paused, that smile persisting. "Then you tossed him too."

Awakening on her stomach with her face half pressed into the pillow and arms locked around it, Emma lifted her head, throwing the covers off her overheated body. A moment later, seated on the side of the bed, bare feet pressed to the carpeted floor, she glanced around the room, paying extra special attention to that corner, which was thankfully empty. Breathing fast for someone who had just emerged from slumber she shook the edge of her T-shirt allowing cool air to reach sweat dampened skin.

Four thirty-two. She groaned then frowned toward the bed as though her lack of sleep was its fault. "Fuck, sleep." Emma couldn't sleep now. She didn't even want to try concerned the dream would return. Another groan and she stood up, stretched and headed toward the bathroom for a shower.

Feeling ten percent better following a shower Emma threw on a pair of sweatpants and a fresh T-shirt then spent the next twenty minutes figuring out how to use the coffee maker Ruby had gifted her. She had a coffee maker before she went in. It had been simple to use with just one button to operate. This thing, she wouldn't be surprised if it started talking to her.

Apple pies from the previous evening warmed up in the microwave, Emma munched on one in between sips of coffee as she stood in her garage. A nice size indeed. Plenty of space for equipment and for her to work. She couldn't wait to purchase her equipment so she could have something positive to focus on.

No chairs, she sat upon the cold cement floor, back pressed to the wall. Mug brought to her lips she took another swallow followed by another bite of pie. A few minutes later Emma shook her head. She couldn't even hear a cricket chirping.

"Too damn quiet."


	2. Rotten to the Core

"Cygnus!" A small mischievous grin already played on her lips in preparation of what she was about to request and once she had the attention of the blonde seated across from her it doubled in size. "In honor of Lily joining Jersey Devils you should give a speech." She glanced toward the empty pitchers. "And refills on the beer."

Emma smirked. "You think so?"

"About the beer or the speech?" Not that their leader was allergic to talking, but Belle learned long ago she wasn't big on giving formal speeches.

Though the smirk reappeared, scooting her chair back Emma stood up and grabbed the handles of each pitcher then made of point of eyeing every person seated around the large dining table within the busy pizza parlor. "Since you all are obviously a bunch of fuckin' leeches," Emma paused, focusing on their newest member, " and, Lily, you ain't included in that insult since this little shindig is for you, I will buy us more beer." Rolling her eyes in response to excited cheers she turned to leave, not bothering to check who dared slap her ass. Probably Ruby since she sat right next to her.

Joining the short line for alcohol, two minutes later Emma handed the bartender the pitchers along with a few bills including a tip then stepped aside to wait. A small group of teenagers surrounding another frightened looking youth near a pinball machine drew her attention. Brow knit she watched the biggest one use a meaty hand to clutch the back of the frightened boy's head and slam his face into the tempered glass.

Froth topped pitchers placed on the counter in front of her, Emma thanked the bartender, murmured something about being back soon to collect them and hurried toward the group. Throat cleared upon arrival to gain their attention she pulled a smile to her lips though Meaty kept his prey pinned to the arcade game. The moment she softly suggested he release the boy he laughed, telling her to mind her own business, his friends displaying their approval of his behavior through chuckles and grins.

Emma kept smiling. Oh goody. She was a fan of a teaching assholes lessons. Making a lightning fast grab for Meaty's unused arm she shoved it behind his back and pulled until focusing on the pain left him no choice but to release the boy who quickly took several steps backward, one cheek pink from being pressed to the glass. Meaty's greasy mug quickly pressed to the exact same place on the machine as Emma tugged his arm up even further and shoved him down hard. A glance in their direction and Emma realized Meaty's buddies didn't seem too gungho to offer him assistance.

Quickened breaths fogging up the pinball glass followed by a pained moaned prompted Emma to throw a sneer in his direction but release him with an extra shove for good measure before she accidentally snapped his arm. Frightening a teenager was one thing. Actually causing him severe injury resulting in assault charges was another, and this chunky little bully and what was sure to be his upper middle-class parents with a lawyer in their back pocket, just wasn't worth the headache. While he protectively held his arm to his chest Emma shifted toward the bullied youth and threw an arm around his shoulders, sharp eyes sweeping four sets warily watching her.

"Evidently there's a problem between you gentleman and my friend..." she squeezed the shoulder her hand covered while expectantly looking at the boy tucked to her side until he finally understood what she wanted.

"Henry," he softly supplied appearing just as alarmed as the other boys.

Emma nodded, attention returned to Meaty and his group. "So, what's going on? Why you little shits picking on my friend Henry?" When none seemed inclined to offer a response she squeezed Henry once more before releasing him and stepping toward them, pleased when they hurriedly backed up a few steps, sneakers squeaking against a well polished floor. Zero amusement apparent upon her features an eyebrow lifted. "One of you better start talkin'. _Now_."

The skinny, freckle faced member of the group cleared his throat, long fingers drumming along the sides of jeans so baggy they surely would have dropped from slim hips if he hadn't been wearing a belt. "Trash ba-...uh..._Henry's_...a mama's boy."

Emma had expected some kind of mean nickname but hadn't expected that lame an answer and her expression showed it. "Excuse me?"

The string bean shrugged. "We saw him at the mall yesterday with her hanging out." Perhaps he required water because he cleared his throat again. "Loser's only got like one friend…"

"Besides his _mommy_ that is." Meaty chimed in from behind the other three but was silenced quickly with a sneer and another step forward from Emma.

One hand balled at her side. She yearned to punch all four of them in the face. "So," Emma started in a quiet voice, "someone spending quality time with a parent qualifies them to get their ass kicked? The fuck is wrong with you dirtbags?" When Meaty dared to open his mouth for a second time, she instructed him to shut the fuck up, which he immediately did. In fact she was pretty sure all four temporarily stopped breathing the second she took another step, closing the gap to less than a foot.

"Allow me to give you some advice," she kept her voice low yet audible enough for them to hear with surrounding customers, "If you fuck with Henry again you fuck with me, and believe you me, I'm the last bitch you want to be fucking with." Emma flashed them a smile so chilly all four actually shivered. Right hand raised she used her middle digit to scratch at a non-itchy chin, simultaneously providing them with the finger and showing the small blue pitchfork tattoo below her knuckle with the letters J and D inked between its prongs. "Understood, boys?"

They nodded so vigorously she almost laughed. Keeping it contained she focused on Henry, crooking a finger at him to follow her. Once they were a few feet away she pulled him close again as though they were truly friends and headed toward the bar. "Help me with my pitchers, kid, and I'll buy you a root beer float."

Henry eyed the two pitchers they approached. "I could just take a couple sips of that. No big deal."

"Oh yeah? You twenty-one?" Emma laughed watching the hope of a grown up allowing him to sample alcohol melt away.

"Fifteen," he mumbled.

She squeezed him again. "Root beer float it is, kid."

*********

"Em, look!" She waved the packaged drill about while grinning. "It's pink!"

Leaning upon the shopping cart Emma stared like she thought her friend should be fitted for a straightjacket. "I know we've been separated for ten years but when have you ever known me to be a fan of the color pink?"

Lips pushed out Ruby appeared on the cusp of pouting as she looked toward the drill. "I remember your favorite color is blue, but this is so cute! I even saw a basic tools kit on another aisle that would go with it perfectly. A hammer, pliers, screwdri-" She stopped speaking the second Emma straightened from the cart and held up a hand.

"Thanks, Rubes, but I'm not searching for _cute _tools. I want durable, sensible, serious ones that'll help keep me out the ER."

"Pink isn't gonna cut your finger off."

Emma audibly swallowed a groan. Ruby was a good friend. A great friend actually, but today she was being a total pain in the ass. Drivers license having expired while she was incarcerated Emma learned at the DMV she would have to start over. Written test, drivers test and an eye exam. Passing the written test with flying colors that morning she couldn't wait until next week to take her drivers test. The eye exam would be a piece of cake then she could begin driving herself around in the used pickup truck she had already purchased. Her temporary chauffeur meant well but she felt the need to question or comment on just about every purchase Emma made.

"I...don't...want...pink," Emma intentionally enunciated each word, then swallowed again-that time a grin- when Ruby offered a glare. Speaking of cute she had forgotten how adorable she looked when angry.

"You don't have to speak to me like I'm five."

"Oh, I'm not. I'm speaking like you're a senior citizen who is having much difficulty understanding the words coming from my mouth."

With narrowed eyes Ruby returned the package to the stack of pink drills. "Says the person who is three years older than me." She made a point of scanning the length of Emma. "Damn girl, you're thirty-four now. Getting up there. Have you started dyeing your hair yet?" She whistled and shook her head.

Instead of being upset by the reminder Emma simply chuckled. "You're right behind me, Rubes." Not awaiting a response she pointed toward the black drill two spaces away from the cute ladylike one. "Grab that for me will you?"

"It's thirty bucks more!"

Emma stared anew, Ruby staring right back at her. Another point added to the pain in the ass report yet she reiterated Ruby Lucas was a great friend. Despite being a major P.I.T.A. sometimes. Walking away from the cart Emma brushed by Ruby on her way to the shelves of tools. The one she preferred selected she held it up for her friend to see. "One of its attributes is that it's cordless. Cords are a pain in the ass." Headed back to the cart she murmured, "Like you." A swat to her backside caused her to laugh.

*********

Its weight feeling nice upon her palm, Emma smiled with much affection at the pocketknife as she sat upon a stool within her garage, carpentry tools arranged around her upon the walls, tables and shelves. She had a dozen of them, which Ruby had put away for her but this one was by far her favorite because it belonged to her father. A stainless steel blade contained in a rosewood handle, it was engraved E. Swan. The E stood for his name Emmett, but it could've just as easily originally been hers.

Emmett Swan's most beloved hobby was to whittle, which he taught his only child how to do when she was a little one. Ever since Emma held a fascination with turning wood into masterpieces small, big and in between. In prison after months of inquiries and discussions she had been allowed to start a carpentry program teaching a group of inmates how to build everything from miniature figurines to entertainment centers, many of which were then sold though their cut of the profits tended to be insubstantial.

Now that she was out Emma planned on starting her own carpentry business, creating custom pieces. She already had her first customer-Belle and her husband Nate, who insisted they needed a new dining room table for their family of six. It had been amazing reconnecting with her friend after so many years and getting to meet her husband who Emma one-hundred and fifty percent approved. They spent the entire day together and at some point Emma discussed going full-time with her carpentry, which prompted the couple to put in an order for a dining room table. The details of it? They decided to leave those up to Emma, their only request that the table be big enough to seat six. And oh yes, they would also require six chairs.

Emma loved when a customer didn't get too specific as it allowed her creativity to flow even better. Thus far she had selected for it to be fashioned out of red oak and the table's shape as rectangular, two chairs on either side and one on each end. She mulled over something more rustic than classic in design due to Belle and Nate's obvious decorating taste being similar.

For now she decided to ponder possible designs while whittling...something. She hadn't decided that either. Blade untucked, Emma picked up the small block of basswood, placing it upon her lap, fingers brushing its smooth surface. For years she had thought about making one of her own but in prison she hadn't been ready. Now she felt ready to give it a go. A deep breath taken she began to carefully cut into the wood, a bucket positioned between her feet to catch the pieces.

_About to whizz by her house on her fifth time around the block, Emma brought the bicycle to an abrupt halt when her dad shouted her name. Since he sounded excited rather than angry she knew she didn't have anything to worry about. It's not like she had done anything wrong. All right, perhaps she hadn't eaten all of last night's broccoli, tossing about half in the trash when her parents hadn't been looking. Mom usually made it with a bit of cheese melted on top, but she had forgotten to buy some so the tiny green trees had been naked this time._

_Bike walked up to the garage, Emma dropped its kickstand and walked over to the tall, rugged blond man seated upon an old leather couch he practically begged his wife not to put up for sale at the yard sale they had a few months ago. Smiling at his daughter he patted the cushion containing a couple small tears. Once she was settled he dropped a small, rectangular gift-wrapped box on her lap, watching a radiant smile appear on the eleven year old's face._

"_For me?"_

_Emmett nodded, shrugging when asked what for. It was neither her birthday or Christmas. "It's a just because present." He lightly bumped his shoulder to her much smaller one when she simply gazed toward the box. "Open it, Emmy."_

_Excitedly tearing into the paper, Emma pried open the ivory box within, lid dropped next to her thigh. Smile doubling, delicate fingers traced the wood carved ladybug attached to a thin, black rope. A necklace. He had made her the most beautiful, most cool necklace she had ever seen. The pendant about the size of a walnut instead of being painted like the standard red ladybug with small, black dots it shined a brilliant blue with four symmetrical dots on either side. Blue. Her most favorite color in the whole world._

"_Dad, this is awesome! You made it?"_

_His shook his head. "No, Mr. Whiskers did. I taught him how to whittle too. Gave him a little knife perfect for his paw."_

_Young Emma was already quite familiar with smirking and chose that moment to prove it, causing Emmett to laugh. Asked if she wanted help putting it on she handed him the box then turned away pulling long, blonde hair away from her neck. Once the roped necklace was in place she smiled down at the lustrous pendant, an index finger traveling its length._

_Emma's eyes met a set that matched hers. "Dad, ladybugs can be blue?"_

_He nodded. "Most of the time you'll catch them as red, but they can also be orange, blue, black, pink…" A finger tapped her nose causing it to crinkle as she grinned. "I chose blue because it's your favorite and the ladybug because it represents good luck, safety and protection, everything I want my favorite daughter to have."_

"_I'm your _only _daughter."_

"_Yeah, that's why you're my favorite." Emmett heartily laughed when her small hand slapped his forearm, green eyes rolling as though he were the most exasperating person to ever exist._

Not even realizing it, Emma had begun to smile as she worked on the ladybug pendant, foot tapping along with the beat of the song playing on the nearby radio. What color should she make this? Blue? She shook her head. No, she didn't wish to completely replicate the one she wore from age eleven to twenty-four. Emma looked out the garage to the large tree behind the fence to the left. An apple tree, a few of its branches having protruded into her yard.

"Red it is," she murmured.

Whittling continued, a couple songs started and concluded, the next causing the hand wielding the knife to still as it brought him to mind. Not Emmett. A different him. He adored this song so much Emma figured he could replay it for a straight hour and not tire of it. Joe Cocker's version of _A Little Help From My Friends_. Emma softly chuckled recalling the night he sang it at a karaoke bar with indeed a little help from his older friend Emma.

_Resembling a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle Henry stared toward the microphone, one hand tightly wrapped around it. The beginning of one of his favorite songs having been restarted three times he just couldn't push the words from his mouth, though he knew the lyrics like the back of his hand. Though the crowd encouraged him, various people telling him to take his time, he was on the verge of capitulating when a blonde near the front stood and hurried onto the stage, soon wrapping an arm around his shoulders._

_Emma winked at him. "We'll do this together, kid. It is a song about friendship after all." His smile contagious she quickly returned it._

*********

Sander placed on the ground, Emma pushed the goggles to the top of her head and walked around the table as she scrutinized it with every step. An old door she was able to get her hands on for free. If this worked out and if Belle and Nate liked it it would save them money on their dining room table. Fingers ran along its surface. Could use just a bit more. Leaning over to grab her sander Emma laughed as her stomach gurgled. Almost five in the evening and it just occurred to her that she hadn't a bite to eat since a bowl of cornflakes over eight hours ago.

She would call it a day soon and go cook something for dinner, but for now she would like a light snack. Looking out the garage she thoughtfully studied the apple tree, a few of the juicy looking fruits suspended on her property. Hmm. Sauntering toward the fence, she stood on her tiptoes to look over it not spotting any sign of the neighbor she had yet to meet during the week and a half she had lived there.

Seven apples to choose from Emma decided the apple most out of reach appeared the nicest so she left just long enough to grab a two-step ladder, only needing to stand on the bottom step to pluck it off. Teeth sinking into the apple finding it perfectly crisp, its sweetness burst upon her tongue. Emma, however, had little time to savor the delicious fruit.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

The voice unexpected, she almost dropped the apple while scanning the other side of the fence until she spotted a petite-and obviously livid-brunette staring at her. "Um." Chewing resumed Emma finished the bite then licked sweetened lips. "At the risk of stating the obvious I'm standing on a ladder eating an apple." Green eyes narrowed while her brain furiously worked. Something about the woman seemed so familiar. Had they met before? How could she ever have forgotten someone so beautiful?

"_My _apple," she replied, teeth clenching around the second word. She muttered something but it seemed she was now talking to herself as she headed away from the fence. Sliding door slamming behind her Emma chuckled to herself. Ticked off over an apple. Someone needed a therapist asap.

Having lowered from the step ladder Emma had just taken her third bite when she caught movement from the corner of her eye. _Unbefreakinglievable_. That beautiful little spitfire was currently storming up her driveway, arms tense at her sides, hands curled into fists, jaw set, deep brown eyes focused on her. _Oh shit. _Emma actually felt a little shiver of worry creeping upon her. Why? With ten years worth of practice watching her own back in prison she could take this broad out with both hands tied behind her back. However, that didn't prevent her from detecting the 'don't fuck with me' attitude very clear and with those ten years of practice in prison, she had also learned that small didn't always mean weak.

Stopping just a couple feet away Emma noticed her outfit. A nurse perhaps? Black scrub pants and a black top with assorted smiling and laughing emojis scattered all over. That top certainly did not match her disposition. Angry eyes shifted between the bitten apple in Emma's hand to her face. "Just who the hell do you think you are?"

Though an eyebrow lifted in that moment Emma reminded herself not to contribute to the tension. The last thing she wanted or needed was bad blood between she and her beautiful, albeit crazy, neighbor. A polite smile pasted on she switched the apple to her left hand and offered her right, fingers wiggling just a bit. "Hi there. I'm Emma Swan, your new neighbor." She wasn't surprised when the woman merely stared at her hand and so she simply dropped it back to her side pretending not to notice the look of borderline disgust like the brunette across from her deemed Emma's hand contaminated and therefore unworthy of being shaken.

"Miss Swan-"

"Just Emma." She intentionally took another bite, glad it produced a nice, crunchy sound. Although she realized she had just contributed to the tension she didn't care nor did she care that the possible nurse flashed a fresh glare.

"Listen, _Miss Swan_," a finger indicated the lush tree, "that belongs to me as does," the finger aimed toward the apple the new neighbor held, "that apple you took without consent. You are a thief."

Both eyebrows shot upward. Was she serious? "Wow," Emma started in a soft voice. "You're crazier than I initially gave you credit for." If expressions were capable of doing harm the one the brunette just graced her with would have surely dislocated her jaw. It was on the tip of her tongue to apologize, but no. This chick didn't deserve it. "What is _your_ name?"

Arms folded over her chest blocked about a dozen jubilant emojis. "Never you mind."

"Okay. That's weird but okay." Emma nodded with a touch of smartass to her tone. "Miss Neveryoumind, you're making a mountain out of a molehill. Theft? Please. It's just an apple and technically, it was on _my_ property." Swallowing the distance between them, she stood close enough to feel the woman's breath upon her face and to inhale a pleasant scent that reminded her of jasmine. "You don't want me to pluck and taste your apples," Emma whispered, voice sounding in the range of seductive, "I'd suggest you keep the tree on your side of the fence. Otherwise I would be delighted to put my hands on your forbidden fruit any damn time I'd like."

Instead of backing away the woman stepped even closer, so close for a second Emma thought she might kiss her. For just a second she was disappointed when she didn't. However, she did touch her, that pointing finger tapping the middle of her upper chest. "You know what you are?" Full lips curved into a smile stained with iciness. "You're nothing but a thug. An ex-con." Although it was fleeting she noted the surprise. "Oh yes, I've seen you out here, working in your garage in a tank top, those obvious prison tattoos on your arms, hands...the back of your neck. No telling what you did."

Forcing herself not to focus on the fact that the crazy hottie next door had been checking her out and unless she stood on the roof had clearly gone so far as to find herself a ladder to complete her snooping over the fence, Emma produced a smirk. "Damn, you've figured me out, Nev. May I call you Nev for short?" Dirty look expected Emma smiled with brilliance then kept talking. "Just got released from the pen for heading up an apple theft crime ring. It was huge. We stole red, green and yellow apples from all over the country. There was an even a serious cider shortage at some point. I'm just rotten to the...core." She winked while Miss Neveryoumind attempted to burn a hole through her face.

Instead her pointing and jabbing finger was on the move again. "You'd best keep your filthy hands off my fucking fruit!"

Emma frowned quickly followed by pushing her lips out as she curiously gazed toward the fence for a moment. "You mean to tell me beyond that fence you're growing fruit you like to get freaky with?" Another hearty bite and she smirked as sweet juice coated her mouth. "Let me guess. Bananas."

A growl startled her but she tried not to let it show as the spitfire brushed by her, storming into her garage. Turning to watch, Emma wanted to ask what the hell she thought she was doing, yet the words stuck in her throat. The fact her neighbor selected her brand spanking new chainsaw didn't aid in dislodging them.

Though it took her a few moments to figure out how to turn it on, she finally tugged the starter rope enough to bring the chainsaw to life. Not even realizing her lungs were on temporary vacation from doing their job Emma watched as the petite obviously psychotic twit stalked over to the fence and proceeded to slice through every branch until nothing remained on her side of the fence.

Chainsaw discarded without care, the neighbor hurled every felled branch and apple across the fence then turned to Emma who took another amused bite while watching her. She had managed one chew when a vigorous slap to the back of her head caused the piece of apple to escape her mouth, the neighbor deftly snatching it from the air. Well bitten apple also snatched from her grasp the woman said nothing more. Just turned and walked away at the same speed with which she had arrived. Trash can at the end of the driveway, barely giving it a glance she tossed the apple along with the chewed piece into it without breaking her stride.

"Wow," Emma spoke aloud to herself after a full minute of silence. Had that seriously just happened? She looked around, the only evidence the woman had been there a few chips of wood and a couple leaves on the ground along with a hint of jasmine clinging to the air. Legs encouraged to move she went to collect a broom and dustpan to sweep her driveway. "Crazy...beautiful...but crazy."


	3. The S-Block

Her name excitedly and rapidly called by an approaching voice, Emma hurried out the bedroom leaving two members from her crew to continue rolling. She firmly shut the door just as he arrived, an adorable broad grin in place. Not that he hadn't learned what she did during the last couple months they had known one another, but Emma tried shielding him from it as much as possible.

She returned his smile. "Hey, kid. What's up?"

Dark, astute eyes flicked toward empty hands then the closed door Henry had never been allowed entrance. "Where's mine?"

Emma smirked. "I'll give it to you in six years," she responded in a dry voice, causing him to laugh. "So…" She repeated her inquiry causing his grin to resurface.

Standing a little taller, his chest also seemed to puff out. "I did like you said. The S-block. Smooth, sweet and a little silly."

"And?"

"She said yes!" A triumphant fist struck the air. "I'm going to the fucking homecoming dance with the girl I've been crushing on all summer!"

Emma smiled, congratulated her youngest friend then smacked his forehead, smile remaining despite his sudden frown. "What the hell, Emma?" She whacked him again. Harder. "Ow! Stop it!" Henry shifted out of reach although all she had to do was take three steps forward to be in smacking distance.

Emma adopted his frown. "Watch your mouth, kid."

"_You_ drop the f-bomb all the time!"

Thinking she might smack him again Emma folded her arms against her chest. "Strive to be better than me. It exhibits more intelligence, more class to speak without resorting to unsavory language."

Henry appeared unconvinced. "I've actually heard the opposite. Heard people with ample intelligence are more likely to swear."

"Well I've heard there's a chance I'll kick your as—behind if I ever hear you drop the F bomb again." The teenager actually looked a little concerned until she winked at him.

"Hey, kid?"

"Yeah?"

Arms unfolded Emma walked closer and affectionately pinched his cheek. "Good job on getting that date. Proud of you."

A blush staining his cheeks Henry ducked his head. "Thanks, Emma." Head raised a mischievous glint appeared. "Pretty fu- _freakin'_ proud of me too."

She smirked. "Keep it up, kid. Just keep it up and my foot's gonna temporarily have a new address."

*********

The initial plan was to purchase a two bedroom house, yet the moment she toured this one she fell in love despite it being a three bedroom, two bath. That was fine though. When her sister, brother-in-law and their kids visited there would be more room. Not that they lived far away, but if they ever wanted to stay over…

The second bedroom turned into a home gym, Regina passed it on her way down the long hall to the final bedroom. Door pushed open she flicked on the light and glanced around the room. It was a basic guest room, but if she ever felt in the mood she could punch it up. For now there was a full-sized bed dressed up in a gray and black patterned bed in the bag, one nightstand next to it with a clock and lamp atop and a desk tucked against the opposite wall.

Dropping onto the end of the bed with a chilled bottle of beer in hand, dark eyes regarded the small object placed toward the middle of the desk when she moved into this house almost three years prior. A flash drive-_his_ flash drive. The only thing belonging to him she still possessed except the Batman and Robin painting he created when he was fourteen. That had been tucked into a sturdy frame and attached to the wall in her bedroom.

A pull taken from the mouth of the bottle Regina stared at the flash drive she hadn't touched since she put it on that desk. Blinking, her eyes dropped to the bottle. She rarely consumed alcohol but following today's shift, stopping at the grocery story for a six pack seemed like a grand idea. She wondered if she drank the entire pack, would she have enough liquid courage coursing through her bloodstream to insert that flash drive into her computer to check out the digital portfolio labeled _Year 15._

Years ago she discovered this flash drive along with two others labeled years thirteen and fourteen. Somehow she managed to watch those, see his face, read his notes-his digital journal, but fifteen she just hadn't been able to even take a peek at. If she peeked, if she watched and read everything then that would be it. What would happen once it was over? Would reaching the conclusion destroy her all over again? Regina didn't feel brave enough to take that chance, so, that flash drive would remain upon that desk indefinitely. A sigh pushed out, she took another swig, stood up and exited the room, shutting off the light and closing the door behind her.

The sound of a loud power tool being used reaching her ears, Regina quickly made her way out to her backyard, kicked off her clogs and carefully stood on a patio chair to look over the fence. From that angle she couldn't see the blonde, but knew she had to be in her garage doing something. Not for the first time she wondered what she did for a living. Was all that wood she had noticed her carrying a hobby or her job?

Getting down from the chair her eyes landed on the recently chainsawed branches and apples strewn on her side of the fence, another sigh produced. She could admit it. At least to herself. Less than an hour ago Regina had lost her shit. It hadn't been the first time and she certainly wasn't surprised, but now dealt with a massive amount of embarrassment.

Fingers sifted through her hair as she regarded the mess, deciding to clean it up tomorrow. For now she had dinner to make. Disappearing back into the house she soon headed into her kitchen where she selected a cookbook from the small stack upon the counter.

*********

Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes and corn. It sounded better..._much _better than it looked and Emma assumed tasted. The hot, plastic compartment tray dropped on the kitchen table she grabbed a fork, a couple napkins and a bottled tea from the refrigerator before sitting in front of it. The sad, grayish-brown puck of mystery meat stared back at her, a single blob of gelatinous gravy clinging to its side barely trying to disguise the depressing hunk of ground "beef"; it's only bright side being that it only cost her about two bucks. Though it probably wasn't even worth that.

As she miserably poked at it, not for the first time Emma wished she had the ability to cook anything more complicated than a grilled cheese sandwich. Fork in hand she reminded herself that she had eaten worse in prison. Much worse. Hell, in the beginning there had been days when she wasn't allowed to eat. That depended on Felice Umber, the meanest bitch on C-Block's mood.

_Four days behind those walls and Emma hadn't made a single friend, which was fine with her as she had intentionally kept to herself. Seated at her own table within the cafeteria she stabbed a tough piece of meat she suspected might be a pork chop, but wasn't one-hundred percent certain. When the chair to her left made a scraping sound she didn't bother to look up. Yeah, most likely a pork chop._

_A scarred hand with fingernails in desperate need of a manicure slapping upon the table next to her tray caused Emma to regard the short-haired brunette observing her. She did not return a grin tinged with slight yellow. In fact, Emma found it extremely difficult not to recoil, managing to meet that grin with composure firmly intact. A gruff voice announced a name while a hand was placed in front of Emma. Despite the condition of those nails and the back of those hands she found that palm surprisingly soft if not uncomfortably moist. Probably the only thing soft about this woman, Emma silently surmised._

_Once the handshake reached its conclusion the woman leaned over her, lemony grin in place. "You're Emma Swan ain't ya?"_

"_Yes, I __**am **__Emma Swan." Eyes a pale blue narrowing Emma realized she had caught the not so subtle correction. However, the bulk of that grin remained, those little yellowed teeth matched perfectly the provided vegetable of the day: corn._

"_Emma-can I call you Emma?"_

_Ignoring the desire to correct her again a blonde head nodded. "Emma, you're the leader of the Jersey," her brow scrunched in supposed thought, "Dildos, right?" She laughed and when eyes flicked to the four women standing behind them they quickly joined in._

_Emma barely kept her eyes from moving in a circular pattern. "Devils," she murmured._

"_Right right." Felice moistened her lips with a slow protrusion of her thick, white, saliva-slicked tongue while staring at Emma. "Heard y'all sold quality product and you did good for yourself."_

_Emma shrugged wishing this woman would leave her to eat her leather chop in peace. "Yeah, I suppose." She tensed the moment Felice scooted close enough she could count the faint freckles dusting those chubby cheeks. The woman spoke while Emma sipped what had to be the weakest fruit punch on earth from a plastic cup. "I'm not interested," she stated while staring into the watery punch._

"_What?" Felice frowned. "Listen, I'm just trying to be neighborly and offer you in on a little operation here. You go into business with me, we make some serious cash. Know a guard who wi—"_

"_I am," having flipped the fork over Emma struck the table with the end of it as she pronounced each syllable, "not interested."_

"_Okay, okay." A smile adopted, Felice shook her head and motioned to the approaching guard that everything was fine. The moment he turned away the smile faded and she reached under the table to clutch a thigh, fingers digging in enough to make Emma wince._

_Felice made certain to keep her voice low. "Listen, Goldilocks, I'm just trying to make nice but you won't have it, Maybe you don't understand-this is my house." Left hand free she used its index finger to tap the table. "Mine. You fuck with me and you'll be leaving this joint in a body bag. Got it?"_

_Emma made the mistake of nodding, which resulted in her face being slammed into the plate, mashed potatoes dripping from her chin onto her lap when her head was allowed to return to its original upright position again. While Felice again waved the guard away she snatched a napkin from her tray and began slowly wiping off her face. Soon giving up and tossing the heavily soiled napkin atop her plate Emma made to get up, reminded of the fingers digging into her flesh. Keeping her expression blank she made eye contact with the woman._

"_Yes?"_

_Felice resumed studying her then grinned. This would be fun. "You've made quite the mess here, Goldilocks. I suggest you get on your hands and knees and use that pretty little mouth to clean up that bit of potato on the floor." A staring battle ensued while a couple members from Felice's crew exchanged worried glances, both wondering what the hell she was doing goading the leader of the Jersey Devils._

_From what they knew, Emma Swan was a bad bitch and the only reason she had been caught, the only reason she was currently a resident within those walls was because she had given herself up. The police hadn't tracked her down. She offered herself with a bow on top. Some thought her actions asinine, some courageous, but most didn't know what to think. Why had she chosen to give herself up then? It was a mystery people aware of her existence couldn't figure out._

_Felice clapped her hands. "C'mon, puppy." She indicated the small bit of potato about the diameter of a quarter near her shoe. "Clean it up." When Emma reached for a fresh napkin she shook her head. "Uh uh. With your mouth, bitch" Although her gaze hardened she offered the outer region of a trasthigh a gentle pat. "C'mon, you can do it."_

_Despite the multiple pairs of eyes leveled on her, Emma swung her leg over the bench and lowered to the hard, slightly sticky floor, somewhere in the back of her mind thinking whoever was in charge of mopping needed to do a far better job. On hands and knees she studied the potato loathing both it and the bitch making her lick it up._

_She could get out of this. She could fight back, but found she had little desire to. She no longer wanted to be the leader of the Jersey Devils, she certainly wasn't seeking to be top dog inside this prison and she didn't wish to join Felice in a behind bars drug dealing business. She just wanted to serve her time in peace. Yet right now peace wasn't on the menu. Sticky floor potato with a side of gawking was._

_Eyes shutting and tongue emerging Emma obeyed without comment, licking the spot until it shined with her saliva. A growl almost found her throat, but she managed to swallow it while a rough hand patted her head, Felice amusingly reminding her of what a good puppy she was._

*********

Emma managed to eat almost half her dinner before she gave up. Having purchased popcorn she grabbed what was left of the frozen meal and headed into the kitchen tossing it into the trash. A cupboard opened she found the red box and just as she was about to loosen the flap on the side someone pressed her doorbell. Face cloaked with interest Emma headed toward the front door while wondering who it could be. Belle coming to check up on her dining table and chairs? Ruby coming to...pester her?

A smile playing on her lips in response to that last thought the moment Emma looked through the peephole it vanished, annoyance replacing it. Great. What the hell could _she_ want? Emma contemplated pretending she wasn't home, but then decided to behave like a grownup. Although at thirty-four years of age she didn't consider herself much of a grownup she could at least behave like one-temporarily.

Artificial smile donned and door unlocked and thrown open Emma regarded the petite woman standing on the welcome mat with far too much pink in it-a gift from Ruby. She was about to say something when her neighbor thrust a red, rectangular dish with foil covering its top at her. Although the handles were warm Emma was able to hold the heavy dish, a salivation worthy smell reaching her nostrils. Her stomach growled demanding to know what was in the dish. Face coloring Emma observed her visitor. If she heard the telltale noise the pleasant smile upon her lips shared nothing.

"Hello, Mi—Emma." Smile flourishing she indicated the home cooked meal. "Made a lasagna, but it's too much for just me so thought I'd share with you."

Emma stared at her, then blinked, then stared anew. What...seriously what was up with this chick? She yelled at her, insulted her, psychotically sawed off part of a tree, slapped her on the back of the head, stormed away and now pleasantly appeared with dinner like they were good neighbors getting together to eat and play a board game. And made too much? Paranoia reared its suspicious head. What if the nutjob had baked some poison into the cheese or blended it into the sauce?

"Um," Emma glanced between the foil topped dish and her patiently waiting neighbor unsure what to do or say. Finally, she settled on a simple response. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Bouncing on the balls of tennis shoe covered feet, the clogs and her nursing uniform having been replaced with jeans and a navy blue blouse a glimpse of anxiousness cracked the pleasant smile. "Listen, Emma, I owe you a huge apology for my behavior earlier. That was out of line."

Wow. Emma blinked while surprise slipped onto her face. Her favorite pasta dish _and_ a seemingly genuine apology. She shrugged. "It's okay. No worries." She had done far worse than go off on someone for eating an apple so who was she to hold a grudge? Mostly Emma was just relieved this little spitfire might not be as batshit crazy as she initially expected. Them getting along would make being neighbors a smoother, happier experience.

"No." A dark head shook. "I...I'm not usually like that. So...confrontational. It's just that something happened today while I was at work and it put me in a foul mood so when I noticed my tree shaking and then spotted you eating my apple I guess I just decided to vent on a perfect stranger." Hand touching her upper chest with fingers splayed she regarded Emma with a heap of remorse. "I'm sorry. Truly I am."

"What's your name?"

"Regina."

_Regina_. The name scrolling through her brain several times Emma couldn't understand why her stomach had just twisted into knots. Shaking her head she forced herself to stop thinking about it and took a couple steps backward. "Come on in, Regina."

Dark eyes widened. "Your house?"

"Unless you'd rather eat on the roof, which I don't recommend. It's dangerous and I've already suffered a concussion from your beating me." The moment she cracked a grin Regina laughed, a sound Emma immediately decided she would need to hear again.

"It was a little slap to your head."

"Not in my version of the story." She was delighted to be graced with another laugh.

"I'm a nurse so I could check you out."

"Wow." Emma feigned astonishment. "Are you hitting on me now?"

Although she didn't laugh again a grin did find purchase upon full lips. "Emma?"

"Yes?"

Regina pointed toward her own home. "I'm going to grab us a bottle of wine. When I return we'll dig into that lasagna." Not awaiting a response she turned around and walked away unaware her new neighbor tracked her progress all the way to her front door.


	4. An Ex-Con Vibe

Noting the silken red tie binding her wrists to the headboard a grin found purchase upon Emma's lips the moment her eyes greeted the morning light. That grin flourished when she heard a nearby giggle, the bed bouncing as she was joined, a warm body soon flush against hers. A lone finger beginning to lazily traverse her body starting with tracing her lips. Once that finger grazed her neck she turned her head, eyes connecting with a mischievous set.

"This is _not_ what I intended this tie for when I bought it," Emma commented in a voice deepened from sleep.

"Oh really?" She shifted until she straddled Emma's thighs and leaned forward, arms braced on either side of the woman's head, soft, red locks falling around them as the tip of one nose temporarily met another. "Why did you buy it?"

"To wear around my neck."

Those mischievous eyes rolled. "Could you be any more prosaic?"

Emma licked her lips while openly gazing at the naked redhead using her for a chair, wishing she could touch her. Wrists strained against the fabric but all that seemed to do was to tighten the binds. "Not sure. Dunno what that word means."

The redhead laughed, ten fingers now massaging a pair of breasts, the tips immediately responding and rubbing along her palms. "Cygnus?"

Emma groaned, back arching to push more of her breasts into those petite hands. "Told you to call me Emma," she murmured, eyes half shut.

Jubilantly studying Emma's face, she deliberately raked manicured nails along her breasts causing several thin, red lines to surface. "I like Cyngus-it's your stage name."

She gasped in response to the pleasure the raking upon her skin caused. "I'm not a musician, Ariel. Just a drug-" The doorbell ringing caused her to groan for an entirely different reason. Who the hell could that be on an early Sunday morning? Emma didn't have anything planned for the entire day and so starting it with another round of ginger fucking seemed like a great idea.

Ariel ceased raking, lips twisting into a pout. "You wanna get that?"

A grin flitting across her own lips Emma kept her voice low. "I'd much rather get _you_, but suppose I should go see who that is. Untie me." Once her wrists were free she managed to tear herself away from the redhead following a couple kisses, pulled on a pair of sweatpants, a T-shirt and headed barefoot out the room. Squinting through the peephole caused her eyebrows to shoot upward. What was he doing here this time of morning? Did they have breakfast plans she forgot?

A smile in place Emma unlocked and pulled open the door. "Morning, kid. Everything all right?" The smile drifted away the second she noticed her young friend looked like he had been up all night. His clothes were wrinkled, usually perfectly arranged hair mussed and based on Henry's expression something was either upsetting or confusing him.

Apologizing for the early visit finger sifted through his hair somehow managing to mess it up even more. Telling him he had nothing to apologize for Emma wrapped a hand around his and tugged him inside. Playing hostess she asked if she could get him anything to drink. If he had been at least twenty-one based on his appearance she might have offered him whiskey.

Henry shook his head, hesitating when specifically asked if he would like a cup of coffee then shook his head again. Hand grabbed again he allowed himself to be led toward the dining room table, Emma occupying the end chair to his left. Arms resting upon the table and fingers linked Emma regarded him for a moment then in a quiet voice implored him to open up.

A nervous lick of his lips, anxious dark eyes darted between the person he considered his best friend and the basic dark blue tablecloth. "You know that girl I told you about?"

She nodded. "The one you've had a few dates with. Natalie."

"Yeah. I...um…" Settled back in the chair he briskly rubbed his palms together. "She's pregnant and I want to be the father."

Emma stared at him while the wheels turned inside her brain. Although part of her wanted to wrap her hands around his throat another part needed confirmation first. "You _want_ to be the father?" No sane fifteen year old sought to have children.

Henry nodded, an ounce of hope appearing on his face until a palm smacked his forehead. He frowned. "Emma-"

"I thought you wanted to date her? What happened to having fun with a girl with your clothes on?"

A soft chuckle alerted them to someone else's presence. "You mean like you and I definitely didn't do last night?"

Emma groaned. Okay, she might have to throttle them both. Without turning around politely as possible she asked Ariel to return upstairs. Apparently she wasn't keen on listening because instead of following instruction she shifted close enough she could have sat in Emma's lap. Instead she just clutched her shoulder and despite the tension her hand found she kept it there. Introducing herself to Henry she offered her free hand for a shake.

"Henry, I think it's very noble you wanna be in this child's life." The hand recently involved in a handshake brushed a flat tummy. "Just found out I'm pregnant a couple weeks ago and my boyfriend Killian is less than thrilled." She laughed, tapping Emma's shoulder. "Maybe I should get Cygnus here to be the daddy." Ariel laughed again, Henry smiled and Emma looked like she had just opened her mailbox to discover a jury summons.

"Henry," Emma started, a sigh slipping out, "did you use protection?" Her head shook. "Not that it even matters. The baby is on the way. Oh my God." She scrubbed her palms over her face until Henry explained he didn't have sex. Staring at him, Emma's expression shifted between confusion and relief. "But...she's having your baby."

"No. She's having _a_ baby, but the dude who knocked her up doesn't want anything to do with it, so I'm gonna step in and pretend I'm the dad."

"That's great, Henry!"

Before responding Emma took the time to flash her lover a glare, which failed to cause Ariel's proud smile to evaporate. "No, Henry, that's stupid!" He frowned, she frowned deeper. "You like her? Great, be there for her, but under no circumstances do you take on that responsibility. You're fifteen years old. This isn't your problem so don't make it your problem. Support her without putting yourself in the middle."

Slouched in the chair Henry thoughtfully stared toward the table. "I know what it feels like to grow up without a dad," he murmured. "I mean my mom is awesome, but...I've sometimes wondered what it would feel like to have a dad." A hand gently squeezing his shoulder prompted him to meet Emma's gaze. "You know I've been thinking...you're kinda like the dad I never had."

Ariel chuckled. "No wonder I called you daddy last night." Another glare caused her to raise both hands in the air, palms facing the seated pair. "Okay, okay, I'm going back upstairs." Telling Henry it was nice to meet him and wishing him good luck she left the room.

Standing up, Emma pulled Henry to his feet then wrapped her arms around him. Although quick to return the hug he inquired the reason for it. A mouth kissed the top of his head causing his face to heat up. "Because you're the sweetest guy I know." Emma gave him a squeeze. "And I'd be honored to have a son like you."

*********

Over the years (minus those spent in confinement) Emma had tried lasagna from quite a few restaurants and Regina's was amongst the best. She proved her appreciation when she placed another hefty sized square upon her plate and proceeded to devour it until asked what the initials upon her fingers stood for. Fork twirled between her fingers she looked toward her tattooed middle digit.

"Jersey Devils." Expecting the quizzical gaze she nervously cleared her throat, hoping her explanation wouldn't bring an end to the evening as she had been enjoying her neighbor's company. Regina was quite cordial when not assaulting trees and smacking her. "It's a gang." The fork twirled faster. "We sold drugs, which I'm not proud of, but we weren't violent unless provoked. Joined when I was fifteen. Became the leader almost a year and a half later." Try as she might Emma was relieved failing to spot even a hint of judgement upon Regina's face though she wouldn't have blamed her.

"Is that how you ended up going to prison?"

A smirk flickered across Emma's lips. "Going to base your assessment purely on my tattoos?"

Face coloring, Regina grabbed her wine glass and took a sip. "Sorry. Guess I did assume. I can't believe I...I'm sorry."

Thinking it adorable how her neighbor suddenly appeared so shy, ducking her head, Emma's fingers itched to reach over and caress that cheek to ascertain how warm and soft it was. Her brow scrunched. Warm? And soft? Really? _Soft_? What the hell? She just met this chick! Emma blamed her swift fascination on the fact she hadn't shared sexual intimacy with a woman in a decade.

Emma waved her fork around while chuckling. "It's okay." Although she did reach over then, it was only to pat the back of Regina's hand. "I _have_ been to prison, but none of these were given to me there. All pre-prison created."

Dark eyes glanced toward the tattoos on her hands and arms. "For the record they don't really look like prison tattoos. Except for the ones on your hands they'll colorful and intricate."

"So what made you think I'd gone to prison?"

Focused on the plate of lasagna instead of the woman seated across from her Regina's mouth open and closed several times before she clutched the words required for her reply. "They do factor into your image." She did look up then, taking in as much of the blonde as she could with the table in the way. "The tattoos, the way you carry yourself...you just...I picked up a vibe."

Twin brows raised. "I've heard of a gay vibe but an ex-con vibe?"

Regina sighed. "Okay, I lied." She missed those eyebrows further raise when she polished off the remainder of her wine, reaching for the bottle to refill it as additional words were clutched. "Your real estate agent?" Regina glanced toward her catching a shrug.

"Dunno her. My friend took care of all the details to rent me this house."

Regina recalled the bubbly brunette with those twinkling blue eyes and big ti- "Ah, yes. Ruby. I met her. She's very nice."

"Did she tell you I'd been in prison?"

"No, Pam did."

"Who is Pam?"

"Your real estate agent by proxy."

Emma's mouth fell open. She wished she had this Pam's number so she could give her a call for a not so nice chat about respecting her clients privacy. "Dude! What'd she do? Warn you that the house next door had just been rented to an inmate about to be released?"

Regina shook her head. "That house has been sitting there for a while so when she put the sign up that it had been rented I happened to be outside getting my mail and she happily informed me that she had finally moved it. And," fingertips drummed against the table as Regina winced, "she happened to mention that my new neighbor was about to be set free from prison. Please don't be mad. I honestly don't think she meant any harm."

Though part of her still wanted to ask Ruby for the real estate agent's number Emma waved it off. "No worries. As long as we're good."

Regina smiled. "We are."

"Good." Emma returned to eating her lasagna until Regina cleared her throat in that way people did when preparing to ask something that might be difficult.

"Could I ask you a question, Emma?"

Emma kept her face blank while nodding. Here it was. What did you do to be put in prison? "Go ahead."

"Could you tell me about your tats?"

She laughed. It wasn't a comical inquiry yet Emma laughed, gladdened Regina had been able to surprise her. It being the most uncomfortable to get through she indicated the Katakana characters inked in aquamarine across the base of the fingers and thumb of her left hand. "These are Japanese symbols to honor a friend of mine who died a long time ago. It's the translation of their name." Offering her condolences Regina prompted a sigh when she brushed her fingertips back and forth across the small tattoos.

"Thanks," Emma quietly said, pointing toward the second most difficult tattoo to explain, intentionally not providing her neighbor with the opportunity to inquire the friend's name or what happened to them. The name she didn't mind sharing, but what happened...Emma would most definitely rather not get into. Not a single day had gone by without it replaying in her head.

The tattoo applied to her left bicep consisted of a scene. A crystal blue waterfall leading into a tranquil stream bed, sun bright within a clear sky and two majestic swans soaring upward. Angel wings created a border for the peaceful scene.

"This is my mom," Emma near whispered, finger tapping the smaller bird on the left, "and this is my dad. They died when I was twelve."

"Emma." The name sounded so breathy as glistening eyes studied the beautiful tattoo. "I'm so sorry." A year escaped the moment they made eye contact. "Together?"

"Yeah." Without thinking about it a thumb reached over to gently collect that tear. "Went into the foster system after that. Hated it there so I kept running away until they either gave up or couldn't find me. Eventually found the Jersey Devils. They didn't make me miss my parents any less but they became my family and I appreciated and loved them."

"Fifteen is so young to…"

"I know." Emma nodded. "But there have been younger. Sadly even twelve year olds are joining gangs. I was the youngest of JD though."

"How did you become the leader?"

"Our leader Devlin-our name is a play on her birth name-had this lump. She hated hospitals so she refused to get it checked out because it didn't bother her, didn't hurt. After a few months she did, but by then it was too late." Appetite waning as thoughts of the woman she considered her mentor and first genuine adult friend flooded her brain, Emma pushed her plate away. "She was told she had maybe six months to live so strong person that she was, she spent the majority of the time she had left training me to take her place." Emma shrugged. "All these people she knew longer than me, that were older than me and she chose me. I still don't fully understand why."

"Did the others accept you?"

"Had a couple in my corner from the start, but eventually everyone else did." She paused then murmured, "Almost."

_Two weeks following Devlin's burial her crew decided to have a barbeque in her honor at a park. Stood upon the bench connected to a picnic table, Emma raised her preferred bottle of root beer while the women surrounding her raised their chilled beer bottles. Having prepared a speech she loosely proceeded to follow it until an obviously incensed woman pushed through the group, ignoring a couple who called out her name while she focused on their new leader. Pointing toward her she started screaming, taking agitated steps as she looked at every face before refocusing on Emma._

"_Dios mío. I can't believe this shit! Y'all gonna let this blonde, blue-eyed gringa lead you? She's been part of the Jersey Devils for three seconds and she's chosen to be the boss?" Although she pulled a handgun from her waistband she held it at her side, eyes almost coal black glaring toward the one dubbed Cygnus by Devlin just a few weeks prior to her death._

_Someone daring to grab her arm she yanked it away then jumped onto the same bench as Emma. The leader stood still as she approached, not even flinching when the barrel of that gun firmly pressed to her forehead. Several began to shout until Emma raised a hand, eyes remaining on the threat. If fear wracked her body she certainly didn't show it—even when that barrel dig into her skin causing the spot to ache. Emma refused to back away though._

"_I once took a bullet for Devlin but she wanted you." Those coal eyes raked her body with disgust. "You're just a little girl." A tongue moistened her lips before they curved into a grin. "Maybe __**you**_ _should take a bullet for her now."_

_An index finger barely squeezed the trigger when the teenager's knee made contact between her thighs. A shocked, pained breath ripped from her mouth a second prior to a fist connecting with her face, nose crunching in response._

_It all happened so quickly. One moment she stood upon a park bench threatening their new leader and the next found her sprawled on the grass, writhing in pain, blood pooled in her mouth, one eye already swelling, her nose bloody and crooked. Emma seemed to tower over her, still displaying very little emotion as she surveyed what she had just done, hand wrapped around the butt of her new piece._

"_The next time you put a gun to my head you better hurry up and shoot me. Otherwise I will finish you, Theresa. You understand?" The injured woman nodded, gasping when a foot connected with her side reminding her of a most likely broken rib._

_Crouched beside her head the barrel was pushed between her lips, causing coal eyes to widen and her body to tense. A chilled smile sent a shiver racing along her spine. "And my eyes are green, puta."_

The few dishes washed, Regina drummed her fingers atop the kitchen counter while regarding the woman neatly folding a dishcloth. "Two more," she quietly said.

Cloth placed next to the sink Emma looked toward her. "Two more what?"

"Tattoos to tell me about."

Chuckling, Emma walked toward her then displayed her back, pulling her hair up until the nape of her neck was visible showing the tattoo her neighbor had spotted from across the fence but hadn't been able to make out what it was. Another swan, this one completely black except for an orange beak. Without even thinking about her actions Regina lifted a hand, allowing her index finger to trace that long neck just reaching its head when Emma turned to face her. Their eyes connecting neither made a sound until Emma cleared her throat.

"That's my easiest tattoo to explain. Matches my surname."

"And why did you choose to make it black? Doesn't match your parents."

Emma shrugged. Needing something to do she removed the few pieces of silverware from the dish strainer, opened a drawer and took her time placing each utensil in its correct compartment. "A white swan represents poise, purity, beauty…"

"You're beautiful," Regina rushed to whisper. That clinched it. No more wine for her tonight. Touching her, staring at her, calling her beautiful… It had been too long since…

Regina mentally instructed herself to go home. Call it a night before she could have the opportunity to say or do something else foolish. Although she was being perfectly pleasant Emma probably deemed her an unstable person, evidence collected from their driveway interaction and throughout this dinner.

Just as Emma was about to speak Regina intentionally cut her off, claiming she should head home. For a second she could have sworn her neighbor appeared disappointed but then she blinked and it—whatever it had been vanished replaced with a smile as she nodded.

"I could walk you home."

_No. _"Okay." _What the hell? You're supposed to be getting away from her! _"And once there you might as well come in for one of my famous apple turnovers and a cup of coffee. Just baked today." What was the matter with her? She wasn't usually so social. Maybe Emma would ask for a rain check.

Not for the first time tonight Emma discovered herself surprised by this peculiar little woman. She would have bet good money on the fact that Regina abruptly wanted to get away from her following that complimentary slip of the tongue, but now here she was inviting her next door for dessert. And with a bright smile there Emma went accepting.

*********

Upon walking into Regina's house the first thing Emma noticed was the bareness of her living room. Having just moved in _she_ had more stuff. No decorative or loved one pictures upon the walls or upon the one small table in the room. Just a loveseat, couch and that simple square coffee table with a crispy plant upon it.

Noticing where Emma focused Regina chuckled. "I um...don't entertain much. An ER nurse and I'm at the hospital a lot." Grabbing a decorative pillow from the couch she began absentmindedly tugging at a small button sewn into it. "I prefer to work."

The pillow gently tugged from her grasp, Emma hid it behind her back, ignoring an offered frown. "Over what?"

Dark eyes blinked. "What?"

"Why would you prefer to work? What is the alternative?" Noticing a thoughtful expression falling into place she tossed the pillow back on the couch and folded her arms awaiting a response. Emma wondered why she had chosen to ask such a question when she loathed inquiries deeper than a thimble full of liquid.

"I...being alone I suppose," Regina finally answered so quietly the other woman wouldn't have heard her if the room weren't so completely still.

"Why are you alone? It has to be by choice."

Regina chose to focus on the statement. "Why do you say that?"

_Shit._ Caught by her own nosy questions. Hoping she appeared casual while doing so Emma shrugged. "Just think a lot of wo-people would be lucky to have you."

"How do you know? I could be a serial killer for all you're aware."

Emma fake gasped. "You put something in the lasagna didn't you? I'm about to pass out only to later awaken strapped to a frigid table in your basement."

Though it was a struggle to do so Regina managed to keep the amusement off her face, a brow raised instead. "Don't be silly, Miss Swan. This house doesn't have a basement." Crooking a finger at a laughing Emma to follow she headed toward the kitchen, asking what the woman preferred in her coffee.

"Black please."

Regina approached her coffeemaker with a sigh. "So you're one of those."

"One of who?"

"Those java purists." Aromatic coffee grounds added, Regina pushed a button then turned toward her guest with a grin. "No cream, no sweetener...just give me the coffee straight out the pot. I don't know how you do it, but my invisible hat is off to you. I've tried it several times in my life, but my tongue just doesn't agree."

"What _does_ your tongue like?" Emma thought about smacking herself. It was bad enough she said it. It was even worse that her voice reduced to barely above a whisper. However, it was the absolute worst that she obviously focused on Regina's mouth while saying it. _I need to pick up some...what do they call it? Strange._ She grimaced. That word wasn't at all appealing. In fact, it sounded like it alluded to someone quite unsanitary. No, she didn't require strange. Just a good old fashioned lay from a woman she didn't live next door to.

Emma focused just in time to notice the blush. Crap. She probably thought she had been flirting with her. _Weren't you? No. _She groaned. It was one thing to speak to yourself. It was quite another to respond. She wasn't surprised though considering she had plenty of practice in the hole. "I didn't mean that how it sounded. I'm sorry." She experienced some relief when Regina chuckled, turning to grab a couple mugs from a cupboard.

"It's okay. Just been a long time since anyone flirted with me." Steaming pot in hand it paused above the red mug while Regina regarded her in question. "That was flirting, right?"

She hadn't been flirting. Okay, maybe she had been subconsciously. Regardless, the little nurse appeared borderline hopeful so Emma didn't wish to disappoint her. Almost hesitantly she nodded, happy she did the second a smile flit across Regina's lips. She resumed putting their coffees together as Emma poised to speak again. "Find it hard to believe no one has recently flirted with you," she softly said.

A low chuckle unleashed Regina placed two turnovers upon saucers and slid both into the microwave for fifteen seconds. "I tell you no lies, Emma."

Thanking her when passed her coffee Emma occupied the high back leather barstool Regina pointed to. Fingers wrapped around the mug she took a couple sips while thoughtfully regarding the other woman as she removed their desserts from the microwave. One saucer placed in front of her with a napkin, fork neatly atop Emma smiled.

"Were you ever a waitress? You're so…" Emma searched the ceiling for the correct word, "organized."

Stood facing Emma on the opposite side of the counter Regina laughed while using the edge of her fork to slice through the tender, flaky golden brown crust. "Organized? Man, do I have you fooled. I'm about as organized as a room filled with fine china just struck by a hurricane." A piece of turnover pierced and brought to her lips she gently blew. "And yes, I do have waitressing experience. You?"

Emma shook her head. "I've never had official, normal employment." She took a bite, moaned her appreciation then proved that by quickly following with another piece. "Hands down the best apple turnover to ever tantalize my taste buds."

"Tantalize." Regina's face abruptly seemed to glow as she allowed the word to roll over her tongue again. "Very good word and thank you, Emma."

A mouthful of coffee swallowed a smile slipped onto her lips. "Needed something to pass the time so frequented the prison library."

"Did you learn about making things out of wood while there?"

"No. My Dad taught me. He worked for a construction company. I'm trying to start my own carpentry business primarily making furniture and home decor." Using her fork to do so Emma chased a piece of apple around the plate. "Was allowed to start a carpentry program in prison. We would make furniture and sell it, but of course very little of the profits were deposited on our books. Still," she shrugged, "paid better than delivering mail for two cents an hour."

Dark brows shot upward. "Two cents?"

"I exaggerate." Emma displayed a tiny grin. "A little." Following several moments of silence Emma studied Regina after a sip. "Speaking of employment mind if I ask what happened at the hospital today that put you in a...not so good mood?"

"You just did."

Emma might have laughed if the other woman hadn't appeared so troubled. She was about to apologize for prying but sealed her lips the second Regina began speaking. Working in the emergency room her day had of course been busy but going along smoothly enough until she walked into Room 8, coming to an abrupt halt upon spotting the young man stretched out in a skinny bed cradling a broken arm. Despite the pain he immediately noticed her too and managed a smile.

At that point of the story Regina's words faltered, eyes riveted to the salt and pepper granite countertop until she heard her name softly called. Eyes lifting to meet Emma's she attempted to smile, but it didn't quite reach her lips as that troubled expression had not only reappeared but doubled in strength.

"He was a friend of my son's. Especially during middle school-they grew apart after that on account of going to different high schools. Anyway." Paused to collect her words, those dark eyes began to shine prompting Emma to unthinkingly stretch an arm across the countertop hand gently gripping the back of Regina's.

Now focused on the pitchfork tattoo Regina released an audible breath. "My son passed away and Steven reminded me that he would have been a grown man. Perhaps he'd be a college graduate with a job he loved. Maybe had a girlfriend or even engaged." A couple escaped tears trickled down her face,'the hand upon hers squeezing. "Maybe he'd call to excitedly tell me I'm about to have my first grandchild." Fingers hurriedly swiped at her face. "And it hurt seeing Steven. Except for the fracture he has a good, happy life while my son...his ended much too soon."

Although her heart ached for her and more than anything Emma wanted to walk around that counter to pull her into an embrace she reminded herself they were practically strangers. Therefore, a hand over Regina's was the most intimate she should be.

"I'm so sorry, Regina," she murmured, offering that petite hand another squeeze. "What...was he ill?"

Regina shook her head. "He...he was killed." Voice breaking on the last word she tugged her hand out from underneath Emma's, quietly excused herself and bolted from the kitchen, seconds later disappearing down the hall.

What remained of her turnover pushed away Emma sat there for a couple minutes, not knowing what to do. Finally deciding to make herself useful she figured Regina wouldn't be in the mood to continue eating so she walked into the kitchen, tossed their dessert and poured out the coffee cups. Dishwater made and the few dishes and utensils cleansed she placed everything within the strainer then thoughtfully looked toward the hall.

She should check on her, right? Crying people made Emma nervous and she was never certain how to react. What should she say? _Should_ she say anything? Would a shoulder touch or back pat be welcomed or shunned? Was stepping into their personal space for a hug too much? Although she had suffered her share of loss Emma rarely cried in front of anyone, but when she did usually she welcomed a hug as long as it ended when she wanted it to.

The apple shaped clock on the wall alerting her it had now been almost ten minutes since Regina left she decided checking on her was the correct thing to do. Light flicked on Emma headed down the empty hall not bothering to check behind closed doors. The door at the end of the hall open to what appeared to be the master, she felt along the wall until fingers switched on another light, which effectively illuminated the simple bedroom.

A long dresser with a flat screen atop it, a queen-sized bed flanked by a couple nightstands and a vanity with a jewelry box and a large tray filled with makeup and various body sprays and colognes upon it. There wasn't much else. The sound of running water garnering her attention, Emma looked toward a closed door within the bedroom, light spilling from underneath it. Ah, she was in the bathroom.

Should she knock? Maybe she should just wait in the bedroom or return to the kitchen. The water shut off and she internally counted to thirty, the door remaining shut. Emma glanced toward the perfectly made bed. She would give her two more minutes. Headed toward the bed she sat down near the nightstand holding a lamp, alarm clock, a half empty bottle of water placed on a coaster and a framed picture.

The moment she focused on the picture Emma was relieved she had chosen to sit. Although she blinked the shocking image refused to alter. It couldn't...could it? Regina. Mills? Scooting closer to the nightstand she snatched up the picture, index finger tracing a young face beaming toward the camera. No. She shook her head while an enormous wave of dread washed over her. No, it couldn't be.

Something about the pissed off nurse berating her for taking an apple from her tree seemed so familiar and now she suspected. Screw that. She _knew_ even though she wished she didn't. Memories began to play inside her brain despite Emma repeatedly pressing the stop button. She saw her that dreary day standing at the front of the church, tears streaking along a face devoid of makeup, trembling hands gripping the sides of the podium. She spoke of him, every word sounding so heartfelt yet so broken then the massive projector screen behind her began showing a video of him during his almost sixteen years, the song _With a Little Help From My Friends_ playing in the background. So strong in that back pew Emma almost lost it then.

Much like now.

"Fuck," she whispered, hand resembling a branch on a windy day as she returned the framed photograph to its spot. Fingers digging into the tops of her thighs through the fabric of her pants Emma instructed herself not to panic. Obviously she had chosen not to listen considering her heart wildly thumped like it intended to make its escape from her body at any second.

Any second.

Emma glanced toward the bathroom door. Any second Regina Mills would open that door and emerge to discover her guest seated on her bed on the verge of either a panic or heart attack. She would probably race over, crouch before her and place a comforting hand on her thigh, beautiful brown eyes beseeching as she asked what was wrong. And what would she say?

Lips parted, tongue darting over them Emma stared toward the carpet below her feet and breathily said, "I killed your son."

"Emma?"

_Fuck me. _Eyes tightly shut all of one and a half seconds before Emma raised her head, eyes hesitantly meeting those of the woman standing just outside the now open bathroom door. She searched those reddened, puffy eyes, that enchanting face relieved to find nothing more than concern. Oh thank goodness she hadn't heard her. It was still a secret. Question was should it remain one?

Jumping up from the bed Emma shoved her hands into her pockets as she worked on displaying a smile. It felt lopsided but it would have to do. "Yes?"

A fresh tissue in her hand Regina used it to blow her nose. "Are you okay?"

An almost nod switched to a shake of the head. "I have a headache. Feel like someone's banging on it with a hammer." Another glance toward his picture and she leapt from the bed, sudden clammy palms rubbed along the sides of her pants. "Feel nauseous too," Emma murmured that part not a lie and she was quite certain the headache would soon become real. She forced her eyes to meet Regina's. "I should go. Thank you for dinner and dessert."

Regina jabbed a thumb over her shoulder toward the bathroom. "I have acetaminophen or ibupro—"

"No, I'm good, Regina." The smile felt tourniquet tight, damp palm slapping at her outer thigh. "Your son. I'm so sor...I should, have to get—go." Almost moving at the speed someone might use when being chased by an axe wielding figure Emma exited the bedroom and in less than twenty seconds the front door.


	5. You Do You

"That's too fat."

Ruby produced the snorting sound of someone in obvious disagreement while continuing her project, fingers carefully rolling the object upon a tray on her lap. She kept rolling even when a hand slapped her upper arm.

Sitting up Emma pushed hair away from her face. Sheet pushed back and legs drawn up she wrapped her arms around them while studying the woman merely dressed in a pair of skimpy panties seated beside her. "You're stuffing it."

Ruby didn't bother to glance in her direction. "I know."

"It's too much, Rubes."

"There's no such thing as too much weed in a rolling paper."

Although her bedmate didn't view it Emma rolled her eyes. "Actually there's a point it reaches ridiculousness." A proud beam upon her face Ruby thrust the neatly created joint at her. Taking it, Emma pointed toward it. "Prime example."

Ruby's beam persisted. "Okay, cannabis critic. I get it. You gonna light that or what?"

Emma handed it back to her. "Nah, enjoy yourself." Never having tried anything stronger than weed, Emma rarely lit up, much preferring to sell than partake. While her sometime lover carefully lit the joint's tip she took a couple swigs from a bottled water, groaning the moment the doorbell rang.

Completely nude she left the bed and found her pants on the floor near the unlit fireplace. "Swear every time I have a chick over lately someone appears at my front door." A low chuckle reached her ears as she slipped into the slightly baggy sweatpants, an eyebrow arched in Ruby's direction.

While white smoke trailed from the heated tip Ruby greeted the blonde with a smirk. "How many chicks have been in this bed lately?"

Expression unreadable Emma shrugged. "Not that many." A bra forgone she pulled a t-shirt over her head. "Most I've just fucked on the sofa so consider yourself special for having made it into my boudoir."

Laughing in response to the pillow hurled at her head Emma headed out the room. All amusement faded when she peered through the peephole. A swear murmured she adopted an apathetic expression and threw open the door, leaning against its frame as she regarded the man as usual dressed in all black like he considered himself this generation's Johnny Cash.

"Killian, it's almost ten o'clock. What do you want?"

He appraised her outfit, even noticing the nipples poking through that thin shirt and as a result subconsciously licked his lips. "My apologies, love. Were you asleep?"

It wasn't the first time he had used the endearment yet each time he directed it toward her Emma yearned to punch him in what she might have considered a handsome face if he weren't such a douchebag. "No. I was in between fucking sessions." Asked who she had decided to entertain that evening she ignored the inquiry. "I repeat, what do you want?"

"Perhaps I'd like a cup of sugar."

Mouth forming a smirk Emma pushed away from the frame and folded her arms against her chest, convinced his eyes kept straying toward two particular southern points. "I'm all out of sugar, but would you care for some arsenic?"

Killian laughed without a trace of humor. "You're a bitch you know that?"

"Damn, Killian. That's a little harsh just because I don't have any sugar for you to borrow." He stepped into her personal space and though Emma wanted to shift backward because she was offended not only by the strong cologne but Killian Jones' presence in general she forced herself to remain in the same spot while meeting his hardened gaze with a curiously lifted brow. "Forgive me if I'm wrong but you seem upset."

"At first your all girl operation was...cute, but now you and your Jersey Devils need to back the fuck down," Killian said in a lowered voice, intentional intimidation dripping from every word. "This is _my_ town, Cindy."

Instead of allowing the anger to show Emma feigned amusement. "Cygnus," she corrected, knowing he damn well was aware of her name. "And it's my town too. I was born here, unlike you who pretends to be from Ireland, England or some other country. With that weird ass fluctuating accent it's difficult to tell what you're striving for, but we both know you're a corn boy straight outta Iowa along with that obviously American dirty cop who is your brother."

Jaw clenching Killian slid a hand into the pocket of pressed black slacks. "Know your place, little girl."

It hadn't vanished but the pretend amusement had lessened. "Well aware of my place, corn boy." She pointed upward. "At the top with my foot on your head grinding you into the dirt where you belong." A smirk countered his glare. "Now take your jealousy, shove it up your ass and get the hell off my property."

Booted feet remaining upon her welcome mat Killian stared down at his competition of the last few years. Long considering her a blonde fly he often wished she would disappear, but she refused and now...now his wallet was beginning to feel the consequences of her continued presence. "I'm not jealous, _Cindy_. I'm pissed and rightfully so because you're spreading rumors that I'm selling inferior product."

Emma cocked her head to the side and blinked. "But you are. You've been cutting your shit with some nasty stuff that's either dangerous or ineffective. Yeah, we're both dealers but my shit doesn't send customers to the ER unless they overdose. Just want your customers to realize they're better off buying from me. I charge more but it's better quality." She smirked. "I'm a diamond and you're cubic zirconia." An image of a certain redhead popping into her mind the smirk heightened. "Just ask your girl 'cause I'm pretty sure she'd agree with me. Good thing I don't have a dick-a permanently attached one. Pretty sure that baby would turn out to be mine."

Watching as he pulled his hand from his pocket Emma wasn't surprised to see the pocketknife nor was she surprised when shoved against the wall, a sharp blade pressing into the front of her neck. No, she wasn't surprised yet felt a high level of alarm despite the smirk not dissipating. Arms at her sides, hands tightly balled his hot breath fell upon her face as he pinned her to the wall.

"Even the hardest diamond can be broken," Killian whispered digging the blade into her flesh enough to cause a trickle of blood. "I should cut you from ear to ear right now for spilling that bullshit. She's straight and even if she weren't she'd never wind up in bed with a cunt like you." He heard the click before he felt the cool barrel against the nape of his neck. A low chuckle caused Killian to audibly swallow though he didn't release Emma.

"I wonder if I pulled the trigger," Ruby began in a conversational tone, "would it snap your spine? Would it damage your brain, though I don't think there are many cells up there. Might it cause you to choke on your own blood?' She pressed the barrel hard enough to leave an indentation. "If you don't want to find out I suggest you lower the knife and get the fuck out of here."

Proving that he did indeed possess at least a couple brain cells Killian dropped the knife to his side. Blade returned to the handle, with one final glare at Emma he hastily left her house not realizing Ruby continued training the handgun on him just in case he foolishly decided to double back. Emma pushed away from the wall just as the black sports car left the curb, Ruby stepping forward to shut and lock the door.

"You okay, Em?" Gun tucked into the waistband of her jeans she cupped the woman's face, a thumb brushing along her cheek.

Emma nodded. "Thanks to my right-hand woman."

A grin flashed across Ruby's lips. "Right-hand, hm?" The blonde nodded again, that time without comment. Eyes lowered, Ruby examined the short, thin trail of blood, which thankfully hadn't marred the much beloved blue and black ladybug pendant Emma always wore. Her cheek released Ruby swiped the padding of her thumb along the trail collecting most of the blood, leaving a faint pink stain behind. Emerald eyes inquisitively watched as she stuck her thumb between her lips sucking it clean. A wink at Emma and her friend drew in a sharp breath.

"Fuck," she whispered.

Ruby laughed. "What does that mean?"

A blonde head slowly shook as her focus shifted between Ruby's thumb and her face. "I don't know whether to be turned off by that or-" Speech coming to an abrupt halt she once again found herself slammed into the same wall. Except that time a hungry mouth assaulted her instead of a pocket knife. The second that heat inducing kiss ended hands reached up, beginning to unbutton Ruby's shirt. "Definitely not turned off," Emma admitted in a soft voice, a quick movement reversing their positions as she leaned in claiming that mouth.

*********

Fueled by adrenaline since she hadn't drifted off for even a minute, Emma sat upon her couch with her phone in hand waiting for seven o'clock AM. The clock finally surpassing 6:59 she punched in the number she knew by heart then activated the speaker. The moment a groggy voice answered she leapt from the couch and proceeded to pace around the coffee table, phone in an unnecessarily tight grip.

"Ruby, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

"What?"

"You heard me!"

A sigh pushed through the phone. "Yeah, I heard you. Just don't understand the question."

Pacing around the coffee table not providing enough movement quick steps led Emma toward the kitchen. "Why in the hell would you rent me a house next door to her?"

"Who?"

"_Her_ dammit!"

Voice dry Ruby replied, "Oh, okay, the emphasis clears that right up."

Although she pulled the chair away from the small dining table Emma didn't sit down. "I'm not playing with you, Ruby."

"I know you're not, Emma. You're also not being very clear." The sound of rustling indicated that she was mostly likely now sitting up in bed. "What happened? Who are we talking about because I don't even remember meeting your neighbors."

Stood before the coffee maker Emma elected to make a pot thinking the caffeine might help ward off eventual fatigue. "Regina Mills," she whispered like she suspected if she uttered it in a louder voice the woman would appear. Having peeked through the shutters of a window in the living room she spotted her neighbor dressed in a nurse's outfit leaving almost an hour ago for work.

For the next half a minute she was greeted with nothing but silence until Ruby pulled in a shuddering breath. "Regina Mills? Henry's mom?"

Emma nodded, shortly realizing that wouldn't work. "Yes."

"Shit."

"Yeah. Like what? Six, seven billion people on this planet and you have me living next to the woman whose son I killed!"

"Em, you didn't-"

"It's my fault!" Having been absentmindedly watching rich brown liquid enter the glass container her vision blurred. A blink caused a couple tears to race down a flushed face. Wonderful. She had just severed her record of not having cried in nearly a year.

"Emma." Tenderness wrapped around the utterance of her name Ruby sighed. Though in the past they had this conversation on several occasions her friend never listened, never stopped shouldering the bulk of the blame. "You're not the reason he's de-gone. You're not the one who put a-"

"I might as well have. He shouldn't have been hanging around us in the first place." Over the last decade she often thought of different choices she could have made. If she had walked away from Henry after coming to his aid at that pizza parlor. If she had turned him away when he popped up wanting to hang out. If she hadn't slept with a pregnant woman then taunted her boyfriend about it.

He would have been better off if she minded her own business that night. Sure they would have continued pushing him around but at least he would have been alive. Plenty people endured bullying, eventually rising to the top, taking control, becoming stronger, learning to stand up for themselves. Henry Mills definitely would have become one of those people. Actually, he had in his final moments…

Those shouldn't have been his final moments though. Almost sixteen. He had been robbed and Emma would forever consider herself the primary thief.

"You're right but no use crying over spilt milk."

Eyes narrowed Emma snatched the carafe from the coffee maker and shakily filled a mug before slamming the hot pot on the counter. "Fuck you, Ruby."

Another sigh. "I didn't mean that to sound so cold. It's just...it's been ten years, Em."

"Is there a time limit on how long I'm allowed to feel guilty?"

"You need to forgive yourself."

"If I live long enough to see triple digits that will not happen." Fingers curled around the mug's handle, she picked it up and blew along its surface while pacing through the kitchen.

"Why?"

"Because the remains of an innocent, sweet, smart, funny teenage boy are six feet under while my thirty-four year old ex-drug dealing, ex-gang leader, cheating, violent ass is still here recently given a second chance. It's not fair." Voice having broken on that last word, hot tears stained her face as she continued the aimless walk, circling the dining table.

"It should've been me. _I_ should be in that box. Not him. He should be a college graduate with a job and a girlfriend who he just moved into an apartment with. They should be arguing about how to decorate but eventually Henry would cave because he's so sweet and in love he's willing to concede to anything she wants. And then she'll show him a mobile she wants to decorate with, but he's like that's for a baby then she'll point toward her belly. For a moment he'll stare at her blankly then that adorable smile of his will surface and they'll hug and shed happy tears together."

Unbeknownst to Emma tears rushed to Ruby's eyes. "That's beautiful, Em."

Emma slumped in a chair and unceremoniously dropped her mug on the table causing some of its liquid to slosh onto the wood. "It's a dream," she replied in a ragged whisper. "Reality is a nightmare." Asked what she intended to do she shrugged then realized Ruby couldn't be privy to it. "I don't know. Can't tell her. Not yet anyway."

"Then when?"

A hand scrubbed over a dampened face Emma groaned. "I'll just steer clear of her. Just because we're neighbors doesn't mean we're obligated to communicate." Emma once had a cellmate named Nell for six months and over those months they spoke maybe a collective one-hundred words to one another. There hadn't been any bad blood between them. Nell just opted to keep to herself, spending the majority of her time knitting or with her nose buried in a borrowed library book.

"Right."

"You sound unconvinced. What do _you_ think I should do?" Suspecting it might now be a safe temperature to drink, Emma picked up the mug, a few spilled drops dripping from it as she brought it to her lips taking a small sip.

"I think you should do whatever you think is best, Em. You do you."

Mug returned to the table Emma smirked. "Wow, you're all kinds of helpful."

"Waking me up at the butt crack of dawn this is the best you'll receive."

"I wouldn't consider seven a.m. the butt-"

"In my opinion it is."

The edge of the mug near her lips Emma softly chuckle despite still experiencing a vast amount of stress. "Okay then. Butt crack it is."

*********

Belle and her husband's project finished, Emma was in the midst of working on another for a neighbor across the street who power walked passed her house the week prior taking an instant interest in what she was doing in the open garage. Money no object she wanted a custom built entertainment center, large enough to house her large collection of books, albums, a dozen or so precious knickknacks and a fifty-five inch flat screen.

Sanding a piece of wood that would be used as a shelf, her thoughts drifted to her next door neighbor. It had been six days since their dinner and thus far Emma had managed to dodge the few attempts Regina made at opening the lines of communication. Fortunately they hadn't exchanged phone numbers, otherwise she had a feeling Regina made have called and/or texted her.

A couple times she waved, once when spotting Emma headed to her car, which she usually parked in the driveway and once as she stood at her mailbox leafing through a catalogue. She also knocked once but treating her like a Jehovah's Witness Emma pretended she wasn't home despite her car being a dead giveaway. Though Emma felt horrible having ignored her waves and her housecall she just couldn't. How could she possibly forge any kind of relationship with the woman whose son's death she played a significant role in? No matter how much she had enjoyed Regina's company that evening that had to be the end of it. Eventually they could become those neighbors who merely smiled and nodded in greeting every so often.

The sound of a car door shutting pulling her from her thoughts, Emma looked up, taking a few steps forward to peer around her car, discovering another parked at the curb. A young man dressed in jeans, a T-shirt and a baseball cap with the words _Preston's Pizza _embroidered on its front carried a large pizza box with a white plastic bag atop. Catching her gaze he offered a smile, coming to a halt just inside her garage.

Though she hadn't eaten dinner yet and her stomach practically gurgled at the thought of being filled with delicious ooey gooey cheese on bread, she was on the verge of telling him he had the wrong house when he asked if she was Emma Swan. Eyes narrowed she glanced toward the box and bag then without giving it much thought snatched a tool from a nearby table. A hand axe. Emma didn't have an immediate use for it, but it looked so cool and had been on sale she felt compelled to purchase one the other day.

A tight grip on its scaled handle she held it above her head, the overhead light glinting upon its sharp black blade. The supposed pizza boy's eyes widened. Good. She had his attention. "Who wants to know?" Emma asked, voice low. When he stammered a what she growled. "Are you deaf? Who the fuck wants to know?"

"I...I…" He shifted from one foot to the other, tongue sweeping across his lips. "Oli...Oliver. Me." One hand releasing the box he was about to point toward his chest until Emma demanded he return that hand to where it had just been.

"If you take even the tiniest step or if you remove one of your hands from that box again I will throw this axe so effectively you'll have much more than a splitting headache. Do you understand me, Oliver?" Glaring at him she drew the axe back despite his vigorous nod. "Who sent you here?" Truthfully, Emma wasn't at all certain she could strike him with the axe since she had zero practice throwing one, but if necessary she would most definitely try. For now she endeavored to bluff her ass off and if the expression Oliver wore was any indication it was working.

Even with the distance between them his deep swallow was audible. "Preston's Pizza. I'm just...I deliver food. That's it."

Emma appeared unconvinced. "Really."

The sigh that pushed from his lips sounded like it was filled with the utmost despair. "Look, ma'am, I just took this job so I could save up some money to treat my girl to an impressive night on the town so she'll finally have sex with me." Cheeks beginning to color he glanced between Emma's face, the hand axe and the ground. "I'm seventeen and like the only one of my friends who's a virgin. I'm not trying to graduate high school a virgin, you know what I mean?"

Emma ignored his inquiry and kept her weapon poised to hurl. "How do you know my name? I didn't order a pizza. I've _never_ ordered a pizza from that place."

"Ma'am, I'm just delivery dude. Don't throw an axe at the messenger." Nervously laughing at his own little joke, Oliver flinched when she barked her question at him. "I was told to deliver to Emma Swan at this address."

Grip so tight Emma was certain her knuckles had paled. He looked so harmless, so clueless she was starting to believe maybe he didn't mean her any harm, that he hadn't knowingly been sent to injure her or worse, but she still didn't trust the contents of that box or bag. "Who ordered the food, Oliver?"

Beads of sweat having appeared on it, Oliver's face scrunched in thought. "A Regina Hill I think."

Emma's surprise showed. "Mills?"

For a few seconds Oliver resembled a bobblehead. "Yeah! I didn't take the order but was told a Regina Mills wanted this delivered to you and that it's already paid for. That's all I know, ma'am. I swear." Following a pause frightened eyes lit up. "Oh! There's a note taped to the box, but I dunno know what it says. Someone else at the restaurant wrote it and put it in an envelope. Really that's all I know. Please let me go," Oliver finished in a desperate whisper.

Years of being locked up caused a flicker of paranoia to remain. Why would Regina who lived right next door have a pizza delivered to her? Had she discovered the truth? Was this some type of revenge? Had they teamed up? No. No, that didn't remotely make sense. Axe in her right hand above her head her left pointed toward the ground. "Put that stuff down. Slowly. Then stand back up, link your fingers behind your head and take five steps backward." She watched his every move as he followed her instructions, doing everything perfectly and practically in slow motion. So slow in fact if Emma hadn't been in paranoid mode she might have been amused.

Hoping she hadn't misread him, she dropped the axe and approached. The moment she crouched her stomach growled demanding she open because the contents of the box and bag smelled divine. Okay, perhaps a pizza did rest inside there instead of a rifle.

While continuously glancing toward the mannequin impersonating delivery boy Emma opened the bag finding a styrofoam take-out box filled with buffalo wings and another cheesy bread along with a cup of marinara sauce. Loosely inside the bag were two cups of what appeared to be ranch dressing, packets of Parmesan cheese, red pepper flakes and moist towelettes and a thick wad of napkins.

Bag pushed to the side Emma ignored the envelope for the time being and opened the box indeed discovering something edible rather than lethal. A large unique looking pizza greeted her. Emma had never seen anything like it. Ten slices with five matching pairs. A couple pepperoni, a couple sausage, two ham and pineapple, two mushroom and a set of cheese slices. The aromas blended into something that had her stomach going crazy as it demanded she select a piece.

Head lifted to curiously stare at Oliver he countered with a shrug. "I dunno know why it looks like that, ma'am."

Lid closed before she rose to her feet Emma noticed him wince the second she reached into her back pocket and almost laughed. Poor kid. All he sought was to get laid. She heard him emit a relieved sigh when he spotted the wallet instead of another weapon.

"You may take your hands off your head and relax now." In honor of the pizza pairs Emma withdrew a couple twenties, which she offered him. "Sorry about the hand axe, Oliver."

Damn near every tooth in his mouth visible Oliver grinned while folding and pushing the bills into his pocket. "No worries, ma'am! Thanks so much." Scuffed sneakers took a couple steps backward, the teenager jabbing a thumb over his shoulder. "So I can go?"

Emma nodded, amusement close to the surface as he remained somewhat hesitant like some part of him suspected she might decide to snatch up the axe and throw it at him once his back was turned. "Have a good evening."

Body further relaxing, his grin broadened. "You too."

*********

Although realizing the food might cool while she did so Emma decided to take a quick shower since she felt sweaty from working hours on the entertainment unit. A couple bottles of beer grabbed from the fridge, she added them to the bag and picked it up along with the pizza.

While walking over to her neighbor's house she repeatedly sighed. She had attempted to keep her distance yet Regina seemed hellbent on that not happening for some reason.

How would this work? How could she possibly forge a friendship with this woman? It was much too complicated. Stood upon her doorstep it took her the better part of two minutes to poke the doorbell with an index finger. Emma didn't realize she had ceased breathing until Regina opened the door with a welcoming smile. Oxygen filling her lungs Emma somewhat returned that smile then cleared her throat to speak, yet not one single word passed her lips.

"Emma! Long time no see!" Regina glanced toward the fragrant cargo. "And you brought me dinner?" A twinkle in her eyes that welcoming smile switched to a grin. "How thoughtful of you."

For a second Emma questioned if she truly was responsible for the food, but then shook the stupidity from her brain. Of course she was. Oliver along with some other Preston's Pizza employee said she set it up. And speaking of what kind of name was Preston's Pizza? It sounded like a very mundane place to eat.

_Focus Emma_. "_I _brought _you_ dinner?" Food balanced on one arm, Emma reached into her back pocket for the envelope, which she handed to the other woman, instructing her to read its contents aloud. She closely watched noticing as Regina attempted to swallow another grin while pulling out a small sheet of paper.

"Roses are red. Violets are blue. That pizza smells scrumptious. Your neighbor is hungry too." Regina laughed. "I didn't ask them to add a smiley face."

"Oh?" Amusement replaced some of the anxiousness. "Was that intended to be a serious poem?"

Merely answering with a grin Regina took a couple steps backward, sweeping an arm through the air. "Do come in."

Experiencing a flash of the framed photo within her neighbor's bedroom Emma walked inside the scent of cinnamon causing her nose to twitch. She wondered if she had baked again or if that were maybe one of those melted candles that were popular now. Seemingly having access to her thoughts Regina mentioned having made a pan of cinnamon rolls.

Emma hoped she couldn't hear her stomach exclaim that it was a fan of cinnamon rolls. If the growl had reached her ears Regina didn't comment. "You're just a regular Betty Crocker. Can't wait to taste."

All expression wiped from her face Regina stared at her for a moment then murmured, "Taste...me?" She managed to keep her face blank until Emma's sputtered explanation caused a brief giggling fit. "Relax, Emma. I'm kidding." Grabbing the plastic and paper bag from atop the pizza box she asked her guest to follow her into the kitchen.

"You like beer?"

A six-pack of frosty beers extracted from the bag, Regina placed them on the counter while nodding. "Don't drink it often but do like a cold one on occasion." Selecting two bottles she handed one to Emma and began removing the twist cap from the other.

Her own cap tossed on the counter Emma took a swig. "So why did you surreptitiously send me pizza and wings?"

"Surreptitiously." Impressed written all over her face Regina clinked their bottles. "Great word, Emma."

"Had a lot of time to read." Her neighbor abruptly looked so serious Emma softly smiled, reaching across the counter to pat the back of her hand. "It's okay, Regina. I've been in prison and I don't mind talking about it. Well...some of it." She shrugged. "Anyway, it took up ten years of my life so I won't ignore it." Another mouthful swallowed she pointed the bottom of her bottle toward Regina. "So why did you?"

Although all her nails were trimmed short Regina managed to start loosening the beer label. "I wanted to apologize for that night. What hap...how it ended."

_She is apologizing?_ Emma nearly dropped her beer. If either of them had any apologizing to do to the other it would most definitely be her. There was so much she had to apologize for and if she were to tell Regina "I'm sorry" a thousand times it still wouldn't be near enough. Resisting the urge to come up with another lame excuse to bolt Emma drained half her bottle instead. "Regina, you don't have anything to apologize for. You had just shared something so painful, so tragic with me and instead of consoling you I ran. _I'm _sorry. It was easier for me to pretend I had a headache than to...I don't people well," she finished in a whisper.

"It's okay, Emma. I hear the local community college has a course if you're interested to learn."

"Oh really? You think I could earn a degree in Peopleing?" A smile upon her lips Emma thought about how sweet and funny her neighbor was turning out to be. She seemed completely different from how she behaved with Applegate. And really Emma now realized she deserved that slap to the back of her head because really she had been the cause of Regina's foul mood. And with that thought the smile slipped. Hoping a light beer buzz along with the pleasant company stood before her would bring it back she took another pull.

A couple plates removed from a cupboard Regina nodded. "Most definitely, Miss Swan! And if you took additional courses you could wind up receiving your PhD in Peopleing. That's huge. You could do so much with such a high degree and then I would proudly refer to you as Doctor Swan."

The smile returned and Emma knew it didn't have a thing to do with her frosty brew. "I like you." Eyes widening, she wished to escape under the barstool she occupied. One might have thought she used the big L word based on her flustered reaction to it. Polishing off the remainder of her beer she murmured a thank you when the empty bottle was replaced with another, the cap already taken away.

Playing with the small metal cap Regina observed the blonde while softly responding, "I like you too." She wasn't stupid. Regina was quite aware Emma had been avoiding her and usually she would have respected that and let the elusive person be, but something about this woman had her thinking of various ways to gain her attention. She made her feel...something. Even before they officially met Regina would stand on a chair in her backyard just to covertly peep over the fence watching a casually attired Emma with her hair usually in a ponytail or messy bun working inside her garage, occasionally singing along to the music she often played. Regina felt like a voyeur but that "something" she experienced kept her curious because she hadn't felt it in years.

Warmth rushing through her Emma suspected it had little to do with the beer. Though she hadn't taken a sip from the new bottle her fingers curled around it. "Name one thing you like about me."

"Your tats." And Regina was far from a tattoo lover. Not that she had anything against those who wore them, but she had never been interested until now. Cora, her mother, would've had a fit if she brought someone home with even the smallest tattoo. She might have fainted if her eldest daughter brought someone with as many tattoos as Emma home-add that to the fact she was a woman. Imagining her mother sprawled on the floor out cold almost caused a smile. "Which reminds me, you have one more to tell me about." She grinned as a chuckle sprang from Emma's mouth. "Right after you tell me one thing you like about _me_."

She didn't need a single second to ponder. "The fact that you're a nurse lets me know you care about providing care for others. Granted there are some lousy, unpleasant nurses out there but I have a strong feeling you're one of the great ones. In the category of nurses who give a damn and I admire that because it can't be an easy job." And it didn't hurt that she was very easy on the eyes. Emma certainly wouldn't mind being her patient.

A beam suffusing her face Regina thanked her. "There are times when I'm exhausted—the ER is packed or I'm working a longer shift but I always seek to give a hundred percent. Now, show me the tat." She smiles when that earned her another chuckle. Asked if she was interested in getting one she shook her head. "Just like the look of yo—them."

"If ever you should change your mind I'll take you to my guy. He's awesome." Short-sleeve rolled up, Emma stood up and walked around for Regina to receive a better view.

The tree was black and magnificently stood along Emma's arm, thick, long branches extending over her shoulder. The tree flush with colorful leaves they created a rainbow pattern and had been designed to look like they were blowing in the wind.

Regina resisted the urge to brush her fingers along it, busying herself by opening the pizza box instead. "That is so beautiful. LGBT related?"

Emma nodded, selecting a slice of pepperoni and ham and pineapple to put on her plate. "I'm gay and here to stay. Get used to it."

Regina laughed. "Love it." Two slices added to her own plate she reached for the bag containing the buffalo wings. "I'd like to have a bumper sticker that says that, a tiny version of your tree next to the words."

"So you're family?" Emma didn't know why she was so pleased. Not like anything would happen between them. Forging a friendship with her would be difficult enough. The final dream she had behind bars popping into her head Emma wondered if it were possible that had been a sign from Henry. Perhaps he wanted her to become friends with his mother. _Or maybe you're just searching for a reason to keep her in your life_.

Box of wings opened Regina situated it between them so they could both add the small pieces of chicken to their plate. "If you're asking if I'm gay, yes." An eyebrow lifted in response to a grin threatening to take flight from Emma's face. "Does learning this please you?"

"Yeah." A blonde head bobbed. "Every time I discover a new member I receive a thousand bucks from the Rainbow Committee."

Regina laughed so heartily she almost dropped her plate on the way to the microwave. Food safely placed inside she punched a couple buttons. Turning to face Emma she leaned against the counter, arms folded over her chest. "So, am I getting a cut?"

Emma sighed like she had just been asked for a liver donation. "If I must share you may have ten percent."

"That's it?"

"You get to be gay. That's worth more than all the money in the world."

Pretending to ponder that Regina nodded by the time the microwave beeped. "So true. You're a wise woman, Emma."

A grin in place Emma thanked her then indicated the microwave and picked up her plate. "Now remove yours so I may heat up mine. Haven't eaten in hours so I'm experiencing an edacious appetite."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Edacious. Now you're just showing off." Smirking in response to a laugh she turned around to open the microwave.


	6. A Little Bit

Finding the library to be the quietest place in the prison except for the chapel, Emma sat on the floor with her back pressed to the wall between two long rows filled with history books. Inmates rarely wandered along this aisle, therefore, it was her favorite place to read.

At least it was until she heard a cleared voice and looked up to find her tormentor standing there, a smug look upon her face and four of her flunkies at her sides. Lemony grin in place she took a couple steps forward, indicating for the others to stay put.

"Good afternoon, puppy. Are you being a good girl?"

With some effort Emma managed to conceal a scowl, instead nodding an apathetic expression clicked into place. Asked what she was doing, she held up the book so the other woman could view its title. Felice squinted then shook her head.

"Can't read that from here. Bring it to me." The moment Emma began to rise she clucked a thick tongue. "Here I thought you were being a good girl. You know the rules. Follow 'em and bring me that book the right way, Emma."

Just barely Emma refrained from glaring. Many times. So many times over the last couple months she had contemplated punching this bitch in the throat, but then succeeded in talking herself out of it. She loathed Felice Umber but she wouldn't fight because she deserved this. Allowing her to do what she wanted wouldn't change the past, wouldn't bring the three of them back, but Emma deemed this as part of her penance.

Because it was a paperback novel Emma shoved the dog-eared copy between her teeth and bit down hard before rolling to her hands and knees. A glance toward Felice's empty hands and she breathed a sigh of partial relief. Although not nearly as much she also loathed the thin cord snipped from some electronic device Felice referred to as her leash. There were still faint traces of the bruises from the last time she had been forced to wear it.

Pride swallowed Emma crawled along threadbare carpet while trying her best to block out the snickers. Catching movement about ten feet behind them she spotted a guard walking by, not surprised he didn't walk over to intervene. She didn't know what Felice offered him, but whatever it was it kept him out of her business. Sighing around the book she stopped crawling when close enough to butt her head against Felice's legs. Head bowed, their eyes didn't meet until a rough hand yanked her head back, a grin causing her to feel nauseous. The book yanked from her mouth Felice instructed her to get into position.

Shifting until she knelt, butt touching the heels of her feet, Emma placed her hands on her thighs continuing to keep her gaze toward the floor. A laugh didn't cause her to peer upward but the paperback slapping the top of her head did. Nothing revealed on her face she looked at Felice.

"Moby Dick?" Felice flipped through the pages without reading a single word. "Is this straight porn? Thought you were a dyke."

"That's a classic novel. You've never heard of Moby Dick?" Too late Emma realized she had made a mistake as Felice was certain to label her response disrespectful. Sure enough the slap across the face was a reminder to watch her mouth. The book thrown at her chest, a hand grabbed a fistful of her hair pulling until she winced.

"Why do you try to make me sound stupid, puppy?" She tugged harder. "Take care of you and this is the thanks I get?"

Emma apologized only for those fingers to pull with such vigor for a moment she thought Felice might succeed in tugging her to her feet. Whispering another apology she was told to shut up. Concerned she might earn an additional slap she pressed her lips together, dread filling her when Felice rubbed her free hand along the crotch of denim pants. "Think I have a better way to shut that smart mouth of yours."

_Fuck._ "Listen, Felice-" So much for trying to prevent another slap. The right side of her face throbbing Emma swore tiny stars twinkled before her eyes. She had to blink several times to make them dissipate. The last star disappeared just in time to catch a glare, Felice's face cheeks flushed with anger.

"What did you just call me, puppy?"

"I'm so sor-"

"If you were respectful you wouldn't have to say you're sorry so much." Felice nodded. "But you are though. You're the sorriest little motherfucker I ever seen." She indicated her crotch. "Take it out and suck. And it's best if you do it well 'cause, puppy, you'll need the lube." A sick grin twisted her lips, her flunkies following suit as they silently stood until instructed to take action.

Control wasn't something Emma was used to being without and submitting was definitely not weaved into her DNA, but since being in prison, since dealing with this golden toothed, stereotypically butch bitch she had learned to relinquish. She _could_ fight back yet she wouldn't. She had survived so much in her twenty-four years, but this...this was something she didn't feel it right to oppose. Emma hated it and yet she had every sadistic action coming. She earned it.

Those denim pants undone, Emma had to push back the urge to gag as she removed the large strap-on. Over the last couple months she had seen a couple types of homemade dildos-a toothbrush wrapped in a sanitary pad covered with one of the fingers of a glove and a colorful one fashioned out of melted Jolly Ranchers, but Felice had been able to get a genuine dildo smuggled in. Probably the guard who was an expert at ignoring prohibited activity.

"Puppy! Suck it already."

Head throbbing, face stinging and stomach roiling, Emma wrapped a clammy hand around a substantial base, dry lips parting. "Yes, Sir."

*********

"So…"

Although her eyes remained on what she was doing, ascertaining that the shelves were level, a groan erupted. "Just made that two letter word sound like it has five syllables. Crouched in front of the bookshelf she was building for a customer, Emma moved the instrument to another shelf. "What's up?"

Seated atop a barstool with wheels Ruby shifted closer to her friend. "I could ask you the same thing. What's going on with you and your neighbor?"

Emma shrugged. "We're friends."

"With benefits?"

Finally looking toward the person she considered her best friend Emma rolled her eyes. "I'm not having sex with anyone including Regina."

Head cocked to the side Ruby studied her. "Are you still celibate? You've been out like a month." Concern etched her brow. "Ten years without sex just isn't healthy, Emma!"

"Uh...hey."

Some might have thought it comical, their heads turning in perfect synchronicity toward the entrance to the garage. And speaking of her, there Emma's neighbor stood, an awkward look upon her face, dark eyes darting between the two. "Am I interrupting?" She turned preparing to leave. "I can go."

"Don't you dare!" A grin splitting her lips Ruby ignored Emma repeatedly murmuring her name and jumped, hurrying over to Regina. "Hey, Regina! Long time no see. Remember me? What's been going on?"

Sliding her palm along the one offered, Regina shook it. "I do and not much. Just working."

Crimson stained lips pushed out Ruby shook her head. "Well, that's no good. All work and no play makes Regina the hottie wasting away on the couch binging Netflix. Not that you can't do that sometimes, but…"

Ruby a professional at mischief, from several feet away and despite only viewing half of her profile Emma could tell she was up to something. She bolted from where she had stood shortly after Regina's arrival and jogged over to intercept whatever her friend intended to say next.

"Sounds like you could use some fun in your life. What're you doing tonight?"

Emma tried to be casual about bumping her hip against Ruby's to gain her attention. A much too tight smile upon her lips she glanced between the two. "Ruby, I'm sure Regina has better things to do than to spend an evening with a bunch of ex gang members."

Ruby's head shook in disagreement. "Think we could show her a better time than Netflix." Those crimson lips regarded Regina with a bright smile. "Am I right or am I right?" She ignored the glare her friend sent her despite knowing precisely what it meant. At that moment she was certain Emma wished to kill her and she had plenty tools within that garage to make it happen.

"Um," dark eyes chock with indecision regarded them both, "thanks for the invite, Ruby, but I had a long week. So going to kick off the weekend with a bubble bath, bake some brownies and watch a movie."

"Brownies?" Ruby's mischievous grin was dangerously close to taking control of her face. "Oh, Reggie—may I call you Reggie?" Despite Emma's quietly groaned protest she shifted closer to Regina, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

Indecisiveness mixed with confusion and yet a hint of interest Regina shrugged. In forty-one years it was actually her first nickname unless it counted when her ex referred to her as the Duchess of Dullsville. "Sure."

"Reggie, I think you are the yin to my yang."

The confusion mounted as Regina wondered what the hell she was talking about. "Am I? How so?"

Though she heard Emma murmur her name Ruby ignored it. "You have brownie mix-"

"Actually, I make them from scratch."

"Really?" Ruby's smile might have one thinking she just won the lottery. "From scratch. Isn't that something?" She sounded so amazed. Looking toward Emma she pretended not to see that frown. "You hear that, Em? You live next door to a super sexy Betty Crocker!"

Emma scowled, Regina blushed and Ruby looked supremely pleased, attention returned to the smaller woman tucked to her side. "Anyway, as I was saying, Reggie, you're my yin. You know how to bake from scratch brownies and I happen to have a premium bag of Mary Jane in my car."

It was at that moment Emma repeatedly smacked her best friend in her mind. "Ruby, dude! She's a nurse!"

Ruby spent a few seconds simply staring back at her before blinking. "And my Uncle Keith is a doctor who smokes like a choo choo train. He goes through two packs a day. What's your point?" Making it obvious she didn't really care to have an answer provided she gave Regina a light squeeze. "Ever made pot brownies, Reggie?"

Regina shook her head. "Never made, never consumed." Asked if she had ever tried marijuana her head shook in the negative again.

The Cheshire grin made its appearance. "Tonight is your lucky night. Forget Netflix. You're hanging with the ex Jersey Devils."

*********

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Regina having gone home to take a quick shower before Ruby joined her so they could bake together, Emma felt safe yelling at the top of her lungs inside her living room. She was pissed for several reasons including Ruby's amused expression as she sat upon the couch, laid back with one leg crossed over the other and sipping a bottled beer like she had nary a concern.

"What do you mean?" she calmly responded.

Having been pacing, Emma came to an abrupt halt in front of her, lips parted as she stared. What did she mean? What did she fucking mean? Perhaps it was time to smack Ruby in reality. "You just invited the woman who has no idea we were the last people to see her son alive to my house to eat pot brownies and get to know the drug dealing gang he used to spend time around unbeknownst to her. How in the holy hell," hands shaking in front of her face Emma wished Ruby's neck were between them, "did you decide this was a smart idea? Did it occur to you that someone could eat one too many brownies and reveal something to _Reggie_? I've always thought you had a decent head on your shoulders but apparently you've lost your goddamn mind!"

"Whoa." Both legs placed on the floor Ruby sat forward, setting her bottle on a coaster as she looked up to her friend. "You need to relax. Everything is gonna be okay."

Emma waited but when nearly a full minute passed she realized Ruby's response had concluded. "That's it? Gonna be okay? That's all you got for me?"

"What do you want me to say, Emma?" she softly spoke, both sounding and looking like a therapist without a notepad and pen.

Eyes widening, one hand balled into a fist. Forget smacking. She would just punch her in the face. "I want you to admit you screwed up by inviting Regina." Hell, she hadn't even wanted most of the others except Belle to come, but her insistent best friend turned it into a Jersey Devils reunion, six people accepting the invite. So Ruby had already been on thin ice. Adding Regina Mills to the mix had Emma desiring to strike the ice beneath Ruby's feet with the hand axe she had threatened Oliver with.

A slow nod produced Ruby appeared thoughtful. "Okay." She nodded again. "Now I _would_ admit that if it were true."

"What the fuck!"

To her credit Ruby neither flinched or winced at the volume of those three small words. "Emma," the therapeutic tone remaining, Ruby stood up, walked up to her and dared to clamp a hand on each tense shoulder, "you like her. So much."

What did that have to do with anything? Asking her Emma wanted to sneer at the soft smile curving Ruby's lips. What the hell was she smiling so serenely about? Why didn't she realize she had just created a problem of monumental proportions?

"Ruby," Emma stepped back far enough so that the other woman's hands were no longer upon her shoulders, "what're you talking about? Yeah, I like her. She's sweet, funny, nice…"

"Sexy...you wonder what it would be like to kiss her…"

"Sure." Emma blinked as it occurred to her what she had just agreed with. "No!" She shook her head. "What...why...what does my liking Regina have to do with anything? You just invited a lamb into a group of wolves."

"Pack."

"What?"

"A group of wolves is referred to as a pack."

Emma spent several seconds staring at her. "Why do you even know that?"

Ruby shrugged. "Pride myself on knowing a little bit of this and a little bit of that."

Rolling her eyes, Emma sighed. "This won't work. She can't come over here. Someone will say something."

"Emma," the therapist voice had made a comeback, "only you, me, Belle and Mulan know what happened that night. They've kept it to themselves all these years and as a precaution I texted, letting them know that Henry's mother was coincidentally your neighbor and friend who is joining us and they are to pretend they know nothing about a Henry Mills."

She wanted to slap that confident yet serene smile off her face. "Ruby, for the love of God, why in the hell did you invite her?"

Head cocked to the left Ruby regarded her as though she thought the answer to that should have been obvious. "Because I think you like her enough that eventually she will become very important to you. And since we're your friends it would be nice if one's friends and one's significant other were able to get along. So," the serene smile brightened, "tonight we begin and what happened in the past will remain in the past." She dared to place her hands on Emma's shoulders again. "Just relax. Nothing bad will happen."

Emma actually growled. "Great. You just jinxed us."

*********

Most would assume a house filled with nine women, good music and various foods including a platter of moist, decadent special brownies would be lively but quite the opposite was true. Those unaware of what happened the night Henry died played poker at the dining room table using pretzels as the chips. Mulan occupied a recliner, thumb flicking various areas of her phone screen in a bid to distract herself that Henry's mother sat ten feet away. Belle paced in front of a couple windows wishing that just for tonight she could take up smoking again. Emma, Regina and Ruby sat on the couch and loveseat, Emma dipping her millionth chip in the bowl of salsa on the coffee table between them while her neighbor who sat beside her quietly chatted with Ruby about movies, most of which she had never heard. A negative to being a decade long guest of the state.

Emma frowned. Actually there had few to zero positives. A millionth glance between Regina and Ruby she snatched another chip from the bag about to dip it when Ruby's eager clapping provided enough of a distraction she dropped it amongst the chunky, spicy contents.

Ruby jumped from the couch, hands on her hips as she scanned the room, her expression most displeased. "Okay, ladies, how old have we gotten that this is our idea of a party?" Not giving anyone the opportunity to respond she indicated Emma. "Our friend, our leader Emma 'Cygnus' Swan has returned to us and this is the welcome home celebration she gets? A bunch of thirty and forty somethings stuffing their faces and competing for pretzels?"

Eyes landing on the brownie platter she grinned. "I've only seen Trina and Kaylee partake of the brownies Regina and I so lovingly baked. Therefore," walking toward the platter Ruby picked it up, the grin upon her lips managing to triple in size, "it's time you all get baked." She turned in Belle's direction. "You first because you're about to wear a hole in Emma's carpet with all that walking. What? Is that watch you're wearing a Fitbit so you're trying to collect steps?"

Her only response a smirk Belle approached selecting a laced treat, which she sank her teeth into without hesitance. It wasn't nicotine but she supposed it would do.

*********

The brownies helped. Well actually they helped much more of the food to disappear when everyone minus Sarah (who abstained since she was breastfeeding) developed the munchies. The big pretzel poker game did end, a game of charades with two teams starting, which did liven the group along with a certain ingredient within the brownies. A couple hours after the game started one by one the ex Jersey Devils members began taking their leave until just Emma, Regina and Ruby remained, the latter pondering slipping out so they could be alone because in her opinion they just hadn't interacted enough tonight despite having mostly sat next to one another.

Was it insane having Regina Mills in their lives? Introducing her to their world? Perhaps...okay, definitely, but Ruby had a feeling the risk just might be worth it. Hands clapped yet more quietly than before she announced that she was about to take her leave ignoring her best friend's not so subtle head shake and pleading eyes begging her to remain.

Oh dear no. What kind of crazy-assed matchmaker would she be if she were to stick around as the third wheel? Jacket grabbed, she patted the bulge in a pocket while inwardly smirking. And also if she left without intentionally having snatched Regina's keys?

*********

On her hands and knees Emma once again searched underneath the dining room table still littered with snack food, empty beer and soda cans, a deck of cards and pretzel money. Eyes widened and lower lip bitten she looked under each cushion tied to each chair surrounding the oval table, though it made absolutely no sense that Regina's keys would be underneath there. Hell, in desperation she had thoroughly examined the freezer as well hoping against hope that the first time marijuana user at the height of her buzz may have tossed her keys in there wondering how well they would unlock a door when chilled.

Meanwhile, Regina had obviously given up, laid back on the couch with one bare foot raised near a corner of the coffee table while she sipped from a can of Coke as Emma observed just outside the kitchen. Now what were they going to do? She had already checked Regina's house. Damned woman had locked every freaking door and window plus set the alarm. She had only traveled next door. Why did she have to be so secure?

Deep in thought Emma wasn't certain how long her relaxed neighbor had been watching her, a pleasant little smile playing on her lips. Without her consent her hand lifted, two fingers sending the brunette a wave. God, now what? Unless Regina allowed her to break a window or pick a lock so she could hurry inside to disarm her system she was stuck with her for the duration of the night.

Emma wanted to smack herself due to her stomach flip flopping the moment Regina crooked a finger at her while whispering her name. Again without her consent her feet started moving and before she knew it Emma occupied the space on Regina's left, immediately striving to ignore the warm hand settled atop her thigh.

"Tell me something, Emma," a softened voice inquired.

_I'd like to tell you where your keys are. _"Like what?"

Pleasant smile remaining, Regina shrugged. "Anything. Say something about yourself I don't know."

_Your son is dead because of me. _A sharp breath pulled in Emma's eyes shut for a moment. She had to stop thinking such thoughts otherwise she might lose it. Might say something she didn't wish Regina to be privy to. The hand upon her thigh squeezed yanking her from stressful thoughts. She should truly move that hand. So petite, soft and delicate looking, perfectly trimmed nails shining with the aid of clear polish.

"Emma?"

Following rapid blinking Emma focused on her neighbor's faintly smiling face. "My favorite color is blue."

An eyebrow lifted along with her hand, the fingers curled in and she turned her hand so that she gave Emma a thumbs down sign. "Favorite color? Weaker than a newly born kitten."

If she hadn't been so worried Emma might have laughed at that. So she was being saucy tonight. Then again Regina had been rather saucy (and pissed) the evening they met. However this saucy was adorable, stained with amusement as the nurse's smile persisted. God, why did she have to be so cute?

_Cute?_ _You're losing it, Emma. _Nothing about this situation was cute. Being around Regina Mills caused her great anxiety and guilt to rapidly bubble to the surface. It also caused her skin to tingle, the desire to touch her neighbor's skin and wonder what her lips tasted like. So cute. Outstandingly beautiful actually. She could have been some grand marble sculpture poised in the middle of a water fountain surrounded by thousands of delicately fragranced flowers.

_The hell, Emma?_ The brownies. She would blame those frilly thoughts on the baked goods. Marble sculptures. Emma barely contained a scoff. Absolutely ridiculous.

This was bound to drive her insane. She should move. Like first thing in the morning. Yes, just pack her shit, rent a U-Haul and get the hell out of Dodge never to look back no matter how cute and marbly she deemed Regina. The thought of doing that, never seeing her again filled Emma with a different type of anxiety. Anxiety. Should she really be feeling that at the moment? It had been a long time since Emma ingested weed, but wasn't it intended to reduce anxiety? Then again she had only eaten a quarter of a perfectly cut square piece.

"You go first then," Emma murmured while breaking off another piece from the saucer containing two brownies someone placed on the coffee table. Hoping it would calm her down she popped it into her mouth.

The base of her head pressed against a couch pillow, fingers sifted through her hair as a pair of warm brown eyes studied the ceiling. "Every September," she started in a low yet audible voice, "my son and I would take a trip up to this orchard where we talk. Just talk and talk while picking apples, placing them in the basket we brought with us every year. It doesn't sound all that thrilling but we enjoyed ourselves."

Smile softening she turned her head to look at Emma watching her introduce another chocolaty piece to her mouth. "We'd bring our personally selected apples home, turn on some music and make such things like applesauce and apple pie while dancing around the kitchen. It was so much fun," she whispered. "Even as a teenager he'd still be into taking the trip. How many teenagers want to spend a weekend picking apples and baking with their mother?"

"Only the best ones," Emma whispered back, hoping there hadn't been too much emotion evident in the reply.

Smiling despite having to blink away tears Regina nodded. "My Henry was the best."

Emma also nodded. _Yes, he was._


	7. Monsters

"Hey, Emma?"

"Yeah, kid?" Pool cue gripped, she stood next to the table while studying it, wondering if she could sink that ball into that pocket? It might prove difficult but wasn't impossible. Bending over she lined up the cue, squinted one eye and prepared to strike until a question filtered to her brain. All balls untouched Emma stood up and looked across the table to her opponent. "Repeat that."

Not an ounce of hesitance in his voice he followed instruction. "When I'm eighteen will you let me sell for you?"

If she weren't so against physical child punishment Emma might have leapt across that pool table to beat him with her stick. "You do realize there's not a snowball's chance in hell of my saying yes, don't you?"

His face scrunched up. "Oh come on, Emma. I can do this!" A grin flashed. "Who wouldn't want to buy from this smooth as a baby's bottom handsome young face?"

"Henry," his name sounded like a growl, "I'm not making you a dealer."

"Why? You have an eighteen year old on your crew right now! I don't wanna do it forever. Just save for college. I know Mom has a college fund set up for me, but I wanna contribute."

"Listen," pool cue raised, she used its tip to lightly tap his upper chest, "don't you dare throw logic in my face, kid. Kaylee had a rough upbringing. Doesn't know who her father is, her mother only cares about vodka and clinging to one man after another, no other decent family to rely on...so she's here. I brought her into the Jersey Devil family because she had no other options. No money, nowhere else to turn, dropped out of high school in the ninth grade… Drug dealing isn't decent but it works for her. But you?" The pool cue tapped him again. "You're different. You have a stable home, a sharp brain and potential. Life hasn't beat you down and I'll be damned if I put you out on those streets selling.

"You want to save for your college education? That's great. Be a normal college bound student and get your ass a job." Noticing his smirk Emma grinned. "Flip burgers, deliver newspapers, wash cars...hell, you wanna sell something? Take that baby face to the mall and try to talk ladies into purchasing cologne." Henry's smirk grew prompting her to chuckle.

"Henry, you're better than that. Better than all this and I predict that you'll have an outstanding future without having even temporarily worked an illegal job. You got this and I'll do everything I can to help you get into the college of your choice." Months ago Emma started a college fund for him, its value close to ten thousand. Considering Henry was the closest she would ever be to having a child Emma thought putting a college fund together for him a wonderful idea. Of course she wouldn't tell him about it right now. It was important for Henry to develop a strong work ethic without knowing he had not one but two college funds to rely on.

"So I won't get the job?"

"Nope."

He laughed then shrugged. "Okay. If she found out Mom would kill me anyway."

"Yep. And I don't know her but then she'd probably do away with me too." Emma was about to return her concentration to the game when someone activated her doorbell. Cue stick placed on the table she went to her front door groaning in response to the face she saw. Just three days later and he was back.

Instead of opening the door Emma looked toward Henry as it occurred to her that she could smell the burgers on the grill. She pointed in the direction of the sliding glass doors leading to the backyard, relieved when Mulan chose that moment to come in. "Mulan, could you help Henry fix a plate outside?"

"I'm practically sixteen and you're just trying to get rid of me."

Emma ignored him. "Just take him back outside with you until I say otherwise."

Deciding not to ask questions Mulan nodded then looked toward Henry waving at him. "C'mon, almost sixteen year old dude. Help me carry these cases outside." She picked up one case of beer and indicated for him to grab the other. Another look toward Emma as the visitor knocked on the door Henry begrudgingly grabbed the case and followed Mulan out to the backyard where Belle and Ruby, the self appointed grill master were.

It wasn't until she opened the door Emma realized Killian had brought his girlfriend along, Ariel standing a couple feet behind, features clouded with worry. The father of her unborn baby on the other hand appeared pissed. _Fuck. _She was trying to have a nice Sunday evening barbecue with a few friends and then this dipshit had to show up. Considering Ariel was there Emma figured this visit had little to nothing to do with her snatching the bulk of Killian's customers.

"Good evening, Killian," Emma said, sounding more courteous than she felt. Though she attempted to make eye contact with Ariel the redhead found something appealing about her own shoes. "And Ariel." As though she hadn't heard her Ariel kept her eyes trained downward so she gave up and returned her attention to her business rival. "What do you want? I'd offer you a burger, but I don't like you well enough to even offer you one of the tiny seeds off a hamburger bun." Emma asked herself why she continued taunting him when she had a strong feeling she knew why he was there. Killian was an angry bull with a penchant for wearing mascara like he thought himself an 80's rockstar and she stood there waving a giant red cloth in his face.

The smile he produced clearly had 'fuck you' written all over it. "Anyone ever tell you you're a cunt?"

She pretended to ponder that question. "Why, sir, I do believe _you_ did just a few days ago." A smirk was on the brink of forming until Ariel looked up for a second and even in the low lighting Emma was able to see that her left eye was swollen shut. Just as her fingers brushed the light switch intending to illuminate her porch a low voice instructed her not to. Then she heard the undeniable click and released an inward sigh. _Fuck. _Her gun was upstairs in her bedroom closet.

"Take four steps back, Emma." A hand wrapped around Ariel's upper arm while the gun raised to point toward his rival, a silencer attached to the end of it. Once she complied he yanked Ariel inside along with him, using his foot to kick the door shut.

"So I thought about what you said the other day," Killian began in a conversational tone, "but was gonna let it go thinking you were full of shit 'cause there's no way my girl could want someone like you. But then," Ariel whimpered the moment his hand tightened around her arm, "I overheard her gabbing on the phone to a friend that she's so in love but it's with a woman." Another fuck you smile erupted. "Obviously you were telling the truth and this little twit admitted it, which was why I had to redecorate her face a bit."

It was very difficult to keep the glare at bay considering in that moment Emma wanted nothing more than to kill his ass. About to speak, her lips snapped shut after a warning not to unload speech unless asked. The gun flit between the two women. "Tell me, _Cygnus_," Killian sneered, "out of all the women in this city did you have to start fucking mine?"

Initially Emma assumed that a rhetorical question until Killian stared at her, waving the gun toward her face. Lips she hadn't realized had become dry licked, she reminded herself to be still, arms straight at her sides. She could attempt to bullshit him, lie that it should just happened or she hadn't realized they were together, but figured he would see right through that. "Because," she started, voice soft yet audible, "she was _your_ woman and it was just another way to stick it to you."

It happened so quickly. One moment Ariel stood in front of her, quiet tears creating tracks upon her face and in the next a bullet wedged into the base of her skull propelling her forward, Emma catching her. Lowered as gently as possible to the floor Emma cradled her face while helplessly watching the life drain out of her. Tears stinging her own eyes she stared into an unfocused pair.

"See what you caused, Cygnus? Ariel was having _my _baby, was _my _girlfriend and yet she loved you despite meaning nothing to you. You used her, and in her final moments you made that abundantly clear." Killian's jaw hardened as did his grip on the gun when Emma looked up at him, her hatred just as evident as his. "Stand up."

Emma failing to follow instruction, Killian used the butt of the gun to strike her forehead with such intensity it caused her to collapse, blood oozing through about an inch long laceration. Stalking toward the moaning woman curled into a fetal position a foot away from Ariel's body, Killian aimed the gun toward her head. "I said get the fuck up, you worthless cunt!"

"Emma!" Having managed to sneak away from his babysitters, Henry walked into the living room just in time to witness the pistol whipping and hurried to stand in front of his friend, alarmed dark eyes darting between Emma who was obviously in pain, Ariel, blood saturating the carpet beneath her head and Killian whose glare had shifted toward him, gun quick to follow.

"Move outta the way, son. This doesn't concern you."

Despite the slight tremble to his body Henry stood his ground, clammy palms rubbing along the sides of his jeans as he intentionally straightened his posture and solely focused on Killian. Even when he felt Emma's fingers brush the bottom of his pants leg, anguished voice begging him to go he remained watching her attacker, not commenting after Killian said Emma wasn't worth protecting.

A short chuckle erupted. "Cygnus, I gotta hand it to you. You certainly know how to weave a spell on people." A glance toward her, Killian noticed she attempted to roll to her knees, the blood from her cut having traveled to her chin. The gun pressed toward the middle of Henry's chest Killian appeared amused and impressed at the same time. "You got balls, son. You may look a little pale, but you got big balls to stand up to me and this gun filled with bullets to protect that dazed piece of shit."

Henry seemed to straighten his body even more. "The only piece of shit I see in this room is you." Those clammy, shaky hands formed fists. "And make that the last time you call me son."

Killian shrugged. "My apologies. Will never happen again."

The trigger pulled twice more, Henry lost his battle with gravity just as Emma regained hers. An agonizing scream cut through her daze, containing enough volume to alert the women in her backyard. By the time they entered the house Killan had bolted out the front door while Emma knelt next to Henry, her shirt pulled off and pressed to his chest. Breathing quickened, Henry stared toward the ceiling not responding when Emma called his name.

It all happened so quickly. Mulan and Belle nominated to stay behind to tend to Ariel, Ruby snatched her car keys and Emma picked up Henry racing out the front door toward her best friend's crimson Jeep.

Heart pounding in her ears she cradled the teenager while pressing her shirt to his chest and encouraged him to stay awake, to stay alive. His chest moved up and down, breathing coming in spurts as a glazed look came over him. His lips moved as though he intended to speak, but no words were capable of being produced. Meanwhile, Ruby had started the car and raced through the neighborhood toward a main street, tears filling her eyes as she listened to her friend plead with Henry to hold on.

They could view the hospital in the distance when Henry whispered the blonde's name. Right hand leaving the soaked shirt Emma cupped his cheek. "Hey, kid, I'm here," she thickly whispered, a lump having intruded her throat.

"Tell...her...tell Mom...love her. You too."

Hot tears pouring down her cheeks Emma shook her head. "No, kid. _You're _gonna tell her tha-Henry...Henry!" Screaming at Ruby to drive faster although she had been violating the speed limits since they left the house Emma scuffled to switch positions with Henry laying him on the seat.

A trickle of blood at the corner of his mouth she used her thumb to whisk it away before leaning in to provide mouth to mouth. Deep down she knew it wouldn't do it any good. That final gasp had been far too loud, Henry's entire body trembling, his eyes fixed upon the Jeep's roof. However, that didn't prevent her from trying until having parked in front of the ER entrance Ruby opened the back door and begged her to stop, tugging her away from him.

"He's gone," Ruby whispered continuing to tug until Emma allowed herself to be pulled from the vehicle.

"Oh God." Fingers stained with red combed through her hair Emma glanced between Henry, Ruby and the sliding glass doors leading into the hospital, which were quiet on that Sunday evening. Her name repeated until she focused enough to look toward her friend she stared at her.

"We need to...we should leave Henry here so someone will find and take him inside." Based on the expression she wore Ruby loathed saying it, but that didn't make it any less true. If they didn't leave before someone spotted them there would undoubtedly be a mountain of questions and accusations thrown their way.

More weight added to an already heavy heart, she watched Emma remove the limp body from her Jeep and carrying Henry toward the entrance, pausing when she reached the curb. A tender kiss delivered to his forehead Emma lowered to her knees and gently as possible placed him upon a grassy area.

This couldn't be real Emma thought to herself. An hour ago they were laughing, talking and playing pool both anticipating the meal being created in the backyard and now...that bastard Killian had ended his life for no reason. Henry had tried to protect her and ended up paying the ultimate price. Fresh tears forming she slowly shook her head. If he hadn't been there, if she hadn't encouraged him to remain in her life, if she hadn't deliberately slept with Ariel and just as deliberately taunted Killian with it, none of this would have happened. Most certainly it was his fault, but she had to shoulder some of the blame. She hadn't pulled the trigger yet felt responsible for the bullets.

"Emma," Ruby softly called, now standing at the front of the car, the headlights making it easy for her to see Emma caressing Henry's ashen cheek, "we gotta get outta here. I hear an ambulance in the distance."

Though she acknowledged her with a brief nod Emma didn't speak a word nor did she rush to rise to her feet. Fingers grazing the wooden ladybug charm her father created for her she made a quick decision. The thin, black rope it was attached to removed from around her neck she placed it over Henry's head, carefully laying the pendant upon his chest. It was supposed to represent good luck, safety and protection. Too late but she wanted him to have it any way. Fingers swiped a face damp from both tears and perspiration. Maybe it would lead Henry to Emmett in Heaven.

Head lowered, lips brushed his forehead again a second before she whispered, "I love you, Henry."

*********

Running her tongue over teeth smooth, minty and cool from a vigorous brushing, Emma had just settled into bed and flipped on the television when a knock upon her door caused a low groan. Oh God, what could she want? Fifteen minutes ago Emma showed her the guest room, gave her towels and toiletries and told her to feel free to raid the kitchen. A deep sigh emitted she called out for Regina to come in just as a notification reached her ears. That was Ruby's text message tone. And what the hell did _she_ want?

Supremely irritated, Emma snatched the charging phone from the nightstand as Regina entered the bedroom, merely dressed in boyshort underwear and a borrowed T-shirt. Trying not to swallow her tongue Emma could have sworn she put a pair of pajama bottoms underneath that shirt when she handed the folded items to her unexpected guest. Was Regina hot? _Oh yes._

_Shut up, Emma._

Indicating for her to hang on, Emma unlocked her phone to read Ruby's message a scowl shortly to form. _Oops. Forgotten I'd put Reggie's keys in my jacket pocket. My bad. Will bring them by 'round 10 tomorrow. Nighty night!_

Mentally writing on a yellow Post-It to remind herself to end Ruby's life, Emma mentally folded and tucked the small sheet into her memory bank, shot off a quick threatening response with a certain vulgar word Siri attempted to autocorrect to Ruby then returned her attention to the half-dressed woman standing just two feet inside her bedroom. Yes, she would kill Ruby if Regina didn't kill _her_ first.

"Hey...you. What's up?" Emma managed to return the phone to the nightstand without taking her eyes off Regina. Of course they may have been frozen. She blinked. No, not quite yet.

Playing with her fingers, dark eyes glanced between Emma's face and the empty side of her bed. "I...I have a body pillow," Regina murmured.

Emma blinked. "Oh. Okay." What an odd thing to proclaim out the blue. Was she missing something? Had they discussed pillows earlier in the evening and the pot brownies caused her to forget it?

Throat cleared followed by a sigh Regina awkwardly stood while still playing with her fingers. "Cuddling with it is how I tend to end my days," she quietly spoke, cheeks growing warm with the admittance. Regina could hardly believe she was revealing this, but try as she had and as comfortable as the brand new guest bed had been she couldn't fall asleep. After tossing and turning for the thousandth time she found herself headed in the direction of Emma's room without fully knowing what she intended to say or ask.

"Oh." A blonde head bobbed up and down in slow motion. "Okay." Emma had the strong impression she was supposed to pick up what Regina had just laid on the table, but she didn't possess a clue.

Regina tried another clearing of throat in preparation for further speech although a small part of her thought about telling her hostess never mind, wishing her a good night and turning around to return to her room. "I...can't...don't sleep well without it."

"O...kay…?" What? Did she want her to go buy another body pillow or break into her house for that one? _And if I broke in she could just stay-wait. _Feeling like the subject of a blonde joke Emma unleashed a low groan. Damn, she felt stupid. Pushing that aside she leaned toward the other side of the bed, patting it while watching Regina. "You wanna stay with me tonight?" Wait again. Cuddling? Shit, did she want to touch as well? Emma had never been good at that level of intimacy, making it clear soon after orgasms were achieved if you stayed the night you shifted toward your side of the bed, leaving ample space between. Ten years in prison hadn't softened the preferred method.

Relief flooding her face, a dark head bobbed. "If you wouldn't mind. Know I'm a grown woman but—"

"Regina," she interrupted, patting the empty space again, "just park it over here."

Of course she didn't quite listen. Although Regina did shortly occupy the space, which provided ample space between their bodies within a couple seconds she slid over not stopping until a leg greeted Emma's underneath the covers. A heavy sigh slicing through the quiet night air Emma turned off the television, the lamp and scooted down to lay next to her unexpected bedmate, both on their backs, a smooth, soft leg pressed to hers.

Grateful for the next few minutes of silence, Emma had just decided it was safe to drift off when Regina released that sigh—the sigh which signals a person is about to unload their thoughts. _Shit._

"When I was seven years old," Regina softly began, staring toward the ceiling, fingers linked upon her stomach, "had a nightmare that a monster broke into my house and ate my parents and my little sister while I had to watch. Awoke with a pounding heart and sweat stained sheets wrapped around me.

"Got up, left my room and hurried toward my parents room, which was on the opposite end of a very long hall inside this ridiculously large house, too big for only four people. Dad was of course on another business trip so took his spot. The moment my hand brushed her side my mother bolted awake, fumbled for the light, whipped off her sleep mask and demanded to know what I called myself doing.

"I told her what happened, she frowned and told me I was being ridiculous. Monsters were a mere fabrication created by a weak mind."

Emma sent the ceiling a frown. She couldn't imagine her own mother saying something like that to her. "Your—she said that to you? A seven year old?"

The base of her head pressed to the pillow Regina nodded. "Regardless of your age she didn't believe in holding back."

The word bitch roaming through her brain Emma hesitantly inquired what happened next. Her blood began to boil when Regina explained how she had been given a pillow and blanket and led into the library downstairs. Cora, her mother referred to it as an exercise. Regina was to sleep in the library by herself until she realized monsters were a figment of her imagination.

"And I hated that library. We didn't have any books someone my age would like. Just a bunch of old, pretentious smelly books my parents probably didn't crack one spine. Not only that it was dark in there despite the stained glass windows—which were creepy. I've seen peaceful religious ones, landscapes, floral...these were pieces of colorful glass arranged into macabre images like one guy plunging a long sword into the chest of another. The window next to it showed a woman wearing a flowing dress and flowers in her hair, a noose around her neck as she prepared to jump from a kitchen chair."

"Damn." Though some light peeked through the blinds it was still too dark within the room for Regina to witness widened eyes. "Your parents are...different."

"My mother is a psychotic bitch who thinks death is a fascinating journey following life. She would have made a perfect mass murderer, but alas I'm certain she's only killed or attempted to kill souls." Regina emitted an audible breath, fingers lightly drumming upon her stomach over the borrowed shirt. "Like she attempted when I was seven. Eleven nights I was forced to stay in that library. So dark and cold...statues and figurines of several sizes surrounding me, the trees outside those creepy stained glass windows creating shadows along the walls, branches scraping whenever the wind picked up... I was a terrified mess, but I stayed because she made me and after a week and a half Cora decided I had conquered my fear well enough so she allowed me to return to my room."

"Had you?" Emma inquired in the softest tone she possessed.

"No," Regina responded following three seconds worth of thought. "Just learned to conceal it better."

Although she didn't wish to return there, even in her head Emma couldn't help but think of the weeks she spent in solitary. A small, rectangular space barely roomy enough to take a few steps and containing nothing but a creaky cot and a metal toilet with a sink attached. The only positive was that Felice couldn't get to her. Other than that those weeks felt like years and several times Emma felt close to snapping, her most stimulating activity involved using a thumbnail to scrape at the cheap paint covering the brick walls.

"I'm so sorry, Regina. You didn't deserve that. Your dad…?"

"He didn't participate in the emotional abuse. Kind and loving when he was there but always seemed to be working. I'd ask and she'd say he was earning a living. However, one day—think I was twelve— spotted him outside a hotel kissing this woman as they waited for the valet." Regina paused to sigh. "Wasn't even angry about it. Don't blame him for needing an escape, for seeking warmth elsewhere because his wife had all the warmth of a deep freezer.

"Standing across the street, I studied them for a minute, wishing I had another mother to cheat on Cora with." Regina sounded on the brink of bursting into tears when she said, "Four decades I've known that woman and she has never hugged me, never kissed the pain away from an owie, never held me until I fell asleep." Throat having tightened Regina took a couple deep swallows, hating the prickling sensation in her eyes. It had been so long since she shed a tear over Cora and if she broke her record now she would simply blame it on the brownies. Apparently weed made her weepy.

"Even at my son's funeral," she whispered. "No hug, but she did try to cheer me up by saying that since his was an illegitimate soul it was for the best because he never should have been born in the first place."

Reminding herself of a Jack-in-the-box Emma sprang into a seated position, blazing emeralds focused on the other woman's face. "She said that about Henry?" It was a good thing Emma didn't have a clue where Cora lived, otherwise she may have been tempted to get dressed and grab her keys. Too late she realized she had uttered his name with too much familiarity, but fortunately, Regina hadn't seemed to notice.

"She did," Regina softly replied. "What's sad is I wasn't even shocked. I was plenty pissed though. Despite being in church, cussed her out and my sister had to physically hold me back from smacking her." A brief pause she added, "That was the last time I saw her."

"Your mother?"

"Yeah, saw Margaret last week."

"Are you two close?"

For the first time since joining her in bed Regina smiled. "Like two peas in a pod. We helped one another get through those years with our mother." Too soon the smile faded, a frown forming upon her brow. "Well...until I ended up pregnant at fifteen with a twenty-two year old boyfriend who couldn't flee fast enough once I told him about the baby." Clutching two fistfuls of sheet Regina focused on the ceiling. "Then I told Cora and she kicked me out of the house, which left my twelve year old sister alone. I hated her for kicking me out but even more because it split Maggie and I up. Saw her from time to time but we didn't really reconnect until she graduated high school and went to college.

"Don't think it a coincidence our father died soon after Maggie moved out. To this day I'm convinced he intentionally had that massive stroke to get away from Cora. So yeah, I still believe in monsters; my own mother is proof they exist."

_Or the bitch intentionally gave him one. _Emma debated whether to make the thought known until quiet crying reached her ears. "Hey," she whispered, turning on her left side to face Regina. What are these about, hmm?" Had she mentioned having an aversion to someone crying? Crying, deep conversation and cuddling were Emma's turnoffs yet that didn't stop her from cupping a moistened face, her thumb gently stroking back and forth to wipe at several tears.

Eyes tightly shut as though in a bid to prevent further tears it took her multiple attempts to push the shaky words out her mouth. "My family is so broken. And Henry," voice cracking, haunted dark, glistening eyes opened unleashing another wave, "he made it whole for almost sixteen years. My most precious gift. I'm grateful for Maggie, David, my awesome brother-in-law and their three kids. I love them so much, but still feel lost without him." And with those words that wave upgraded to a flood.

Emma told herself she wasn't qualified for it while she scooted closer to Regina and despite the fear attempting to wrap its chilly tendrils around her she managed to scoop the smaller woman into her arms, holding her tight and even occasionally planting a tender kiss on the top of her head. Emma hadn't thought she could despise herself any more, yet tonight proved her wrong. Guilt and trepidation warred for space in her brain as something Regina said not too long ago replayed. _I still believe in monsters; my own mother is proof they exist._

Little did Regina know she was currently in bed with another.


	8. So Far, So Good

Blood red, vacant eyes stared back at her through the rearview mirror. The last time she felt this empty had taken place on the day her parents died. She never planned on feeling that way again, but there she was seated behind the wheel of her car in black attire a silver flask upon her right thigh and a Smith & Wesson on her left as she berated herself for the umpteenth time for being so selfish and reckless. Look what it had cost so many people including herself. She tried to block the image of his mother as she stood at the pulpit talking about him, even sharing a funny story until finally she broke down so severely she doubled over, several running to her aid.

Emma almost bolted then, but convinced herself to remain seated in a pew toward the rear of the church until the funeral had concluded. Deciding to forego the graveside service she issued a prayer and left, twenty minutes later pulling up to the curb of the two-story home. Those reddened eyes narrowed as they surveyed that house. It looked quaint enough but she loathed that house and the person who lived within its walls.

Snatching up the flask Emma removed its cap just long enough to take a small sip-her first and last. Flask tossed on the passenger seat she sent an apology to the interior of her vehicle, grabbed her handgun and emerged. Long-sleeved dress shirt freed from the waistband of her slacks she tucked the gun behind and arranged the shirt over it to cover. Door shut and keys pocketed she strutted toward the front door and rang the bell. Maybe he would notice it was her and refuse to answer. Perhaps climb out a back window.

"Cygnus!" Or maybe he would be enough of an imbecile to actually open the door after what he had done a few days prior, a broad smile on his lips. "To what do I owe the displeasure of this visit?"

Emma yearned to whip out the handgun and shoot him straight between the eyes, but no, that would be too easy. She encouraged herself to take a deep calming breath. "We need to talk."

Killian looked behind her and up and down the street. "Doesn't look like you brought the police or your pussy posse with you, so what do you want? Tell me and get the hell off my property before I finish you."

So she refrained from shooting him between the eyes, but Emma did aim a hearty kick between his thighs. Upon impact his eyes bulged, his face began to redden and as she took a couple steps backward his knees crumpled, hands shifting to protect an already injured crotch. Smith & Wesson made their debut when Emma spotted a man not much older than Killian approaching the door as he reached for the gun tucked into his duty belt.

"Don't even think about it, Officer Jones." Instead of pointing her weapon toward the officer she'd known to be sullied for quite a while she aimed toward his moaning brother's head. "Take that belt off and toss it on the floor unless you want to be responsible for another hole in his head. Lord knows your little bro is already dumber than a box of rocks." Despite offering her a glare he followed instruction, the duty belt striking the floor with a loud thump. However, when he didn't comply within three seconds of being told to go sit on the couch a bullet to his knee had the officer meeting the floor quicker than Killian.

His groans and insults ignored Emma refocused her attention on Killian. Since he seemed intent on rising she shoved her foot at his upper chest, continuing until he didn't have any choice but to lay back. Of course the gun pointed at his head was a strong motivator. Higher her booted foot climbed until its sole pressed into the front of his neck, lowering its pressure when it was obvious he struggled to breathe.

"Did you honestly think I wouldn't come for you?" Emma inquired, her voice both low and somber. "You killed one of the most important people to me, a good and decent young man and then expect to carry on with your life as usual?" She blinked away tears while her hand tightened around the gun. "They're about to lower him into the ground. Henry's life is over because you're a fucking evil bastard."

Although a bark of laughter pushed from his lips there was shakiness attached to it. "Now don't forget your part, Cygnus. You carried on an affair with my pregnant girlfriend then bragged about it. I wanted to make you hurt and if those bits of water within your eyes are any indication I was successful." Killian dared to grin. "Remember I'm not the only bastard here."

She pulled the trigger although it was nowhere near a fatal shot. Just a graze to an upper arm, which effectively distracted Killian long enough for Emma to lean over, loosen his belt and pants and tug them down along with his underwear down to his knees. Ignoring his profanity laced inquiry as to what she was doing, she switched out the gun for a pocket knife, its blade gleaming once she flicked it open. Knelt next to the man until he attempted to squirm away, Emma hurriedly shifted to straddle his thighs watching him wince when the cool weapon grazed an inner thigh.

His brother told none too pleasantly to shut up after he demanded she leave Killian alone, she sent the pinned man an icy smile as the tip of the blade strolled toward his private area, leaving a thin white line in its wake. "Remember when you mentioned to Henry that he sported big balls for standing up to you?"

Sweat shining along his forehead, a few drops escaping onto his temples Killian offered a quick nod. He intended to confirm with speech until pain registered. The moment he tried bucking her off Emma placed more weight upon his body, fingers curling around the front of his throat and squeezing to gain his attention, frightened light eyes meeting hers.

"Henry died with his balls and now you'll live without yours." Although Killian's cries were more panicked both men begged her to stop, but she refused to listen. For the thousandth time Henry's limp, pale, blood soaked body popped into her head along with the brand new image of him forever tucked inside a cerulean coffin wearing a sharp suit that would've been perfect for prom.

Warm, sticky liquid upon her hands and Killian's agonizing screams giving her a headache Emma continued working the blade until they rested in her palm.

He passed out before she could stand dropping his mutilated scrotum on the carpet on her way to the cordless phone standing in its base. Expression neutral she punched in a short number while continuing to ignore the officer. The conversation with the local police department didn't take long. Just long enough for Emma to give them Killian's address, state her full name and what she had just done to him and his brother and yes, she would be waiting for their arrival.

Phone returned to the base Emma casually made her way over to a beverage cart reaching for the heavy decanter that contained a deep brown liquid. An inch worth of the liquid poured into a short glass she settled in the recliner facing the pained brothers. Glancing between the pair she winked then took a sip, a short moan soon to follow.

"That's a mighty fine brandy, Killian." She raised the glass to him. "Thanks for making my last alcohol sampling for what I suspect will be a long while a good one."

Despite his hand shaking he managed to raise it high enough for Emma to see the saluting middle finger. She laughed, saluting his saturated crotch. "Don't think you'll be into doing that for a while. Hell, maybe never if Little Killian refuses to rise without the help of his two best friends."

"You're a bitch," he stuttered.

A sigh emitted Emma pulled in a deep swallow and sank back into the recliner. "You killed the only child you'll ever have, your girlfriend and an innocent boy. In retaliation I just removed your testicles and non-seriously shot you and your brother and yet I'm certain I'm the only one who is going to be arrested today.

"I'm not saying a word about the real reason I did this to you so you should be thanking me instead of calling me names, No Balls Jones. Your manhood took a severe hit yet you still got your freedom. You're welcome." The glass drained Emma rested it upon the arm of the recliner while returning that hardened stare. She recognized that look. Hatred. The feeling was quite mutual. If emotions could be visible amongst the human body the word hatred would currently be tattooed into every inch of her skin. She just hadn't decided how much was meant for Killian and how much was geared toward herself.

*********

Regina Mills was not her girlfriend regardless of the constant teasing from her best friend Ruby. So what if they had exchanged phone numbers and hadn't missed a day where they exchanged text messages. So what if one could be found at the other one's house just about every day. So what if they usually ate dinner together. So what if sometimes Regina abandoned her body pillow in favor of snuggling throughout the night with Emma who had decided she didn't mind, _really_ didn't mind sleeping with her arms wrapped around the petite nurse? So what if some nights she was the one to ask if Regina wanted to snuggle in bed and watch Hulu or Netflix until they fell asleep? So what if Emma had abruptly stopped by the hospital a time or five to bring Regina a hearty lunch? So what if she hadn't shown interest in any other woman in the almost three months she had been out of prison?

It didn't mean anything. Absolutely none of it. Nor was it relevant that for the last couple weeks she had been working on a birthday present for her neighbor, friend and snuggle buddy. Emma's business had been steadily growing but to date no project meant as much to her as this one. Such intricacy in the wooden piece she had sworn more times than she cared to recall and bandaged a few paper cuts but it had all been worth it. Well it would be if Regina liked her present.

Having decided today that it was complete Emma softly smiled while placing the piece inside a pre-decorated box. She would find out tomorrow. With Regina's birthday falling on a Saturday it was her day off so perhaps Emma could surprise her with breakfast in bed. Pancakes, the fluffiest egg—

"You must be Emma."

Although her heart had been on the brink of leaping from her chest Emma prevented alarm from showing on her face. Instead she looked rather quizzically toward the brunette she recognized as Regina's younger sister. They had never met but she remembered her from the photographs as Regina spoke about her with such pride and love evident.

"I am." Hoping she hadn't seen the homemade gift for her sibling Emma settled a lid with a giant purple bow attached atop the box. "Though that doesn't actually _have_ to be my name." She displayed a smile though the other woman obviously didn't see a reason to return it, instead walking further into the garage curious eyes checking out its contents, paying extra attention to the festive box atop a folding table in front of the blonde. Emma was surprised when she held out a hand while introducing herself as Regina's sister Margaret.

Following a brief shake Emma pointing toward herself. "As you know my name is Emma and I'm Regina's neighbor."

"And…?"

Those eyes repeatedly traveling the length of her Emma felt like she had just been undressed and scrutinized. Though not in a sexual way. More like she kept beeping at the security checkpoint inside an airport so had been taken to a private room for a more thorough inspection by a supremely professional TSA employee.

Emma's brow furrowed. "And?"

Margaret nodded. "Yes." A straight chisel plucked from the table her thumb stroked along its smooth wooden handle as she studied the other woman. "What else are you to my sister, Emma?"

God, the way she pronounced her name and gazed at her with such intensity made Emma feel like she was back in school. Then again already knowing Margaret was a high school teacher may have had something to do with that. "Um, her friend." She wouldn't have been too surprised if the word bullshit appeared in a thought bubble above Margaret's head.

"Is that right?"

Was it hot in there? Her clothes seemed to suddenly be sticking to her body. Had Regina said or done something to make her thing otherwise? Like something was going on between them above friendship? "Margaret, I-"

"Regina mentioned you moved here a few months ago and prior to being here you were...away. She wouldn't tell me what away meant so I surmise either you worked undercover somewhere, you've been someone's hostage or you've spent time in prison so which is it?"

Yes, her clothes were definitely sticking. Blunt with her inquiries and did this woman ever blink? She must have scared the shit out of her students. And yet Margaret possessed such an adorable cherubic face and had a warm smile that could light up a room. Emma had yet to see that smile up close and personal, but she was aware from photos that it existed.

"Prison," Emma murmured, some part of her wondering if Margaret yearned to send her to the principal's office. Asked why she had spent time in prison she shrugged. "Assault." She expected to next be asked why she had committed assault so was rendered quite surprised when the teacher instead inquired if the person or people she had assaulted deserved it. Over the years Emma asked herself numerous times if she regretted what she did and her internal response never wavered. "Yes, they did. To be honest, if I could go back in time to change what I did I wouldn't change a thing." Margaret stared at her until she was on the brink of fidgeting. Emma breathed a tiny relieved sigh when she blinked and looked away for a moment.

"Something about you seems so familiar, Emma. Yet I'm certain we've never met."

The funeral. The moment Regina shared a picture of her sister Emma remembered her from the day Henry had been put to rest. She had been crying yet not uncontrollably. A quiet cry, her eyes swollen and red when they connected for a mere two seconds. Emma recalled the pain in that cherubic face as she tried to be strong for the slightly older woman she continuously put an arm around. Her big sister.

Emma shrugged again. "Guess I just have one of those faces." The unblinking stare resurfaced but thankfully it didn't last long this time.

"Regina's birthday is tomorrow."

"I'm aware."

"You have anything planned?"

_She's not my girlfriend._ "No."

Margaret indicated the box. "What's that?"

"A box with a bow on it."

The teacher smirked though there did seem to be a hint of amusement present. "Obviously, but what is _inside_ the box?"

Hands planted upon her hips Emma proved she also knew how to stare. "Anyone ever tell you that you have nose trouble?"

"Yes, but I take prescription allergy medication for it." She managed to maintain a serious expression until Emma's laughter infected her. A broad grin emerging Margaret shifted closer, hand lightly smacking the other woman's upper arm. "So far, so good, Emma. What's on your agenda for tomorrow?"

So far, so good what? "Um, have a toy chest I'm working on for a client."

"Would it be possible to take tomorrow off?"

Alarm bells went off in Emma's head. Some part of her encouraged her to lie, claim that she absolutely had to finish that project by tomorrow but she had a feeling Margaret would be capable of picking up on her bullshit. So with a barely audible sigh she nodded, alarm heightening when the teacher smiled oh so brightly, hazel eyes twinkling.

"Wait." Some of the twinkling faded as she clutched Emma's upper arm. "Tell me you're allowed to leave this city."

Those bells were deafening. _She wants to take you somewhere. Lie, bitch, lie! _"I'm not on probation." _Dumbass._

"Splendid!" The twinkle returned full force. "Girls trip. You, Regina and I. I predict we're going to have fun this weekend, Emma." Her arm released Margaret lightly tapped a side of the box while smirking. "Make sure you bring this mysterious package."

*********

It all happened so quickly. One moment she had been minding her own business in her own garage and the next this pixie drifted by determined to whisk her off to New York City for the weekend. Yes, somehow, _would it be possible to take tomorrow off_ turned into a road trip Emma wouldn't be free from until they drove back to New Jersey on Monday because unbeknownst to Regina her busy little sister had gone behind her back and secured the day off with her boss.

Regina didn't have a clue about Margaret's true plan. The plan she had been given a few weeks ago involved going to her sister's house for a birthday dinner. Surprised she was not only to open the front door and find her sister standing there demanding she go pack for a birthday weekend in NYC but that a semi uncomfortable looking Emma stood next to her clutching a large duffel bag.

Deciding there was safety in numbers Emma texted Ruby then informed Margaret a friend of hers would be joining them, relieved when she didn't seem to have a problem with that. Ruby must have already been packed because it didn't take long for her to ring Regina's doorbell, reddened lips curved into the widest grin. It had been too long since she had been into the city and she was ready to party. Wearing a similar grin Margaret agreed with her-she loved her hubby and the kids but it was wonderful to get away for a few days. Regina and Emma on the other hand looked as though they were attempting to strengthen themselves in preparation for a trip to the dentist.

They sat in the second row of the teacher's SUV exchanging a bit of light conversation here and there while Margaret and Ruby took turns talking everyone's ears off. It was actually quite fascinating watching them bounce topics back and forth like two professionals on the court at Wimbledon. They played so well off each other one might have suspected they had been friends for twenty years rather than twenty minutes.

Regina and Emma would consider themselves verbally matched as well, but both were stressed over the trip. Perhaps because Emma had been relentlessly teased by the woman with the painted lips seated in the passenger seat about Regina and Regina had been much more subtlety teased by the driver concerning Emma. Perhaps their stress was in part due to the fact that each had developed feelings for the other and they hadn't a clue what would or wouldn't happen over the weekend.

Margaret had gone all out, purchasing a two bedroom suite that afforded a terrific view of Central Park. Of course now that a trip for two had switched to four people someone would either have to occupy the couches, cots would have to be sent to their room or they could be sleep buddies. Coining the phrase, Ruby thought it would be best for Emma and Regina to occupy one of the bedrooms since they frequently snuggled and slept together anyway. Attempting to burn a hole in the back of her head Emma desired to kill her best friend for spilling something that had been told in confidence.

A forty-six mile journey concluded when they pulled up to the valet, Margaret checked them in and once they entered their suite she casually mentioned that she and Ruby would take the room to the left of the living area while her sister and Emma could have the room affording the best view of the park. Everyone get their belongings situated and freshened up then they could walk across the street to a restaurant she researched online that turned out to have incredible reviews. By the way, since dinner was on her no one was allowed to bring their wallet. A flash of a smile and a brief clapping of her hands and she headed toward she and Ruby's bedroom with wheeled luggage in tow while everyone stared after her. Was Margaret truly a teacher or a drill sergeant?

Each bedroom having its own bathroom, Emma sat on the end of the bed pretending to read a room service menu though she really only had eyes for the brunette standing at the sink running a comb through lustrous, soft-hair. She was just combing brown hair. Emma frowned. _Her damn lustrous, soft hair that feels so good wrapped around my fingers._ The groan was loud enough for Regina to hear, comb paused midway to her head as she turned to regard her friend.

"You okay, Emma?"

Gaze shifted toward the plush carpet near her feet Emma answered with a tight nod. She sharply inhaled following Regina's quiet approach, hands landing on the tops of her thighs as she sank to her knees in front of her. First making eye contact she softly smiled.

"You nervous about being here?"

Emma shook her head. "Nah, I've been to the city many times. I mean, it's been ten—" It's possible the pair of warm fingers pressed to her mouth may have aided in her forgetting how to breathe for a moment.

"I meant about being here with me." Fingers removed the entire hand returned to Emma's left thigh.

Voice unintentionally softened she replied, "Why would I?" Emma cleared her throat hoping doing so would help her to be more audible. "I mean I'm with you in Pommerton all the time." She glanced toward the king-sized bed. "In a bed even."

"Right." Regina slowly bobbed her head. "But something seems different. Like a...possibility," she finished in a whisper.

"For?"

A faint smile forming she squeezed the thighs underneath her fingers and stood up. Emma's face cupped she leaned in, soft, warm lips pressing to her forehead. "Anything, Emma."

And with that broad response she returned to the bathroom and her comb. Emma tried not to resume staring as a single word kept roaming through her chaotic brain.

_Shit._


	9. Eyes Don't Speak

"Wanna know what I think?" Slid into the booth next to her so close their thighs pressed she smiled, cheeks all aglow from the alcohol. A break required she had switched to water, fingers wrapped around the bottle.

"Not really," her companion murmured, raising a short glass to her lips for a tiny sip. It was her first and would be her last because she didn't want to risk being even the slightest bit inebriated around Regina.

Ruby laughed. "Oh, c'mon. You know I'm wise as an owl."

Emma glanced toward her beverage wondering if she could have poured vodka into the bottle. "Maybe a drunken one."

With the smile persisting, her best friend chose to ignore her reply. "I think you like her. Like a lot. Like so much you might be somersaulting into a pool of love."

Though inside she was the opposite of calm Emma sounded dry when she said, "Ruby, you've had enough adult juice for the evening." A hand clutched her thigh under the table.

"Don't be afraid of your feelings, to act on them."

Although her voice had softened Emma had little trouble hearing her despite the music blasting within the gay nightclub the only straight person in their group suggested they visit once dinner concluded. Emma glanced around to ascertain the sisters weren't approaching their booth before her attention returned to Ruby.

"There isn't anything to be afraid of because I don't have any feelings for Regina."

Ruby rolled her eyes. "You mean you don't _want _to."

Would it be so wrong if she punched her? Maybe a light slap across Ruby's rosy face? "She's my friend. That's all."

"And your snuggle buddy."

"Ruby, mind your own business," Emma suggested, a warning having leaked into her tone.

Again she ignored. "You've been out for months and you still haven't gotten laid. Me thinks you're waiting for someone in particular."

"Regina and I are just friends and friends is all we will ever be." Her palms slapped the table for emphasis. "Anything else is not on the menu."

"On the menu?" Twin dark brows lifted. "Oh okay. So you didn't order anything but friendship but that doesn't mean you can't signal for the waitress to return to make another selection. A more...satisfying entree."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You're the one who started the restaurant speak!"

Emma shook her head. "Whatever. The point is I will never get involved with Regina. I'm surprised we can even be friends considering, but we're making it work. More than that?" She sighed. "I don't deserve it." Hell, she didn't even feel deserving of Regina's friendship but that didn't prevent her from holding on tightly to it with both hands.

"Who says?"

"Me."

"You're a dumbass."

She glared. "Shut up, Ruby."

"Wow. That's an incredible comeback. I'm shocked it only took you all of a second to create it." A heightened glare ignored Ruby wrapped an arm around her friend's tense shoulders. "Listen, Em, you deserve to be happy. For ten years you punished yourself and now it's time to forgive. You'll never forget-nor should you-but it truly is time to...let him rest," she gently spoke. "Henry is okay. He's at peace and so should his mother and you." Ruby offered a small squeeze. "He would want that and you two together? I honestly think that would please him because he loved you both more than anything and if you could find love, happiness with one another then that's the icing on the cake." She chuckled in response to a lifted brow. "Just a coincidence. Wasn't adding on to the restaurant analogy."

*********

"So." She intentionally bumped hips with the woman stood beside her after they joined the long line for the restroom.

Regina almost groaned quite familiar with that so. Such a tiny word yet her sister managed to pack much within it. "What?"

"What exactly are you and the ex-con doing?"

The groan came close to arriving. "Her name is Emma."

"I'm sorry." A grin brought her lips upward. "Same question applies though."

Was her shrug casual enough? Regina sincerely hoped so. "Nothing. We're friends."

"Who sleep in the same bed?"

Regina felt her face heat up as the woman in front of them turned around to flash a knowing grin. Once she resumed facing ahead Regina flashed her also grinning sibling a frown. "Could you speak any louder?"

"Probably."

"Maggie, I'm going to kill you."

"Fine but you do realize you're my kids godmother? All four of them and I have a feeling my grieving spouse will be leaning on you quite heavily unless the police figure out you're the reason for my demise."

She loved her nieces and nephews but the twins alone were a handful. "Fine. I'll just knock you around a bit."

Margaret laughed yet swiftly sobered as she reached for the other woman's hand offering a gentle squeeze. "Reg, you deserve to be happy and Emma seems to bring that out in you. Do I like that she's," her voice reduced to a whisper, "been to prison? No, but I sense she's a good person and she adores you."

"We're friends." Regina hated that she had said anything in the first place. The first time she mentioned her neighbor she could practically hear her sister's interest pique on the phone. Today she proved just how much of a busybody she could be by inviting a woman she had known two seconds on a weekend vacation. "Emma wants to be my friend."

Margaret appeared unconvinced. "That's not what her eyes told me."

Regina smirked as they advanced an inch. At the rate this line was moving it might have been quicker to walk across the street to their hotel to use the bathroom. "Eyes don't speak."

"Really? Because Emma's clearly told me she adores you and she wants to be on that booty."

"Maggie!" She needed an ice pack. No, she required two of them, one for each cheek. The facial ones. Regina wagged a finger in that deceptively innocent face. "Knock it off. You don't know what you're talking about."

"The heck I don't. I'm surprised she was able to clean her plate, because throughout dinner she kept staring at you every time you spoke. It's like she hung on your every word. Like she required them to live and each syllable out your mouth allowed oxygen into her lungs." Margaret chuckled following her sister's eyeroll. "I'm serious. I mean she listened to Ruby and I, but there was a different, affectionate gaze each time you had something to say. Even when you laughed Emma seemed attentive."

Regina tried not show how pleased she was by that information-if it turned out to be valid. She was confident Emma liked her, but did she like her like _that_? God, she sounded like a teenager with a crush on the head cheerleader. No. No, Emma Swan wouldn't be caught dead shaking pom poms. She would most likely be the quiet loner chick who wore a black leather jacket and drove a motorcycle. If you left her alone she would leave you alone, but if you crossed the line she wouldn't hesitate to rearrange your face. Teenage loner Emma was also book smart. "And the other thing?"

"Pertaining to your booty?" Margaret chuckled when playfully shoved. "She kept staring at it whenever you walked ahead of her."

"Maybe she was looking toward the ground. It is dark outside."

Margaret smirked. "It wasn't dark inside the restaurant as the host led us to our table. I swear at one point she almost ran into a chair."

"Oh please."

"Reg, I know a booty inspection when I see one and Emma was quite thorough with yours. Hand to God she even licked her lips."

"You're crazy." Despite her response Regina wanted to smack herself for allowing hope to leak through.

"I'm observant. As a teacher I notice everything. I could spot a student trying to sneak a text message with my back turned to them." Asked if they could change the subject she shrugged, threw an arm low around Regina's back and leaned in to kiss her cheek. "I'll stop but just want to conclude that woman is so into you and the feeling is mutual. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there." Her smile returned she gave the other woman a squeeze. "Besides it's not like you're getting any younger, birthday girl. If a flower is growing amongst your weeds you'd best pluck it and put it in a vase." A grin split her lips, persisting even after a hand smacked the back of her head.

*********

Showered and dressed in slightly baggy sweatpants and a T-shirt, Emma sat upon the bed, the remote in her hand as she flicked through the channel lineup. Truth be told she wasn't paying any attention to what was on the screen as she was much more interested in the closed bathroom door, ears perked for the knob to turn. Eight minutes ago the shower turned off so by now her roommate should be dressed. Or maybe she was still in her underwear seated on the side of the tub moisturizing.

An image of scented lotion smoothed along a bronzed thigh entered her head until Emma shook it to clear. Of course, all that did was make her slightly dizzy. Remote tossed on the bed she leaned back into the tall, cushioned headboard. She had to get ahold of herself. Otherwise she might freak out and drum up a lame reason why it would be best for her to camp out on the couch.

It was merely Regina-her friend and neighbor. They had slept together before, so this shouldn't be a big deal. A frown settled upon her forehead. Stupid Ruby, planting ideas in her head and causing her to question shit. And Margaret hadn't been much better. Kept staring at them like she anticipated them making out at any minute. Also, Emma could swear Regina's little inquisitive sister had caught her looking at her ass once. She couldn't help it. Anyone with a pulse would have checked out that glorious backside covered by a pair of pants that hugged so well they could have been created just for Regina.

Emma sighed while grabbing the remote to continue channel hopping. Of all the women in the world she had to develop feelings for Henry's mother. How had they even found one another after all those years? What were the odds they would both end up living in a different town within New Jersey _and_ be neighbors? It was both insane and surreal yet if she could wave a magic wand and change it would she? Would she give up this feeling she had never before experienced? Was it worth the complication? Even after only knowing her a few months Emma could honestly say that she was unable to imagine her life without Regina.

And yet...there wasn't any way this could work with the history between them Regina remained unaware. And if Emma told her? Sadness suffusing her face she shook her head. That would be it. Regina would most likely never speak to her again and frankly Emma wouldn't blame her.

"You're thinking quite loud."

Relieved she hadn't been on the edge of the bed, otherwise she may have smashed into the night stand when she jumped Emma looked up and toward the left where the object of her great affection stood two steps outside the bathroom. Damn, was it hot in the room to her because those cute little leopard print pajama shorts with the black tank top left little to the imagination. And if she focused enough she could view nipples pushing through the top.

_Emma focus on something else! _"Uh...I am?"

Regina nodded and approached the bed, choosing to sit on the side Emma occupied. "Are you okay?"

"No." She hadn't meant to say that. The truth just burst from her mouth without consent. Emma sighed, hurriedly drumming up a reason. "Can't find anything good to watch."

The remote gently pried from her fingers Regina caused the television to darken. Remote slid onto the night stand she stood up without comment and walked around to the other side of the bed snatching up her charging phone. She could feel eyes upon her as her thumb traveled along the screen, tongue tucked into her cheek, expression thoughtful. Finally a smile bloomed as music began to play. Phone returned to the wooden surface Regina returned to Emma's side and offered a hand, palm up.

"Dance with me," she whispered.

Emma rapidly blinked, glancing between her friend's face and the offered hand. "What?"

A tender smile appearing those fingers wiggled. "Please, Emma."

That was all it took for her to abandon the bed and happily walk right into Regina's personal space, arms encircling her waist. Bodies pressed she felt a pair loop around her neck as they began to dance, foreheads touching, eyes closed as the song carried them into their own little perfect world.

One song turned into two, which shortly turned into three with Emma's face tucked into Regina's neck. She didn't know what the smaller woman wore yet she enjoyed every inhale of that divine fragrance. Too soon for her liking track three ended prompting full lips to brush her cheek just before Regina stepped away. Already missing the warmth Emma watched her return to the phone turning off the music.

The covers neatly turned down, Regina climbed into the bed until she reached the middle and sat with her back against the headboard. Feet flat against the mattress and legs spread and bent she patted the space between while looking up at the quizzical blonde. "Park it right here."

Quizzical expression deepening, emerald eyes stared toward the apex of Regina's thighs a couple seconds. "Um, my face?"

Regina managed to both laugh and smirk, shortly shaking her head. "First, I wouldn't be that bold or demanding. Second, I prefer foreplay prior to the main event and third, we need to talk so sit between my legs facing away from me."

Politely bossy was what she would call it and Emma loved it being directed at her. Ordinarly she wouldn't care for someone trying to tell her what to do but from Regina she discovered it pleased her and though she wasn't one for _talking_ she joined her on the bed, twisting her body around and scooting backward until a soft pair of breasts pressed to her upper back. Breath catching for a moment when arms wrapped around her shoulders Emma forced herself to relax, forced the vulnerability to fade. Her eyes briefly shut at the feel of those lips grazing the nape of her neck.

"Talk to me, Emma," a soft voice instructed.

Legs outstretched and fingers linked on her lap, Emma leaned into her. "About what?"

"I asked if you were okay and you promptly said no."

"I couldn't find any-"

"It had nothing to do with your not being able to find interesting programming so talk to me." Regina intentionally softened her voice. "Please." Ten silent seconds went by. When a minute had passed Regina unleashed a deep sigh. "What were you thinking about when I walked in?"

Gentle fingers having begun to trail up and down her arm Emma responded with a whispered, "You."

"What about me?"

Emma pulled in a sharp breath which was slowly expelled. "I don't want to lose you." As though it helped to reveal the contents of her heart she closed her eyes before continuing. "In such a short amount of time you've come to mean so much to me, Regina, and...I'm afraid there's this ticking time bomb that will inevitably explode and I'll lose you like-that'll be it." Eyes popping open and remaining wide she stared ahead, hoping Regina couldn't hear her pounding heart. Too much. She almost slipped and said something that might invite further questions.

"Like?" When she counted to ten and Emma said nothing she decided to make a guess. "Your parents?" Regina watched that head bob without words following. "You want to talk about that?" To date Emma hadn't told her how her parents died. All she knew was that something had happened to them both when she was twelve. Regina assumed a car accident.

Not realizing she had scooted down a bit in order to rest the back of her head on Regina's shoulder Emma kept her eyes shut. "It was toward the end of summer vacation and my parents decided to surprise me with one last super fun thing to do before I went back to school so we set out on a road trip to Disneyworld." Tears pricking her eyes and throat growing tight Emma cleared it several times before she could resume. "But we never made it.

"There was a storm, it was getting dark and we were trying to make it to the next town to get a hotel. But at some point Dad lost control of the car and we drove over a cliff crashing into the lake below. Not fully submerged, but close. Dad was out cold or dead—I never knew for sure—and Mom tried calming me down."

Dampened eyes shut Emma raised her hand, fingertips brushing her forehead. "There was this big gash on her forehead and both of her arms were at odd angles but she focused on me instead of her pain. She was injured and she didn't know if her husband was...gone...she just focused on her child.

Slowly frigid water filled the car yet she never ceased being positive, telling me I was going to be okay. Talked to me about other things in an effort to take my mind off our current situation. Even sang to me and she had such a lovely voice although she'd never admit it." Tears leaked beyond closed lids as warm hands found hers siding over them, their fingers linked. "It didn't work. I was terrified but God bless my mom, she tried." Voice having begun to crack Emma had to pause, relieved Regina waited without comment.

"Even over the storm I heard the ambulance coming and sent a thankful prayer someone had obviously seen the wreck. Mom kept singing. The water grazed her chin and yet she continued with the soothing lyrics. I wanted to help her, pull her into the backseat with me but I couldn't move. The seat belt dug into my skin and I couldn't release it.

"The ambulance was closer, so close and yet the water was about to cover her head. I started screaming and she told me it was okay. She sounded so patient, so confident I almost believed her, but I knew it wouldn't be okay. They didn't have time to get down there. Although a great swimmer-she taught me how when I was five-she wouldn't be capable of holding her breath that long." Eyes springing open Emma unseeingly stared ahead and whispered, "The last thing she told me was that she loved me. Then her head went under along with Dad's, which had been resting on the steering wheel and I started screaming, the water on a mission to collect me next. Didn't stop screaming until rescued and given a sedative. Awoke in a hospital bed and immediately looked around but of course they weren't there." One hand removed from underneath Regina's she scrubbed at a hot, wet face. "Never would be again."

Having begun to softly cry Regina wrapped both arms tight around her, cheek pressed to Emma's as she whispered how sorry she was. "But you know what?" she inquired in a soft voice. "As cliché as it may sound they are with you because they're in your heart and their love for you will persist for an eternity."

She cried. So robust were her tears Regina decided to change their positions and soon both were stretched out on the bed with Emma half atop her, cheek pressed to Regina's chest, tears saturating that black tank top. Arms encircling her, Regina held her tight, at one point a hand slipping underneath her shirt to soothingly stroke the length of her back.

"Is that why you don't swim?" Regina asked minutes after her friend had ceased crying, her fingers having begun to trace tiny patterns along her human pillow's side. On several occasions she had inquired if Emma would like to take a dip in her pool or even soak in her jacuzzi yet she always turned her down.

Emma nodded, a tongue swiping along her lips tasting salt. "Used to love it but...just makes me think of them. Not even crazy about baths."

"You should get back in one day. I could help you. Reintroduce you slowly. One toe at a time."

A small smile found Emma's lips. "Maybe."

Several more minutes passed. "Emma?"

Feeling warm and safe the blonde had begun to drift, but the moment she heard her name alertness returned. "Yes?"

"Why is there a bomb and why is it ticking?"

The guilt returned to weigh upon her shoulders. "What?"

"You mentioned that you didn't want to lose me but you were concerned about the ticking time bomb. Why does this bomb exist for you?"

Her eyes shut tight while she strove for an excuse. "Did Margaret share with you why I went to prison? You've never asked but she immediately did." _Great excuse, Emma. Revealing this couldn't possibly prompt her to ask _why _you assaulted those men._

While nuzzling the top of a golden head Regina nodded. "She did."

"And?"

"Are they the time bombs?"

Emma hoped she hadn't noticed the four second hesitant pause. "Yes." She almost moaning, having to bite down on her bottom lip when short nails traveled along the middle of her back, leisurely heading back and forth. Being asked why proved a successful albeit tense distraction from those pleasure inducing nails. "Because...because they're a strong example of just how violent, how dark I can be and I'm afraid that will push you away. Which I wouldn't blame you," she quickly added. "I like having you around but I'll understand when you go."

"Emma." Such affection wrapped around the enunciation of that name, the fingers upon the middle of her back moved to her head, threading through her hair, soon sinking into her scalp for a gentle massage. "Emma, I adore you and I'm not going anywhere."

Her eyes shut to further savor those fingers. "You don't know that," she spoke in a quiet voice. "You can't tell the future."

Regina spent a few moments contemplating. "Okay. Allow me to modify." She paused to gather the words. "I'm not going anywhere of my own accord."

"You don't know that either."

Although this wasn't even close to being an amusing conversation a light chuckle escaped. "You'll just have to handcuff me to yourself then."

First her eyebrow then Emma raised her head to study her snuggle buddy finding a faint grin planted upon those lips she yearned to scoot up to taste. "So she's not bold or demanding but she might be kinky."

Regina matched that hiked brow with one of her own. "Is that a problem, Miss Swan?"

The way she asked that, the seductive way she _looked_ when she said that almost had Emma squirming underneath their cover. "Um, not at all. I see no problem here." Two fingers appeared under chin pressing until Emma took the hint and climbed a little higher. Those fingers remaining, their eyes shut seconds before their lips met in the most tender kiss. Although it didn't last long, although it didn't deepen both deemed it perfect.

Forehead resting against hers and eyes still closed Emma whispered her name.

"Hm?"

"Happy birthday, sweetheart." Emma couldn't recall ever using that endearment. At least not in a non-sarcastic way, but so effortlessly did it just leave her mouth and she decided it fit perfectly with Regina for she was a sweet person with a good heart and she happened to be capturing Emma's. No. That wasn't entirely accurate. Regardless if she was capable of admitting it aloud or not Regina already possessed her heart.

_Shit._

_What a tangled web I've wove._


	10. Come Back to Me

Leaned against the back wall of the elevator she studied the glowing cheeks and the shit eating grin still settled upon those lips she had been fortunate enough to briefly sample the night prior. Regina looked rather happy, which couldn't have made her happier, and she had the adorable, bossy teacher to thank for it because she had packed a great amount of fun into their first full day in NYC. Throwing an arm around the woman Ruby had teased would be her future sister-in-law, Emma beamed at her observing as it was full fledged returned.

They ate, drank, danced, sightsaw, shopped and even took in a show, yet Regina appeared to have the most fun at the rage room. She and Regina had never heard of it, but Margaret and Ruby had experience. Basically you pay to break various objects within a room while music played through a speaker system.

Though at first she seemed apprehensive about her sister's idea Regina soon warmed up to it, wielding and swinging a baseball bat like a wrecking professional. Although she enjoyed watching her unleash aggression throughout that room Emma wondered if that was just a sample of what Regina might do to her if she were ever to discover her link to Henry.

Ruby checked her watch as the elevator stopped and dinged on their floor. "So what are we doing now? Twister?"

The quartet exited the elevator while laughing. "It's almost midnight and this mom of four is pooped so I don't know about you ladies," Margaret pulled the key card from her mini backpack, "but I'm gonna call it a night. Watch a little TV in bed before going to sleep."

"Yeah." Ruby nodded. "No kids here but kinda tired myself. Hey roomie," she lightly smacked Margaret's upper arm, "why don't we raid that thousand dollar snack bar and order a movie? My treat."

Although Margaret wanted to cringe at the idea of a pack of peanuts costing five dollars she nodded, another smile blooming as she looped her arm through the one offered. "Sounds like a great way to end our day, Rubes."

Emma thoughtfully glanced between the pair and Regina. "Are they dating now?" she asked with amusement.

Continuing along the hall Regina laughed. "Maybe. Last I was aware my sister was quite straight but your best friend _is _quite charming."

Snickering, Emma copied the chatting pair a few feet behind them by looping her arm through Regina's, heart melting when offered a wink in response.

*********

"11:53," Regina commented the moment Emma emerged from the bathroom wearing the same bedwear she had the previous night.

Eyebrow rising Emma approached her duffel bag. "Thank you for the time, cuckoo clock." A protruding tongue causing her to chuckle she knelt next to her bag and rummaged around until she located the greeting card, Regina's name written across it in all caps. The sealed purple envelope tapped against her thigh she curiously gazed toward the other woman. "So, why are we telling me the time?"

Regina shrugged while trying not to pay that envelope any attention though she was excited to get her hands on it. "Just thought you should know."

"Hm." Emma's eyes narrowed. "So you weren't reminding me that your birthday is over in seven minutes and I've yet to give you a present?" Having chosen to dine in the restaurant on the main floor of the hotel Margaret and Ruby went upstairs to get their presents, which they gave to the birthday girl during appetizers. Emma on the other hand decided not to bring her big box down, much to Margaret's disappointment because she admitted she was nosy and desperately wanted to see what was inside.

A grin flashed across Regina's lips. "Guilty as charged."

"Let me guess. You want me to arrest you and whip out the handcuffs?"

The grin returned. "You said it, not me."

Laughing, Emma stood up and walked up to her offering the envelope. "You'd better hurry. You have four minutes left."

Regina already had half the flap loosened. "What happens if I don't open in time?"

"I walk to the other side of the suite and give your sister your present." The twinkle in her alerting that she merely kidded though she could tell Regina didn't believe her, Emma occupied the space next to her and watched as she pulled the card from the envelope.

Happy Birthday written in a beautiful script was surrounded by trees under an azure sky. A finger traveling across the picture Regina softly smiled. "Apple blossoms."

Not commenting, Emma merely smiled as she watched her open the card. Music beginning to play her breath held while Regina's brow scrunched. It took a few seconds but finally it dawned on her what she was listening to. Glistening eyes switched to Emma, the most wondrous look cloaking her face.

"His favorite song…"

Needing to blink several times for some reason Emma nodded. Not that there was anything wrong with a store bought card but she aimed for something more personal—especially because deep down she figured this would be the only birthday she would be allowed to spend with Regina.

She yearned to make her card count so she created her own card and purchased a sound module, which she added an audio recording of herself playing _A Little Help From My Friends _on Belle's piano. Belle offered more than a little help when she taught her _how_ to play the song, which was no easy feat since previously the only song Emma could play was _Row, Row, Row Your Boat._

A tear trickled as the instrumental version continued to play. "You remembered I told you…"

Actually she remembered Henry told her but Emma just nodded again with a faint smile. Asked where she found it two fingers tapped her chest and if she hadn't been so filled with emotion Emma may have laughed as those dark watery eyes widened.

"_You_ recorded this?"

Okay, a small laugh managed to slip out. "Don't sound _too_ shocked!"

It was Regina's turn to laugh. "Sorry. This is just," she observed her card again, fingers tracing the hand drawn apple blossom frame within just now realizing words filled the frame, "remarkable," she finished in a whisper.

A shoulder offered Regina's a light bump. "Why don't you read what I wrote?" Emma suggested in a near whisper. Suddenly she yearned for a reason to bolt from the room. She had to use the bathroom, go fill their ice bucket, power walk to the other side of the suite to tell Ruby something…

A hand curling around hers and holding it tight prevented movement. Actually, it wouldn't have taken much to free her hand but Emma didn't want to. She had decided weeks ago that Regina's touch was something she now craved. In fact, it may have zoomed to the top of her 'Things Emma Craves' list. So despite being nervous seated there while her friend read that's precisely what she did, grateful Regina chose to silently ingest the words written in her neatest penmanship.

_Dearest Regina,_

_Thank you. It's your birthday and yet I feel as though I'm the one who has been given a gift. The gift of you and your friendship. Can't fully express how much it and you mean to me. You're one of the sweetest, kindest and most beautiful (outward and inward) people I've come across._

_I don't deserve you. Not just saying that. Plenty people throw those words out, but it's legit in my case. I truly do not deserve to have you be a part of my life, but intend to cherish every day I'm blessed with a smile, a laugh, a hug from you. You've managed to unlock a part of my heart that I had intentionally put on lockdown long ago. That's frightening and yet at the same time exhilarating._

_Okay, this is a birthday card and it's supposed to be uplifting. Say something uplifting, Emma. Regina, thank you for entering my life and making it so much brighter. If I'm fortunate enough to live fifty more years quite positive within the next five decades I won't come across anyone as special and lovely as you. I hope your special day is an amazing one because you deserve that. You deserve the entire world._

_Always,_

_Emma_

Regina moved the card out of the way just in the nick of time as a tear fell, instead moistening a small spot upon her pajama shorts. She thought it best to put the card aside when several more tears followed, gladdened when a pair of strong arms pulled her closer. Face buried in the side of Emma's neck, she clung to her until she was able to get her emotions under control. Offered a tissue, she quietly thanked her while dabbing at her face, missing when Emma swiped at her own face.

"Okay," Emma spoke after a near minute of silence, "time for your present." She intended to rise when a hand clutched her eyes. Almost hesitantly she met watery, dark eyes.

"Emma," she thickly whispered.

"Yeah?"

Regina squeezed the hand below hers. "I love you." Watching as Emma's mouth immediately opened she released her hand and pressed two fingers to soft lips. "Now I don't know what that means. Been thinking about it but I haven't figured it out yet. Just want you to know that in some capacity you are loved by me. Don't understand why you don't think you deserve but...I love you and I'm grateful we met." Hand dropping to her lap a soft smile emerged. "Maybe we share a key because you also unlocked _my_ heart."

Afraid she might burst into tears any second Emma reminded herself to breathe. In fact, she took and exhaled several breaths until content she would able to keep her tear ducts under control. Part of her wanted to toss those three special words back at Regina while another part wanted to bolt from their bedroom. Regina made it much easier for her to select option two.

"So gimme my present." A grin flashed she wiggled the fingers of both hands. "I've been eyeing that box in the kitchenette. Thank goodness you taped it so well because the temptation to sneak a peek was strong last night while you slept."

Emma chuckled. "All that tape was because of your sister. She seemed way too interested in its contents."

"She _is_ a little nosy."

"A little?" Grinning in response to Regina's laugh she excused herself to go retrieve the box. First taking a little time to compose herself and managing to talk herself out of downing one of those little bottles inside the minibar, Emma grabbed the box wrapped in colorful balloons and confetti paper and returned to the bedroom, kicking the door shut behind her.

Nervous as hell yet trying not to show it Emma placed the box atop the dresser then asked Regina to come open it. However, the moment eager fingers landed on its lid she was stopped, hesitation written all over the blonde's face. "You have a choice! I could give you what's in the box or you could accept what's in my wallet!" Leather wallet snatched from the dresser Emma waved it about while pasting excitement on her face. "Think about it, Regina. Think."

An eyebrow raised Regina stared at her. "What is this? _Deal Or No Deal?_" She tapped the box. "I'll keep the box."

"Are you sure?" Heart threatening an escape from her chest she shook the wallet in the other woman's face. "You wanna hold it?"

That eyebrow hadn't returned to its normal position. Why was she so nervous? What could possibly be in that box? Regina's interest in it quadrupled as she imagined herself ripping into it like a hyper child on Christmas morning. "No thanks. I know what a wallet feels like, Miss Gameshow Host. I'd like to keep my box."

Emma sighed although she was certain that wouldn't work. She wished she had swallowed a few bottles from that minibar now as it occurred to her that she didn't have a clue how Regina would react to the contents of that box. Would she be touched? Would it make her sad? Might she discover a reason to be angry? Would she just plain hate the design?

Quite hesitantly Emma nodded. "Okay," she softly said while dropping her wallet on the dresser, "open it." Did they need ice? Maybe she should go fill the ice bucket? However, the second Regina shared a brilliant smile with her she lost any desire to leave the room. And so she watched on slightly shaky legs as her friend removed five pounds of tape.

Regina chuckled when the lid could finally be lifted. "What's in here? Top secret government documents?" Peering within the box she noticed crumpled newspaper effectively hid whatever her present was. "Oh I see. You're going to teach me how to paper mache? How fun! Best present ever, Emma!"

Although anxiety threatened to swallow her whole Emma managed a chuckle then pointed toward the gift box. "Move the newspaper out the way, smartass. All that is so it wouldn't jostle around."

Instead of replying, Regina followed instruction by tossing ball after crumpled ball out the box until she spotted what appeared to be wood. One hand wrapped around it she tugged finding that it was heavy but not so heavy she couldn't use one hand to remove it from the box. Barely registering as Emma moved the box out of the way, she placed it upon the dresser, mouth immediately falling open as surprised dark eyes scanned the two foot tall sculpture.

A large, flourishing apple tree stood before her, so many apples clinging from its branches it would take her a while to count them all. As beautiful as the tree perfectly carved from wood was, what mostly caught Regina's attention were the wooden people standing near the tree, a basket in front of them partially filled with apples. Although their faces weren't distinct she knew. Beyond a shadow of a doubt Regina knew they represented she and her son during a trip to the favorited orchard they visited every September.

First reaching out to touch various parts of the sculpture shaky hands then flew toward her mouth covering seconds before the dam broke. Pulled into a strong embrace she gripped Emma like a lifeline, face pressed to the front of her T-shirt, saturating it with her tears. Once able to get her emotions at least partially under control she took a small step back, cupped Emma's face noticing the few tears streaking it and leaned in to brush her lips against hers.

"Emma," she whispered, "have I mentioned that I love you?"

Due to the ping pong ball lodged in her throat Emma couldn't speak. Therefore, she did what she deemed the next best thing by encouraging Regina back into her arms, holding her so tight as she shut her eyes to savor this moment in case many more wouldn't follow.

*********

Three things she was aware of upon awakening. It was 3:42 in the morning, her arms were empty and Regina was missing from the bed. Head raised she turned and peered toward the bathroom noticing that it was dark and the door open, therefore, she wasn't emptying her bladder either. Perhaps she went to the kitchenette for a drink. Collapsing onto the bed and flipping onto her back she stared toward the ceiling, two fingers swiping across her lips. Regina's had been so soft, warm and gentle and she would give everything she owned to sample them again.

Emma sighed for the trillionth time after meeting Henry's mother. God, what a colossal mess. Sure she wasn't actively lying to her, but with each passing day, even each passing second she lied by omission and due to that, with each passing day, each passing second, the guilt accumulated. Should she just roll the dice and tell her? Should she keep her mouth shut? Should she leave Regina alone? No. No, it was far too late for that option. Emma didn't believe she could leave Regina alone unless forbid from her life, which she would richly deserve.

Another sigh and she sat up, eyes immediately falling on the outline of the sculpture she couldn't quite make out without proper lighting. Reaching toward the bedside lamp she then studied the gift further. Regina must have cried on and off for the next half hour following its reveal. She also hugged the blonde so much Emma could still detect her scent on her shirt, which suited her just fine. She wished she could bottle that scent.

Curious eyes landed on the closed bedroom door. Where was she? Maybe she should give her some space. Obviously Emma chose not to listen to herself because two seconds later she pushed the covers off and stood up. The kitchenette dark as was the living area she noticed movement through the sheer curtains, which led to the balcony overlooking Central Park. Not wanting to startle her, Emma made sure to cough as she approached and by the time her hand landed on the sliding glass door Regina appeared, the lighting upon the balcony illuminating her smiling face.

Door pushed open she cupped Emma's left cheek, thumb brushing her bottom lip for a moment. "Looking for me?" she asked, a small twinkle in her eyes.

Emma hoped she couldn't detect the heat filling her face. Emma 'Cygnus' Swan was never one to put effort into finding a woman. Until Regina freaking Mills. She had a feeling she would be willing to follow her to the ends of the earth. "Um...maybe."

"Maybe, huh?" The other woman just nodded. "Since you've tracked me down now what?"

Fingertips pressed to her chest she pushed Regina backward, joining her on that balcony. The wrought iron railing which was tall enough to reach the middle of her back greeted it just as a hungry mouth landed upon hers. Lips parted and tongues met for the first time as they wrapped their arms around one another, one hand soon soaring higher so long fingers could sink into thick, dark locks. Moans escalated, Regina's hands slipping under the back of Emma's shirt, shortened nails digging into the flesh of her lower back eliciting an even stronger moan.

As the feverish kiss persisted hands wandered pulling at clothing as though attempting to remove, but save for a wrinkle here and there everything stayed in place. That simply had to change. Unaware they shared the same thought Emma broke the kiss, grabbed her hands and tugged Regina back into the living room.

Brain working well enough to remind her to both close and lock the sliding door she first nudged Regina toward the right then in reverse, her back pressed to a wall. Suddenly grateful for being able to work out during her years in prison, with little effort Emma picked up her, strong legs wrapping around her waist as their mouths reconnected. The moment teeth playfully clenched her bottom lip Emma's hips thrust forward rewarding her with a soft, approving moan.

For several blissful moments they made out against that wall, Regina's fingers buried in her hair, her own cupping and kneading a backside until a sound caused her to tear her lips away and look toward the other bedroom. Although shut she thought she detected a voice. Breathing ragged and heart thumping behind her ribcage she refocused on the beautiful woman whose cheeks appeared rosier than usual and barely resisted the urge to seal their lips again. Instead, she carefully placed her back on her feet.

"We should go back to our room before they come out and start teasing us."

On board with that idea Regina nodded, leaned in to deliver a featherlight kiss to a swollen mouth stained with her lipstick and attempted to step around Emma. However, the blonde had other ideas, a grin emerging in response to the yelp when she tossed Regina over her shoulder. Certain she must have heard a voice that time and thinking they must have heard the sound Regina just made she booked it toward their bedroom as quickly as possible with her petite load. Door shut with her foot she headed toward the bed, a flicker of clumsiness choosing to show as somehow Emma managed to actually trip over her own foot, Regina fortunately landing on the bed instead of the floor.

Mortified and feeling like the queen of incompetent idiots, Emma would have spent every penny she owned if it were possible to rewind the last two minutes. Instead she could only stand there in the present watching as Regina landed sideways toward the middle of the bed on her back, hair messy around her and partially covering her face. Breathing elevated and eyes wide, they looked at one another and it was impossible to decide which started laughing first.

The first to collect herself, Emma slid onto the bed and straddled Regina rather smoothly considering recent events. Hands on either side of her head, she leaned down close enough their noses almost touched and softly smile, being offered one in return. "Hi there," she whispered before lifting her upper body.

Hand raised, Regina cupped a soft cheek. "Hey back at you." Thumb grazing pink lips she gasped when those lips parted, encouraging it within, a warm tongue taking a stroll around it.

"Yo—you…" Voice having cracked on the small word Regina had to clear her throat and start again while Emma's mouth continued laving attention on her digit. "'member that time I walked in on you and Ruby talking in the garage? About your abstinence during...the years you spent away?" Emma nodded without releasing her thumb. "Am I...really your first since...?"

Emma wanted her to be her last. However, right now wasn't the time to contemplate such a weighty opinion so she tucked it away for later. That thumb released she gazed into Regina's eyes. "You are."

She uttered it so softly Regina had to read her lips for the response. "So...just you and lefty for a decade?"

A chuckle emerged. "No, lefty _and _righty have been on vacation for a decade." Those dark beautiful eyes grew so wide Emma almost laughed. "And I should take this opportunity to apologize in advance."

Foregoing sex during her incarceration was one thing but why had she gone so far as to prevent self intimacy? "What for?"

The grin vanished as quickly as it was revealed. "Here's the abridged answer. No sex. No orgasms. Ten years. You're hot and sexy. I may come fast. Like at this point you could probably lick my knee and I'd have an orgasm."

Regina was unable to prevent the laugh. "Understood." Sitting up with Emma remaining atop her, fingers threaded through soft golden locks. Voice softened she added, "We'll just have to work on your stamina." And with that said Regina leaned in to sample that mouth again.

Collapsed to the bed with Emma stretched out on top of her felt so intimate, so perfect and so right. Words failed to describe how much she enjoyed that body weighing her down, Emma's mouth entangled with her own, hands seemingly touching her everywhere at the same time. Such intense stimulation it was almost too much and yet not quite enough.

The clothes needed to go for she desired, they _both _desired, to run eager fingers along the vast hidden inches of skin underneath. Lack of buttons and zippers making it so much easier, one garment after another decorated the floor until both were bare.

Moving to kneel between Regina's legs, Emma gave a slow head shake of rapturous disbelief while two fingers skated along the bottom of Regina's foot, over her toes and northward along her leg. "You're a goddess," those fingers traced the circumference of her knee, "and I wish," shifting inward they drew random patterns upon a soft inner thigh, "to worship," pelvic area grazed, heat attracted those busy digits to drag against already swollen, slick folds, "at your temple."

Regina to shuddered, hips leaving the bed for a second as she grabbed fistfuls of the blanket, the name of the owner of those traveling fingers breathlessly falling from her mouth. When those fingers stroked her length once more, she gasped eyes meeting Emma's and in a trembling whisper demanded she come closer.

Right. Perfect. Incredible. If she had been capable of carrying on a conversation at that moment, those were the words Regina would have used to describe how it felt when Emma slid atop her, their breasts pressed together, belly to belly, smooth legs between hers, gorgeous green eyes gazing into hers as they shared the same air. Emma felt right, perfect and incredible like she had been specifically designed to align her body to Regina's.

Spreading her thighs even further she raised her head just a fraction to capture Emma's lips while short nails raked the length of her back. The strong, lithe body above beginning to shift, hips grinding into her own caused Regina to gasp into her mouth, shortly followed by moaning. God, she wanted her. No, she craved her. To touch her everywhere, to taste every inch of her skin. At some point, Emma had become her drug, yet she hadn't any desire to attend rehab.

A buck of her hips failed to cause Emma to move. If anything, she pressed her into the bed even harder while a velvety tongue continued exploring Regina's mouth. Several more bucks proving unsuccessful, Regina tore her mouth away, quickened breath falling upon damp lips, pleasure rippling throughout when she noticed Emma's breathing had also sped up.

"Get on your back," she murmured. Asked why she softly chuckled. "Because I said so." Regina bucked her hips again then playfully nibbled a bottom lip, nails traveling along that back once more until Emma whimpered, sighed, then smoothly flipped onto her back.

Arms above her head she languidly stretched, intentionally arching her back so her breasts said hello while feeling dark eyes roaming her length. Because her eyes had shut, a surprised though delighted moan escaped the moment a tongue flicked across her nipple.

She yearned to open her eyes to look while at the same time wanting to keep them shut to savor even more. Eyes shut won until that mouth began sucking in earnest, and the moment they opened Emma shuddered to discover those eyes watching her face.

She clutched the back of Regina's head. "Fuck," Emma whispered, "you're exquisite." Within the blink of an eye those lips were upon hers, a smooth, soft body gliding along hers, fingertips causing goosebumps to arise though Emma was far from chilled. Every kiss became more and more heated until she was certain smoke emanated from her head, which was seconds away from exploding.

It had been so long since anyone… Emma instructed herself to calm down, to enjoy, to not take control because she felt more comfortable in that role. Her cheek cupped, a thumb brushed along it as her name was softly spoken.

"Why are you so tense?" When Emma started to disagree Regina shook her head. "Your body is more rigid than a steel pipe." The padding of that thumb stroked parted lips. "Am I doing something wrong?"

"No," Emma breathed. "You're perfect." No additional words immediately forthcoming she wanted to smack herself for the tears springing to her eyes. God, what was wrong with her? Crying? And during sex? That was unheard of. Her eyes closed as a gentle thumb collected a couple falling tears. Asked what was wrong she shook her head, still attempting to gather the required words.

While Regina continued rubbing her cheek it took the better part of a minute for Emma to open her mouth. "My first year in prison," she quietly began, "someone forced me to do...things...so relinquishing control now is difficult."

"Emma."

She spoke the name with such tenderness Emma suspected she might burst into tears. Thankfully, with a couple deep swallows, she was able to lock them away. Sympathy written across Regina's face, she reached up to cup it. "It's okay. That was a long time ago." When the other woman shifted as though she planned to get up Emma quickly wrapped her arms around her, holding her tight. "I'm fine."

Cheek upon her chest Regina listened to a quickened heartbeat while two fingers lightly stroked along Emma's side. Her heart broke for her. It seemed she too had contended with so much misery. "We don't have to do this, baby. I understand if you're not comfortable. We could spend the night talk-" Flipped over with a mouth falling upon hers prevented that sentence from being completed. Kissed so thoroughly, so deeply and with such passion Regina temporarily forgot what they had been discussing.

Once their eyes met a vague smile caused the corners of Emma's lips to twitch. She called her baby. The sentence replaying in her head several times, upon each repetition that vague smile became a little stronger. No one had ever called her baby. Well, no that wasn't entirely accurate. No one had ever called her baby where the endearment caused her insides to turn into mush. She wanted to hear her say it again. Perhaps a dozen more times. God, what was Regina Mills doing to her?

"I don't wanna talk," Emma murmured, nipping a bottom lip.

Regina pulled in a sharp breath. "What do you want?"

"You," she whispered without hesitation. A quick kiss followed by a deep breath Emma returned to her back, their arms touching as they lay side by side. Despite a thumping heart, despite the few ounces of doubt still clinging to her, Emma turned her head gazing into dark eyes while reaching for her hand and linking their fingers. "I want you to...touch me. Anywhere." She deeply swallowed. "Everywhere."

The dampness, the throbbing seemed to double when Regina slid on top of her again, their mouths reconnecting. Before long that mouth left hers beginning to travel along her body placing the most gentle kisses, occasionally taking a playful nip from flushing skin. Moans escalating, Emma grabbed for the cover as she willed herself to let go, to concentrate on that sweet mouth, those delicate fingers and such soft skin pressed to hers.

Lower and lower Regina shifted, a tongue at first hesitant emerging to play, creating haphazard patterns along the insides of creamy thighs. The closer it drew to that intoxicating heat the stronger Emma seemed to moan, body writhing upon the covers. She released a sound akin to a mewl when that tongue bypassed her throbbing core, instead licking along her groin.

"Please," she whispered. _Shit. _Now she was begging. Emma hated that. She hated that until she opened her eyes to witness the most gorgeous, elated smile upon Regina's lips. If that was the type of response given then she would gladly say please a thousand times more. Fortunately, for the time being once was enough as a dark head lowered followed by the swipe of a searing tongue.

Such intimacy. She craved it. Craved that mouth, craved the hands caressing along her skin, just discovered she craved those elated smiles, but most of all she craved Regina Mills in any capacity she could have her, and right then she felt completely blessed while at the same time, guilt lurked in the background. This woman was a gift she had no right to open, yet she had already removed the bow and if allowed to, intended to unwrap the entire present.

"Oh God." The two words reverently escaped Emma's mouth upon two fingers plunging inside, her tight heat wrapped around them as that tongue bathed her engorged bud. As though she had just been broken, Emma repeated those words several times under Regina's perfect manipulations. It was incredible. Too much, yet not quite enough and she was torn between pulling away and pulling the other woman closer.

The desire to bring her closer winning, a hand scrambled for the back of Regina's head, fingers desperately clutching. Breathing erratic, eyes screwed so tight they might require the Jaws of Life to open, hips continuously left the mattress upon each thrust, each flick of that tongue. Moments after Emma recognized the telltale signs of orgasmic emancipation all activity came to a halt when with some effort she scooted away, immediately missing Regina being inside her. Based on her expression the brunette felt the same way.

Despite trembling limbs Emma sat up, thighs parted to allow cool air to greet her throbbing core. Their eyes meeting she chewed her bottom lip while attempting to collect the necessary words. "I...I need you." Not quite what she wanted to say but it was a start.

Remaining on her stomach Regina reached out, fingertips stroking along a dampened inner thigh. "I'm right here," she spoke in a voice huskier than usual, unaware it caused an appreciative shiver to race along her lover's spine. Having to pull away from the softness of that thigh Regina patted the sheet, eyes an even darker shade of brown gazing up at Emma. "Come back to me."

"No." Two seconds after the whispered denial left her lips a tiny grin discovered it regardless of the frown thrown her way. Emma crooked a finger. "_You_ come to _me_." Sat with arms braced behind her, palms pressed to the bed, Emma bent her knees, legs parted, glistening intimacy on display. "Want to feel you. Need to explode _with _you." Their eyes remaining locked teeth sank into her bottom lip again.

No additional explanation necessary, Regina shifted into a seated position before scooting forward until they were connected. Moans almost in tandem, arms braced, hips danced in sensual, synchronized rhythm. Passions mounting and the room thick with blended arousal, each felt the desire to be closer, Emma the first to initiate by grabbing Regina's head and encouraging her forward.

Foreheads dotted with perspiration pressed together, limbs intertwined as they breathed the same air with eyes shut. With bliss on the horizon, mouths met for damp, zealous kisses. Emma strove to hang on desiring them to if not climax concurrently, then within seconds of one another, yet another brush of a swollen clit against hers was all it took to send her over the edge, body convulsing as again and again she reminded the other woman of her name.

Although not quite recovered, she continued grinding into Regina, their slickness making it so simple. A trail of kisses from her mouth, along her jaw and down the side of her neck, a tongue discovered and bathed a rapid pulse point. That tongue drawing a path to an ear once again Emma begged. "Come for me, sweetheart," she whispered. "Please. I need you so much."

And that seemed to be all it took to cause Regina to unravel in her embrace. Fingernails digging almost painfully into Emma's back, she rocked into her, nonsensical words falling from her mouth amongst moans. Holding her so tight, Emma managed to blink away the tears by the time Regina moved to kiss her with the utmost tenderness. Foreheads reconnecting, they caressed random bits of skin while calming down.

Eyes closed, fingers stroked along the back of Emma's neck. "I love you."

Those three words even more tender than the preceding kiss almost caused Emma to burst into tears. Several deep swallows in lieu of speech she held Regina tight, face buried in the side of her neck. So much emotion, so much closeness. Too much. Not enough. Part of her demanded she let her go because that would be in Regina's best interest, while another part said don't you dare lose her because she is the best thing to happen to you. A tear slipping out she hoped Regina would mistake the sudden drop of liquid upon her neck to be sweat.

_God. Regina Mills is going to be the death of me._


	11. F Words

"Been three weeks and some change since her birthday weekend. So...how are things progressing with your _friend_?" Ruby smirked while her best friend rolled her eyes.

Despising the sudden raise in temperature upon her face Emma dipped a brush into the can before continuing to stain the top of the dresser she built for a customer. "We're fine," she murmured.

"Hm." Expression thoughtful Ruby sat upon a stool while looking up toward Emma, shifting her feet so it continuously slid from left to right. 'Just how _fine _are you?"

A groan pushed down Emma focused on her task. "Stop emphasizing f words."

"Is that your way of saying you're _fuck_-"

"Ruby!" Not only didn't she bother to push the glare down, Emma seriously contemplated dipping the brush again only to slap it across the other woman's face. "Don't be so crass." The glare heightened. "And stay out of my business."

She wanted to push it away, yet what Ruby said brought up images from the previous evening. The both of them in bed, no clothes in sight as Regina straddled her riding the store bought appendage while demanding that she fu-ahem. Emma shook her head yet those images were slow to dissipate. Definitely, Regina Mills would play a significant role in ending her life and Emma had come to the realization that she didn't much care. Every minute she was able to spend with Regina with or without clothing would make it worth it.

Selecting an unused paintbrush from a jar, Ruby held it in her right while running the fingers of her left hand through its soft bristles. "Speaking of, what exactly are you doing with your business?"

Brush paused above the dresser Emma stared at her. "It's like you didn't hear what I just said. In one ear and out the other."

Ruby chose to ignore the ineffective response. "Whether you admit it or not, I know you and Regina are dating. It started before then, but during our NYC trip you took it to the next level. So," paintbrush returned to the jar she clapped her hands together while also ignoring the glare that had just returned, "are you going to tell her?"

Paintbrush tossed into the can Emma sighed, deciding not to argue. It wouldn't do any good anyway since Ruby wouldn't have been much more convineed if she caught them in the act. She was correct, she knew that and nothing Emma said to the contrary would do any good. "Tell her what?"

Although Regina should have been at work that early in the day, observant eyes scanned the driveway before returning their attention to Emma. "About Henry," Ruby stated in a quiet voice.

As though those two small words caused her to lose her balance, Emma shakily reached for another stool and dropped into it, Thighs spread and joined hands upon the leather seat she twiddled her thumbs, appearing reflective as she stared at a point over Ruby's shoulder. That was a question she thought about on a daily basis and the answer, once she settled on one was always different.

Some days the answer was a clear, staunch yes. Of course she would tell her because Regina had every right to finally learn what happened to her son and why. It was just a matter of choosing the correct moment to do so. Some days the answer was a hard, unyielding hell no. She couldn't risk losing Regina. There was far too much happiness, too much tranquility when in her presence. Perhaps it was selfish but Emma couldn't take the chance she would wind up (although rightfully) despising her.

Part of Emma wished to take the secret to her grave while another part wanted it revealed because the guilt just might eventually drive her insane. Revealing it wouldn't change anything. Henry would still be gone. Not revealing it Regina would continue living in the dark and to be riddled with unanswered inquiries as to how her only child ended up shot and abandoned in front of a hospital.

Emma sighed. No matter what happened, which path she selected to travel this was a colossal clusterfuck.

A golden head slowly shook, its ponytail swaying. "I don't know, Rubes." Emma read that expression loud and clear. The words 'you poor bastard' were written in a bold font upon her friend's forehead. "What would _you_ do?"

Instead of offering a response Ruby asked another question. "Do you want her to know about that night?"

Those thumbs picked up twiddling speed. "She has a right to," Emma softly replied.

"Do you love her?"

Somber eyes meeting they simply stared, Emma neither confirming or denying the question. A tongue swept across her lips she jumped from the stool, murmured something about needing to finish the dresser and reached for the paintbrush when Ruby beat her to it, moving the can it rested in further away.

Emma sighed. "Ruby, stop—"

"I'll tell her." Noticing her friend's confusion Ruby stood up, back straight, determination settling onto her features as she faced Emma. "I'm the reason we did that. Why we left him there so I'll tell Regina the truth. That it was me. You were in too much shock to make any—" Unprepared for the tight embrace a startled gasp flew from her lips.

"Wha...what's this?" Ruby asked, arms remaining at her sides. "Are you hugging me or attempting to crush my ribs?" The second Emma released her and stepped and she noticed the tears shining in her eyes Ruby figured it was the former. "Emma…why-"

"I can't let you do that." Her voice sounded so thick, like she struggled to hold back a horrendous sob. "Thank you so much for offering, but no, Rubes." Blinking several times, Emma pressed her palms to her upper chest. "_I _am the main one responsible for what happened that night. Know what I remember from you? That you were there for me, giving support and comfort." One hand left her chest to cup Ruby's cheek. "You're the ultimate best friend and I love you."

"God, Em, what's with the sweetness? You have an inoperable brain tumor or something?" It was meant to sound darkly humorous, something to diffuse the anxiety packed into that garage, but it didn't work since neither laughed or even cracked a smile.

"Emma," patting the hand still upon her cheek, Ruby gently pulled it away and sandwiched it between hers, "You do not shoulder the bulk of the responsibility. Killian motherfucking Jones is the one who showed up with wounded pride because he couldn't believe his girlfriend preferred you, a person who was also serious competition for him business wise. _He_ did this. _He _intentionally killed three people-Ariel, Henry and his unborn baby.

"You, me, Mulan and Belle, we covered it up. Mulan and Belle took Ariel...somewhere, and you and I left Henry in front of that hospital, but that...that wasn't your fault. He had just died in your arms, you were in shock and it was my idea to just leave him there and I hate that. It's on me." Voice cracking, Ruby shook her head as her vision blurred. "Believe it or not, not a day passes when I don't think of him."

"I know." Head bobbing, Emma folded her in another tight hug. "I know, Rubes." She glanced over her friend's shoulder toward the driveway, the only sign of life a bird pecking at a crumb. If Regina were to come home then finding them in that position with tears leaking upon their cheeks she wouldn't have a clue what she would say. Once their second embrace ended she tugged a small, blue cloth from her back pocket, which she used to dab at the taller woman's face. Asked if it was clean she lightly chuckled. "Yeah." A brief pause. "For the most part." Ruby's laugh produced a smile.

"You said you loved me," Ruby commented in a singsong voice.

Emma snorted, tucking the cloth back into her pocket. "I did no such thing. You're hallucinating, Lucas."

"Nope, I know what I heard, Swan." As she watched Emma reach for the can containing her paintbrush she realized nothing had been resolved. Would Emma open up to Regina? Deep down did she intend to be buried with this secret? Maybe she should. Would having the full story truly help Regina? Wouldn't it just reopen old wounds? She returned to her stool as Emma walked toward the dresser snapping right back into project mode.

"Emma?" She spoke the name with such softness she didn't think the blonde actually heard her, until her head turned five seconds later, a blend of a curious and nervous expression on her face. "If you love her, and I suspect maybe you do, just...continue with that." A tender smile curved red lips. "Just be there and love her." Her eyes shut the moment a pair of lips delivered a kiss to the middle of her forehead. "I _know _you love _me _'cause you just said it. Love you some Ruby a whole bunch. In fact, you're totally crazy about-" Ruby yelped when a wet brush stroked along her cheek.

*********

Lounging in Emma's bed, still basking in the afterglow nearly an hour later, Regina sent the ceiling a serene smile while replaying their day. Such a lovely Sunday it had been starting with her teaching Emma how to make cream cheese filled strawberry crepes. It took her a while but under Regina's tutelage Emma finally created a perfectly thin, light crepe. Despite having been proud of it she proclaimed that she would make crepes infrequently, because it took far too long. Was Regina's strawberry cream cheese crepe recipe delicious? Absolutely, but Emma planned to stick with pancakes. The boxed variety although her girlfriend had a recipe for those too.

Her girlfriend. The smile upon Regina's face broadened. Even before NYC she wondered what she and Emma were. Pre New York they behaved like a couple who hadn't consummated their relationship, but following the events of her birthday night she wondered if Emma deemed them friends with benefits or something deeper. Today she received her answer when during a trip to the grocery for the items they would need for their picnic basket Emma had casually asked while stood in the bread aisle, _So what does my girlfriend prefer? Wheat or white?_ The answer was wheat but Regina grinned far too much to reply, instead grabbing a loaf of wheat bread, which she dropped into the basket just as soft lips descended on her own.

Having good naturedly argued over who would receive the honor of paying for the groceries they finally reached a compromise. Emma would pay and Regina would be in charge of putting their picnic basket together. They shook on it, yet somehow that handshake morphed into a kiss right there in the frozen foods section.

The trunk of Emma's car loaded with their picnic basket, an empty basket and a blanket they set out on a forty something mile road trip to an apple orchard having planned to stop at a park to eat lunch halfway there; also taking the time for a walk around the park while holding hands involved in chitchat.

Fifteen minutes after arriving at the same orchard she had visited with her son several times, Emma, a grown ass woman, coaxed her into a game of hide and seek. Regina felt foolish running around searching for her _girlfriend_ and she loved every minute of it. Once they had enough frolicking and enough apples filled their basket, they headed home where Regina proceeded to teach Emma how to bake an apple pie from scratch. It was worse, much worse than the crepes and yet despite the abundance of frustration, flour all over her counters and floors and an exasperated Emma who looked ready to chuck the rolling pin across the room, somehow she thoroughly enjoyed herself.

Literally spending the late afternoon early evening chilling with Netflix and snuggling on the couch they then decided to go out for dinner, Emma talking her into ribs though Regina insisted barbecue was much too messy to be eaten in public. Emma delighted in the fact that regardless of the restaurant being crowded her girlfriend started licking her fingers clean after inhaling her second rib.

Much too full to sample the apple pie they had brought over to Emma’s hours prior, they instead sampled one another's lips while shedding clothing and stumbling toward the bedroom. Multiple glorious orgasms (something Regina thought herself incapable of until Emma) later she lay in bed sharing a smile with the ceiling while Emma tended to her bladder.

It seemed so perfect, so right what they had. Regina had long ago given up believing she could feel this way, to be so incredibly enamored with someone and to have them return her feelings. Of course, Emma had yet to tell her she loved her, but that didn't prevent Regina from feeling loved or at least something just around the corner from it. How Emma touched her, gazed into her eyes, tenderly kissed her, small things like hurrying to open a door for her, complimenting an outfit, asking about her day...Regina felt loved and appreciated.

The sound of a door opening breaking her train of thought, she looked toward the approaching nude woman with a smile still in place. Asked what she was smiling about Regina shrugged waiting until Emma slipped in beside her and threw an arm over her middle, lips grazing her cheek. "Just happy I suppose," she whispered, beginning to stroke the tip of her middle finger across the back of the hand curved around her side.

"Hmm." Facing her with cheek pressed to the pillow a soft smile found Emma's mouth. "Not surprised you're happy. Those _were _some bomb ribs." Her arm lightly swatted Emma chuckled. Following ten seconds worth of silence she called the other woman's name.

"Yes?"

"I like barbecue too." As though on a mission to observe her soul Emma deeply stared into dark eyes. "Like _a lot_."

Regina stared back. "Am I the barbecue?" she softly inquired. A nod caused warmth to spread throughout her body. She liked barbecue a lot. Though it wasn't quite an 'I love you' it would do. It was close enough. "Speaking of…" First encouraging her onto her back, Regina shifted about until she straddled Emma's thighs. Hands on either side of her head she smiled down at her. "Some sexy thing has caused me to work up an appetite and now I'd like to taste a slice of your pie."

A grin emerging Emma grasped her hips. "Sweetheart, you may have much more than a slice of my..._pie_."

Regina grinned. "Very thoughtful of you but I was referring to the pie you baked today."

"I'm going to have nightmares about apples."

Despite how serious she appeared and sounded Regina had to laugh, her lover quickly joining in. "Want some? I brought a can of whipped cream over too."

Sitting up with hands remaining on Regina's sides, she selected that lower lip to nibble. "Great," Emma murmured, kissing that same lip, "I'll pretend _you're _apple pie."

Laughing, Regina climbed off her and opened a dresser drawer like she lived there. Unbeknownst to her Emma jubilantly watched as she slid into a loose fit plaid shirt that reached her mid thigh. Enough buttons undone to display a scandalous amount of cleavage she glanced toward the woman seated in bed, legs drawn up, arms around them as she observed.

"Milk?"

"It definitely does _your_ body good."

Regina managed a silly grin and an eye roll concurrently. "Em...ma, would you like some desser—would you like some pie and a glass of milk for dessert?"

Emma obediently nodded then moved to get up. Instructed to say right there she intentionally pouted. "But I want to help!"

"You will be by keeping the bed warm." Blowing her a kiss, which she was dorky and adorable enough to feign catching, Regina began to walk out of the room when a small, square box wrapped in shiny red gift wrap caught her eye. Having been left at Emma's front door it was from her real estate agent, a post-it note attached saying she was sorry she missed her, but she liked to give her clients welcome home gifts, even those who rented. Box snatched up Regina walked toward the end of the bed tossing it, smiling when Emma neatly plucked it from the air. "Check that out. It'll give you something to do while I'm gone."

An eyebrow cocked, interested eyes scanned the standing woman's length. "I'd rather do you."

A grin and a smirk fought for space upon Regina's lips. "You have a one track mind, Miss Swan."

Emma shrugged. "Not my fault you're so damned sexy."

The smirk won. "I'll be back." As she left the room, she felt a pair of ogling eyes, which prompted a grin to accompany her all the way to the kitchen.

Kitchen light switched, without realizing it Regina had begun to whistle as she proceeded to collect what she needed to put their desserts together. Having cooked or assisted in Emma's kitchen many times over the last few months she was aware of where most items were so it didn't take long.

Making a mental note to buy her a pie spatula, Regina grabbed a knife that looked sharp enough to cut up a whole turkey and began carefully dividing the apple pie into six equal slices. Unfortunately, she wasn't quite careful enough as the blade managed to slit the side of her index finger. An expletive whispered, the knife clattered upon the counter before she tugged a couple paper towels from the hanging roll, wrapping the quilted material around an already throbbing digit.

The first aid kit. She remembered seeing it somewhere. Regina scanned the kitchen then held her left hand to her chest while her uninjured hand opened various drawers until it occurred to her that the kit was underneath the sink. That's right. Last week she interrupted Emma while she cleaned her kitchen and watched as she rifled through the cabinet for the bottle of mop solution. The bright red first aid kit had been in the front next to a small stack of unopened sponges.

Kneeling, Regina opened the cabinet and sure enough it remained in the same spot. Plastic box grabbed she stood up and one-handedly managed to open it intending to search for gauze. However, an object peeking out from underneath the assortment of medical supplies caught her attention. Three fingers caught onto and tugged the end of a thin, black rope. Regardless of a red stain saturating a small section of the towel, Regina's finger discomfort faded with every inch of the object revealed. However, as the entire object came into view, her head began to spin and a gasp caught in her lungs.

*********

The unopened box upon her naked lap, Emma curiously eyed it. Why would this Pam woman who she had never met before decide to send her a gift months after she moved into this house? Telling herself not to be so suspicious, Emma began to peel away the wrapping discovering a black box with a matching lid underneath. Lid removed and tossed on the bed, inside lay a couple of silver Baoding balls atop a bed of thick cotton, another Post-It note stuck to them. _Stress balls?_ An eyebrow arched Emma removed the slip of yellow paper.

_Life causing you stress? Take 'em by the balls!_

Confused eyes continuously shifted between the stress balls and the note. _The fuck kind of present is this from a stranger?_ And why would Pam assume she had stress? What did she know about her life except that she had been released from prison? Torn between calling Ruby for the number to contact this woman and just letting it go, Emma tossed the note back into the box and reached for the lid just as movement caught her attention. Looking toward the entrance to her bedroom a smile started to bloom until she caught the odd look upon Regina's face and the paper towel wrapped hand tucked to her body.

"You're bleeding!" Box discarded, Emma leapt from the bed and began to approach, coming to an abrupt halt when Regina held up her uninjured hand, palm facing her.

"Don't come any closer," she murmured. Regina slowly shook her head, eyes roaming the room as though it were unfamiliar. Like this was the first time she stepped foot in there. Dark eyes landing on Emma they regarded her in a similar manner. Head shaking again she glanced toward her covered finger and sighed. "I'm fine." She spoke so softly Emma had to strain to decipher her response. "Just a small cut but," she sighed again, "I'm going home now."

"What?" It was Emma's turn to shake her head. Why was she behaving so strangely? It unnerved Emma that whenever they made eye contact Regina regarded her like a stranger she wasn't quite sure what to make of. "Why would you leave? Let me take care of you." She tried to take Regina's hand but when she flinched backward Emma dropped hers. _What the fuck? _"I have a first-aid—"

"I found it," Regina whispered, glancing toward the open door. "I'm leaving because I feel a migraine coming on."

Before she had the opportunity to censor herself Emma's lips moved. "I don't believe you." She had to force herself not to retreat in response to a sharp glare. Regina hadn't given her that type of look since the day she caught her stealing an apple from her tree.

"_You _don't believe _me_?" A rather short-lived laugh was anything but humorous. "Wow, that's rich, Emma."

Befuddlement plainly written all over her face Emma stared at her. Two minutes ago she donned one of her plaid shirts and playfully left to obtain dessert for them and now...how had her mood switched so drastically? The energy rolling off her was completely different and sent shivers along Emma's spine. "Regina, what's go-"

"I have to go." Brushing passed Emma she hastened to collect her clothing ignoring as the other woman spoke, desperation heightening with every word. Not bothering to put anything on except her shoes she headed toward the door, sharply inhaling with a hand wrapped around her wrist. Roughly pulling it away she looked up at Emma just in time to witness her taking two steps backward. Although she opened her mouth to instruct the blonde not to touch her the words died in her throat, seconds later replaced with a softly uttered goodnight. Emma barely had time to return it before Regina walked out closing the bedroom door behind her.

*********

Though it was difficult, Emma decided to give her enough time to leave before she opened the door. Walking toward the kitchen, as she had been doing for the last ten minutes she wondered what could have happened, what could she have done to upset Regina so much to the point she didn't wish to be touched or even under the same roof.

The kitchen light still on, Emma surveyed the room finding a couple bowls, silverware, the unwrapped apple pie and other items upon the counter. Walking closer she touched the offending knife's handle, a smidgen of Regina's blood upon its blade. Okay, so obviously she had been cutting the pie, accidentally cut herself and reached for paper towels. Then what?

_I have a first aid_

_I found it_

"Fuck."

An invisible light bulb illuminated a gasp shortly pushed from her lips as alarmed eyes dropped to the closed cabinet below the sink. She didn't want to look yet she had to. Lowering to her knees, a trembling hand reached for the door and upon opening it Emma sighed, uncertain whether the sound was born from relief or not. There the first aid kit sat where she had put it months ago. Evidently Regina found the first aid kit in the second bathroom, because if she had opened this one why wouldn't she have left it on the counter along with everything else?

Holding her breath without realizing it, Emma grabbed the box and opened it, dumping its contents on the floor. She had to check. Pushing various equipment out the way, her agitation mounted until she finally gave up. Heart pounding she clutched her thighs and peered toward the ceiling as though she expected it to help her. Of course the ceiling offered zero answers yet that didn't prevent Emma from continuing to stare until her vision became obstructed by tears. Head lowered, chin against her chest and the fingers upon her thighs digging into bared flesh a couple tears slid along a paling face.

"Fuck," Emma softly, achingly spoke. "Fuck me."


	12. A Good Place

She hadn't slept all night and yet she had never felt more awake in her entire life. Showered, dressed and seated upon the couch, Emma paid rapt attention to the clock knowing Regina was due to leave for work in seven minutes. For hours she had been debating if she should go next door, stand in her driveway and implore the woman to speak to her or wait until Regina opened the lines of communication. Waiting sucked yet Emma discovered she was too much of a chickenshit to do the other, so wait she would.

However, almost an hour after peeking from a window watching as her neighbor pulled into the street she did decide to send her a text message asking if her head felt better and wishing for her to have a good day. Spending the majority of her day in the garage Emma threw herself into working on a client's headboard, checking her phone so often she was surprised it didn't need to be charged. Not one. Not one message from Regina, which was unusual. No matter how busy her days at the hospital could be she was quick to respond to her messages, so the fact that she hadn't even bothered to send off a brusque 'thanks' spoke volumes.

_Fuck._ Emma had internally and externally used that word so much today to her mind and ears it had lost a great deal of its vulgarity. An hour before Regina was due to arrive home she closed up shop and hurried inside to take a shower scrubbing from head to toe. Feeling lightheaded once she stepped out of the tub Emma realized she hadn't anything to eat today. Stomach twisted into knots the mere thought of food repulsed her, yet she was aware she had to eat something. She would require fuel for whatever was to come next.

Hair dried and arranged in a careless ponytail, she tugged on a pair of jeans and a hooded pullover then went to the kitchen where she forced a bowl of cereal down her throat followed by a glass of orange juice. Although the lightheadedness had abated Emma still felt a heap of emotional crap coursing through her and it caused a fidgety sensation.

The Baoding balls. She hadn't thought about the peculiar gift since last night but desperate for even a quarter of an ounce of tranquillity she went in search of them, finding them on her dresser. Never having used stress balls they moved slowly within her palm, continuously clinking as they shifted round and round. So far they weren't doing the trick but it was either them or alcohol and Emma knew that wouldn't be wise. She needed to keep a clear head.

Regina was late. Feeling like a supreme stalker, Emma stood at a window with rotating little silver balls in hand gazing toward the unlit house. Sure she didn't always arrive at the same time. Sometimes Regina stopped at the store, picked up takeout for dinner, went to her sister's house…

Oh God. Margaret. The balls temporarily ceased movement. What if she went over there and was telling her everything right in that moment? What _was _everything though? Did Regina know? Had she put it together? Emma snorted. Of course she had. It wouldn't be difficult to link what she found in the first-aid kit to the foreign object around her slain son's neck.

_Fucking hell_. Why had she put it there? Why hadn't she just stashed it deep in a drawer under a pile of clothes in her bedroom like a normal person? Maybe she wanted to get caught. Emma rolled her eyes. Yes, it was totally feasible Regina would cut herself then search for a first aid kit underneath her kitchen sink while she waited naked in bed for pie and more sex.

Waiting. Emma awaited her world to implode with internal knots threatening to choke her from within. This was a nightmare yet unfortunately she was wide awake. Baoding balls carefully arranged on the windowsill so they wouldn't roll off, Emma tugged the phone from her back pocket. Notification window empty she unlocked her phone, thumb hovering above her lover's name. If she pressed it would call her. Heart pounding enough she wouldn't be surprised if she suffered a heart attack a minute from now, Emma wondered if Regina would answer. If she did answer how might she sound? What might she say?

Closing the phone app Emma sighed and leaned against the wall next to her stalking window. She was going to lose her shit. No, scratch that. She was already in the process of losing her shit. Speaking of shit, maybe she should just leave. Pack a bag and hightail it to Ruby's in a bid for asylum. _Like a fucking coward. Woman up, Emma._

Phone clutched in her hand she pushed away from the wall and without further hesitation called Regina. Breath suspended, phone pressed to her ear she was both surprised and alarmed the call was answered following two rings.

"I'll be there in ten minutes, Emma."

Click. That was it. No greeting, no waiting for a response. One emotion after another flitting across her face Emma stared at the phone, call ended. She answered. That was...good. She hadn't sounded angry yet her voice had been devoid of its usual warmth. Not so good though not unexpected. Emma checked the time. What would happen once she arrived? Impossibly, she felt more knots taking hold of her insides as she shuffled toward the couch and plopped down, a loosened hold allowing her phone to slide onto the cushion.

*********

Although she told Emma ten minutes, it took Regina seven to get home. Instead of pulling into her garage she chose to park in the driveway. Ignition cut, clammy hands gripped the steering wheel as she stared straight ahead.

All day Regina had been trying to tell herself that she had it wrong. It wasn't what it looked like but deep down she didn't believe that regardless of how much she yearned to. There had been too much similarity and why would Emma store hers in a first aid kit? It didn't make sense unless that was her hiding place.

What did it mean? Regina was afraid to find out yet she needed to. Seatbelt undone, she reached toward the glove compartment, opened it and pulled out the small, black pouch on top. Having thoroughly examined its contents the night prior, she exited the car, beeped it to lock and crossed over her lawn, which led her directly to Emma's property.

Knocking, she waited with held breath, not releasing until Emma threw open the door, her expression guarded as she took a few seconds to study her visitor from head to toe, including the pouch in her hand. Ordinarily, Emma may have inquired about its contents but that evening she kept her lips pressed together.

"May I come in?"

She sounded so businesslike it caused a pang in Emma's stomach. Still she said nothing, merely nodding and shifting to give Regina greater access. As she walked by dressed in a pair of dark blue scrubs, the top littered with some Disney character whose name she couldn't recall. Catching a whiff of her cologne Emma wondered if it would be the last time she would be fortunate enough to inhale it.

Door shut she turned to face Regina who obviously chose to stand. By now she would usually be curled on the couch unless she brought food, which she would take straight to the kitchen. "I texted you this morning," Emma spoke, voice sounding timid to her own ears.

Hands pushed into the pockets of her pants Regina nodded. "I read it."

"How are you feeling? Your head."

Regina sighed deeply. "My head. Emma, my head is not a good place to be right now." She stared at her. Hard. So hard Emma appeared ready to open that front door again and exit it. Before she could make up her mind Regina withdrew her right hand along with the pouch, which she tossed toward the other woman. She watched Emma study the pouch without opening it. "Before you look in there anything you care to share with me?"

Emma glanced between her and the bag. Were they playing chicken now? Was Regina testing her to ascertain if she would come clean without having to reveal what she already knew or at least suspected? Lips feeling dry, Emma licked them while shifting from foot to foot. This was it. All these months of wondering if and when she should tell her and this was the moment and it wasn't her decision. Emma suddenly wished she had the courage to open up and tell Regina the truth weeks ago. No, further back than that even. Before they slept together, before she had the opportunity to realize how incredible her lips tasted, how soft her skin was.

She weighed the bag in her hand, feeling the small but familiar object inside. No. Objects. Emma surmised she must have put Henry's in there as well. Perhaps spent significant time last night comparing and contrasting them. "It's a ladybug necklace." Those lips were dampened again. "You found it in my first aid kit." She waited but when Regina just continued to stare at her she figured that was her cue to keep going. "I made it just before I met you," Shit, that stare still remained. "Had another one that my dad made for me-a blue one." Emma hated that her voice had started to shake, nerves evident in each syllable, but she couldn't help it for this was the most difficult thing she had ever admitted. "I gave it...put it around Henry's neck when I left him outside the hospital."

She wasn't surprised by the slap. In fact, many times she imagined Regina laying an angry hand on her when she discovered the truth. A sharp sting to her cheek...she deserved that and probably a lot more. However, following the one slap Regina kept her hands to herself. Well, for the time being anyway.

Sadness slipped onto her face as tears welled in her eyes. "Did you...who killed my son?"

The fact that Regina started to ask if she had taken Henry's life pained her more than the slap, but it would have been a valid question. Regina was already eyeing her like someone she had never met. For all she knew Emma could be capable of doing something so heinous. Legs wobbly, Emma indicated the couch asking if they could sit.

"I don't want to sit. I want fucking answers!" Face reddening, twin tears fell, her body shaking with the force of that shouted response.

"Okay," Emma softly spoke. It occurred to her that it was the first time except during bedroom activities she recalled Regina using that word since their apple altercation. "My business rival Killian Jones. He...Henry-I told Henry to go outside when Killian showed up and he listened initially, but then he came back. He saw I was in trouble, so he jumped in front of Killian's gun and…he ended up shooting him.

"I held him as Ruby drove to the hospital. He um…" Tears traveled along Emma's face as painful memories entered her brain, sharp like the events had taken place last week rather than ten years ago. "Henry asked me to tell you he loved you then he...it happened. We didn't want to deal with the police so since he had already died I left him there and decided to give him my necklace. Regina, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner." Regina promptly beginning to cry in earnest Emma managed two steps in her direction before a raised hand stopped her.

"Do not even think of touching me," Regina warned in a low voice, the hard stare having returned. "Don't you ever put your hands on me again."

"I'm sorry." As though she had just been placed under arrest Emma raised both hands in the air, the pouch dangling from her left. "Listen, Regina, I-"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did this Killian Jones want to kill you? Why did he kill my son instead? And what happened afterward? He shot him and just walked out? What about you? Why didn't he finish you off? Why was Henry hanging around you in the first place?" Dark eyes nearly narrowed to slits. "Did you have him working for you? Selling for you?"

Heartbeat thumping in her ears, Emma could feel beads of sweat collecting on various parts of her body. Though she hadn't any previous experience with being on the witness stand this must be a clue as to how it could feel with some hotshot lawyer firing one question after another at you. Regina had just thrown her so many she couldn't possibly remember them all. Just in case having to repeat herself pissed her off and prompted further palm to cheek contact, Emma tried to casually put a couple more feet between them.

She chose to begin with that last question because the mere idea of Regina thinking she had Henry selling drugs caused her stomach to roil. "I met him at a pizza parlor. These boys were bullying him, I noticed so I stepped in and put the fear of God into them. After that I should've left him alone, but I didn't. He seemed so lonely and he was such a sweet kid so I let him in-" Her hands soared into the air again. "Only as a friend though. That's it. Henry never sold so much as a single joint for me and I refused to let him be around whenever myself or the members of my crew engaged in business. He knew about it, but neither witnessed or participated in any capacity and there's no reason you should believe me but that is the God's honest truth."

"Why did your rival want you dead?"

She could have said his animosity was due to her being such a worthy competitor he felt the need to permanently dethrone her, but that wouldn't be the full truth would it? Since Emma just made a silent vow to never again lie to this woman for better or worse she was compelled to share the entire truth. "Killian didn't like that the bulk of his customers had switched to me because I had more quality products, but that wasn't the main reason he showed up on my doorstep that evening."

Emma pulled in a deep breath. "I'd been sleeping with his pregnant girlfriend and I made the asinine mistake to throw it in his face. So he paid me a visit to put a gun in mine." Regina didn't interrupt as she explained the events from that evening from telling Henry to go outside where the crew had gathered to returning home after leaving Henry's body outside the ER entrance.

"So basically my son is dead because you're a whore."

Wincing, Emma wrapped her arms around her stomach like she had just been punched. "I...I wanted to get under his skin so I slept with her."

"Well done, Emma." A sarcastic smile flashing she clapped her hands. "You got under this son of a bitch's skin so much he took the life of an innocent boy who was courageous enough to try to save your pathetic ass!"

She winced again. At that point, Emma would prefer being physically assaulted to the insults regardless of how veracious they were. "You're right," she whispered. "I knew he was crazy and I shouldn't have messed with him. Shouldn't have goaded him. Just didn't think he-"

"Now _you're_ right." Watery eyes glaring an accusing finger pointed in Emma's direction. "You didn't think and because you failed to use your brain I had to bury my son because if it," Regina's voice cracked, hot tears spilling. "My only child is gone and you…all these months you've been lying to me. By saying nothing you lied. By pretending not to know him every time I brought Henry up you lied. You thought making me that apple tree statue assuaged your sins?" When Emma started to speak, tripping over her words Regina bluntly informed her to shut the fuck up.

"How dare you look at me, wrap your arms around me, kiss me, make love to me knowing what you were keeping from me." Storming up to her Regina jabbed a finger toward the middle of her chest. "You're a fucking sociopath and I want nothing more to do with you. Stay away from me or I swear I’ll..." She didn’t finish her thought, instead just spinning on her heel.

Emma could only sorrowfully watch as she headed for the door. There wasn't anything she could say to make this better and she deserved to lose Regina. She never should have stolen time from her in the first place. None of that prevented a sliver of hope when Regina's hand froze upon the knob, deep brown eyes shifting back to her face.

"Why did you go to prison? I know you assaulted two people and Margaret mentioned they deserved it, but...tell me more."

"I went to confront Killian. Wanted to make him pay, to suffer so instead of killing him I cut off his balls and also shot his dirty cop of a brother in the knee. Then I called the police and pretty much told them to come get me."

Lips pursed, Regina gave a short nod. "Okay." Door pulled open she walked out, quietly shutting it in her wake.

Three seconds later, Emma collapsed to the floor, the pouch landing next to her. Three seconds after that she curled into a ball, the tears started to fall, her shoulders violently shaking.


	13. Prison Without Bars

Plenty of sick time stored up she awoke from a restless night's sleep that morning and decided to take a mental health day. Regina sat on the guest bed, hands upon her knees as she studied Henry's flash drive. Year 15. It was the final recording of his and until now she couldn't bring herself to plug it into a computer. Having learned what she did last night she felt compelled to view the contents of that flash drive. If Emma had truly become his friend during that year then she should be mentioned.

A deep breath pulled in then carefully, slowly released she leapt from the bed, snatched the flash drive and left the room. Laptop in her bed Regina arranged the covers around her, back against the headboard. Reaching for the laptop she opened it, inserted the flash drive and waited.

Multiple files popping onto the screen she selected the one with the earliest date, a bittersweet smile erupting upon an image of her son filling the screen.

"_Hey there! As usual I'm your host Henry Mills and is like to welcome you to Year 15. Okay, I'm a little late starting this one because it isn't January but up to this point nothing noteworthy had happened."_

_A brilliant smile for the camera. "So today I met the coolest chick. I mean I think my mom is pretty cool but this one is badassed kinda cool. I was at the pizza place and the idiot brigade started messing with me. All the sudden here comes this blonde goddess to my rescue and by the time she got through with them I wouldn't have been surprised if each and every one of them had pissed their pants! It was great!" Henry laughed while boisterously clapping his hands together once._

"_Afterward she was gonna leave but I knew I couldn't just let her walk outta my life as quickly as she'd come, so I kinda followed her like a stray that had just been fed…"_

Like the other flash drives Year 15 was a mix of recorded videos and audios and written journal entries. Though Henry spoke of her, the girl he was smitten with, his friends and school, most were Emma centric. How cool she was, the advice she gave him such as it being important for him to study hard, how he shouldn't be mad because he didn't think his curfew was late enough because at least he had a mother who cared wanting him home at a decent hour and don't drink or do drugs. Yes, she was a drug dealer but Henry was a smart young man who should choose an alternate, brighter path than she had.

Regina wasn't certain when it happened, but during the video of Henry and Emma performing karaoke at a club she noticed tears streaming down her face. In the video, her son was obviously nervous at the start so Emma came to his rescue the pair commencing to sing _With a Little Help From My Friends _as a duet. She noticed something. The way Emma threw an arm around him, the way she beamed at him throughout the song, the embrace they shared at the conclusion as the audience cheered, Emma closing her eyes as though savoring that moment...she cared for him.

After confronting Emma yesterday she told herself that she hated her, she despised her. Emma, an ex gang leader, an ex drug dealer was the reason her son was gone from this world much too soon. She hadn't loaded it with bullets, she hadn't aimed it, she hadn't pulled the trigger, but her behavior, her selfishness was the reason it had been pulled and not only was Henry dead but a woman and her unborn child.

Obviously Henry had adored Emma, but the friendship between them never should have formed. Regina was grateful she intervened that day at the pizza place, but following the altercation Emma should have walked away. She hadn't any business introducing a fifteen year old to the life she led.

She hated her. She even spoke the words while staring at a photograph of the two of them taken in NYC, but scouring through Henry's flash drive deep down Regina knew it wasn't true. Did she like Emma? No, she genuinely did not like her in that moment and she didn't wish to see or talk with her, but hate? She hated Killian Jones and if there were any justice he was somehow dead and burning in Hell.

As for Emma Swan? She didn't want to be in the same room with her. Breathe the same air as her. Swollen, reddened eyes glanced around the sparse room. She couldn't do this. It was much too close to the deceitful person she had given her heart to. Regina yearned to snatch her heart back no matter how damaged it was and move on. She couldn't live in this house any longer. She couldn't breathe here because the air was now tainted and thick with acrimony. Perhaps she could get in contact with that Pam woman about putting her house on the market.

The thought pushed away for the time being Regina continued studying the contents of the flash drive. She was in the midst of another journal entry when her phone rang. Ringtone immediately noticed she contemplated not answering but then decided she needed someone to talk with. Cell phone grabbed Regina pressed a couple buttons to put her on speakerphone.

"Hey, Maggie."

"Hey!" Her sister responded, sounding bubbly with just that one, tiny word. "Know you're working. Did I catch you at an inopportune time?"

"Nah, I'm just trying to dig a bullet out this guy. Keep talking. If he screams ignore him."

Margaret laughed. "It sounds quiet. You in the break room?"

"In the bed."

"Double shift?"

"At home."

Following a small pause she asked, "You didn't go to work?" If Margaret sounded shocked it was because she actually was. Her sister rarely called off. In fact, she did so infrequently Margaret joked that if she were to break her foot she would hop into work, put on a cast and clock in.

"No." Laptop moved to the side Regina crossed one leg over the other. "Took a mental day. Needed to clear my head."

"What's wrong?"

Regina swallowed around the lump that formed out of nowhere. Where did she start? "Emma knew Henry. She knows how he died." Although her voice sounded robotic to her own ears her heart cracked a little more with each word. "She pissed off a rival drug dealer and when he arrived at her house to retaliate Henry jumped in the way to save her and so he decided to shoot him instead. Emma and her friend drove Henry to the hospital but he died on the way. So," had that lump quadrupled in size because it certainly felt like it, "they left him there."

Regina was surprised her sister failed to immediately respond. She was even further surprised when nearly a full minute went by without comment. Perhaps their connection have been severed. However, a glance at her phone assured her that the line remained open. Margaret always had an answer, a reply for everything so this sudden silence didn't make any sense. Three times Regina called out to her before she detected an intake of breath followed by a cleared throat.

"I knew she looked familiar," Margaret whispered.

"You...recognized Emma?"

"Yes, but I couldn't figure it out so I brushed it off." A sigh soared through the phone. "Until now. It's so clear now. She was at the funeral and I saw her during the part where people were getting up row by row to view Henry," Margaret explained as delicately as possible. She hated recalling that day and knew it had to be a hundred times worse for her sister.

"It wasn't her row's turn, but she had stood up-I think to leave because I never saw her again. Her eyes were bloodshot, face blotchy and damp from tear streaks. Our eyes met and even from the distance between our rows her grief was palpable. And then David said something to me, I turned to him then looked back where she had just stood five seconds ago, but she was gone that quick. I thought maybe she had been a teacher of Henry's who came to pay her respects."

Speaking of tear streaks Regina swiped at her face with the back of her hand. "I finally know," she whispered, voice thickened as she struggled not to burst into sobs, "finally know what happened to my son and why and it's tied into a woman I was on the verge of giving my heart to." That was a lie, which Regina was keenly aware. The word verge could be omitted because she had already freely handed over her heart to Emma.

"My God. I can't believe this… How did you find out? She confessed?"

"Remember that ladybug necklace Henry had on that I'd never seen?"

"I do. We tried tracking it down but couldn't find it being sold anywhere so assumed it had to be homemade. You kept it didn't you?"

"Yes, I've had it all these years. Sunday night found another one—a red one otherwise identical to the blue ladybug necklace hidden in the bottom of Emma's first aid kit."

"God...what did she say?"

"Didn't confront her until the following evening after work. Had to process you know?" A dark head slowly shook. "Couldn't believe it was true. When I brought it to her attention she admitted it. She...she," eyes feeling moist Regina blinked several times in an effort to keep the tears from falling, "she put her necklace around him in front of the ER. Then they...drove away."

Perhaps it was strange but what seemed to be disturbing Regina was the most was that Emma left him there, left him alone. Of course he had passed on, his spirit had already lifted from his body, but still her son had been discarded on the curb by the woman who he adored so much he took a bullet for her. Based on what she read and seen on Henry's flash drive thus far, it was clear Emma adored him too, but she took the coward's way out. As a drug dealer and gang leader she couldn't deal with the police, couldn't deal with the questions, couldn't deal with potentially being locked up so she bolted.

Leaving her precious necklace with Henry didn't change anything, assaulting his murderer and turning herself in—wait. Vaguely, Regina was aware that her sister was speaking to her, but with knitted brow she stared toward the journal entry on the screen, its words unseen.

Emma and who she assumed was Ruby took Henry to the hospital after this son of a bitch Killian Jones shot him while someone tended to getting rid of his girlfriend's body. Everything had been swept under the rug until Emma assaulted not only the son of a bitch but also his badge wielding brother then alerted the police of what she had done, waiting for them to adorn her wrists with cuffs while the two brothers bled and were undoubtedly in pain.

She waited for the police, unlike the night of Henry's death. Surely they learned she was the leader of the Jersey Devils and a lucrative drug dealer. She dealt with the questions and practically threw herself in prison because assaulting a rival was one thing but a police officer? Despite his being dirty he was still an officer and based on what Regina knew they protected their own.

So _was_ Emma Swan a coward? She went to prison because of what happened to Henry yet for the last ten years it seemed she had kept that information to herself. If she spoke to the police that night, if the cover up hadn't occurred surely she wouldn't had been arrested. True, she sold drugs but the deaths of a teenaged boy and a pregnant mother would have taken priority and undoubtedly the police would have focused on Killian Jones and then following the trial where his ass would have been found guilty of three counts of murder someone in prison could have forced _him_ to do things.

Emma Swan wasn't a coward, was she? She had just opted to drive in the wrong direction on her journey to retribution. Certainly she had caused Killian Jones pain, had eviscerated part of his manhood but he wasn't the one who had been locked up for a decade. It appeared as though she punished herself more than she punished him.

Dark, watery eyes widened. Punishment. After starting to figure out the truth Regina told herself that she hadn't really known Emma. She was nothing but a liar and an asshole who first took her son away then ten years later wove her way into her life only to take her heart away, now smashing it into a million pieces. Emma Swan was the prime example of a sociopath. However, that wasn't accurate. Was she a liar? Yes. Was she an asshole? Regina still felt she qualified somewhat, but was she an incurable asshole? No. Did the word sociopath describe her? No. No, actually it didn't.

She still knew Emma-parts of her anyway. And as she sat there in her bed with Margaret on the phone it occurred to her that Emma “Cygnus” Swan had deliberately punished herself for Henry's death. Killian Jones decided to pull the trigger yet instead of seeking his arrest she felt such an incredible amount of guilt she figured out a way to punish herself more than him.

And their meeting, them becoming neighbors hadn't been on purpose. Some invisible force delivered Emma into her life and Regina was now certain the woman hadn't initially known who she was. During the apple debacle she hadn't a clue. It wasn't until Regina brought lasagna over in an effort to make peace had she figured it out. That night. That night Regina emerged from the bathroom and discovered her seated on her bed. Emma had appeared so frazzled and couldn't leave fast enough. She must have seen Henry's photo and put it together.

Emma kept the truth to herself. She could have and should have said something after that night but she hadn't. In her defense she had made an attempt to keep her distance, but already fascinated by her Regina wouldn't leave her alone and so a friendship was planted, grew and then turned into more. And now…

"What a mess," Regina murmured, startled when Margaret spoke again. Blinking she looked toward the phone having forgotten she was on the line. "Sorry, Maggie, can I call you back later?"

"I should come over." Determination entering her voice she added, "I'm on my way."

"Aren't you at school?"

"Yes, but-"

"What're you gonna do? Just get up and walk out of the classroom?"

"I'm on my lunch break. Could pretend something was wrong with my tuna sandwich and now my stomach hurts. Damn David, told him not to keep tuna in a drawer after opening the can."

Regina chuckled, which she was certain that response was meant to achieve, because she knew her brother-in-law while not the best cook possessed enough sense not to store opened tuna in a non-refrigerated location. "Maggie, thank you for the offer, but please complete your day."

"I’ll come over after work."

"I'll call you."

"So that's a no."

Regina sent the phone a soft smile. "I love you, Maggie."

"I love you too." A three second long pause before she added, "What are you going to do? About Emma? Despite burying the truth, I think she cared for him. Don't get me wrong. Part of me would love to smack her around, but I don't think either of us could dole out a punishment worse than what she's done to herself."

Head slowly shaking, a sigh sifted through her lips. "I don't know yet."

The call ending less than a minute later, Regina read another paragraph of the journal entry before her eyes shifted toward the nightstand. Top drawer opened she pulled out the birthday card Emma had given to her, reading through it twice, which brought her grand total rereadings to circa a thousand. One particular sentence stood out to her.

_I truly do not deserve to have you be a part of my life, but intend to cherish every day I'm blessed with a smile, a laugh, a hug from you._

Was Emma Swan a coward? No. At least not in the traditional sense. She was afraid, she was hesitant and as a result made terrible decisions. She was human.

"_I don't want to lose you. In such a short amount of time you've come to mean so much to me, Regina, and...I'm afraid there's this ticking time bomb that will inevitably explode and I'll lose you like-that'll be it."_

I'll lose you like—then the sentence came to an abrupt halt. Regina inquired if she had been talking about her parents but maybe she hadn't. Maybe her son's name had been on the tip of Emma's tongue and at the last second she had been able to snatch it back. As for the ticking time bomb, that had been the truth surrounding Henry's death.

Emma didn't want to lose her. Regina didn't want to lose her either but how could she possibly be kept?

And what was she going to do? For now she would continue scouring Henry's flash drive until she read or watched everything within it.

*********

Although she finished by nightfall, the following day Regina brought the flash drive with her to work using her breaks and lunchtime to replay this or reread that. Upon reaching the end the night prior she burst into tears and managed to cry herself to sleep. The final journal entry...knowing those were the last words she would receive from him felt like losing Henry all over again.

Returned home, she spent a few minutes seated behind her steering wheel in the driveway, studying Emma's house before continuing into the garage. Although she didn't feel hungry, she forced herself to eat a container of yogurt and granola bar, which helped ease the lightheadedness.

A shower taken, she donned a pair of plaid pajama bottoms and a long-sleeved shirt. Regina had barely sat to turn on the television when she stood again, slipped into a pair of sneakers and deciding to brave the chill, headed across the yard to Emma's house. It was only after she knocked, she realized she hadn't planned on what she wanted to say. She just had the urge to come over and say…something. The moment the door opened she pulled in a sharp breath, locked eyes with a startled emerald pair and mentally encouraged her voice box to start working. Unfortunately, her voice box refused to comply so Emma spoke first.

"Hey," she softly started, a hesitant, faint smile appearing. "How are you doing?"

"My son is dead because you bragged to an obviously unstable asshole that you slept with his girlfriend so how do _you_ think I'm doing?" All right, she hadn't meant to say that. Actually, Regina didn't have a clue what she wanted to say. She just knew she had to see Emma. Why? She wasn't certain and now wondered if this had been a terrible idea because standing at her front door spewing further venom was neither healthy or productive. Instead it proved to be exhausting and inevitably just made her feel worse.

Startlement allowing panic to take over, Emma averted her gaze. "I'm so sor-"

"I know you are," Regina softly interrupted. "I know you feel terrible and you regret what happened, but part of me wants to punch you while another part wants to enfold you in a hug because you look about as miserable as I feel."

Emma jabbed a thumb over her shoulder. "Want to come in?"

"No." Feet contradicting her mouth Regina entered then quickly turned to face Emma, beginning to speak once she shut the door. "I don't hate you but I do blame you. Partially." Arms folded against her chest she studied Emma's face. Somber, brow scrunched, eyes alert and roaming as if uncertain where to settle. "I blame Killian Jones most of all, but I place a great deal of blame on myself."

She held up a hand the second Emma began to disagree. "No, it's true. You were in Henry's life for the better part of a year and I didn't have a clue. I should have known, should have figured out that he had become BFF's with a drug selling gang leader.

"I noticed he seemed happier, lighter, which in turn made me happy for him but I neglected to ask enough questions. Worked too much and parented too little. If I had asked more questions, done a thorough investigation he wouldn't have been at your house. He wouldn't have been around you because no matter how much you cared for my son you were surrounded by danger.

"My son, my Henry," voice cracking, tears coursed flushing cheeks as Regina pressed a palm to her upper chest, "is gone sixty, seventy years too soon because we fucked up.

"Look where all of our foolish choices led. He's gone, you got yourself sent to prison for ten years while I placed myself in a prison without bars."

Stepping so close the fronts of their shoes almost touched Regina grabbed fistfuls of Emma's shirt, peered upward and for the first time noticed she too wept. "Henry shouldn't have been in your world. You should have pushed him away." She watched that golden head bob in agreement.

"I'm sorry, Regina," Emma whispered, every syllable trembling. Hands wrapped around the fists against her chest she gently pulled them away before stepping closer, arms spreading to wrap around the other woman. A sudden stinging to her left cheek caused them to immediately drop, eyes widening in shock. It wasn't necessary to look at her in order to ascertain Regina's emotional switch had been flipped back to anger yet look upon her face she did, the ire Emma discovered there causing her to step backward.

"What did I say about you touching me? I don't need you to comfort me, Emma. If you hadn't been such a moron in the first place I would still be a mother instead of the unwitting girlfriend of the woman who got him killed!"

She stabbed a finger towards Emma's face. "You've had weeks. Weeks upon months to tell me the truth and not only did you insist on hiding it, you allowed me to get closer to you, all the while knowing what you unintentionally orchestrated. You made me care for you," an index finger poked the middle of Emma's chest, "you made me look forward to ending my days with you," another poke, "you made me crave your touch and your kisses," that finger became part of fist, which struck in the same area, "you let me give my heart over to you," the other fist joined in, "you made it so easy for me to fucking fall in love with you!"

Although the blows to her chest had begun to ache Emma stood rooted to the spot with arms at her sides accepting each as there wasn't a doubt in her mind she deserved them all. Lips firmly pressed and tears streaming along her face she barely allowed herself to wince.

"I hate you!" In synchronicity those fists struck once more before stilling, knuckles pushing into tender flesh sure to bruise. Head hung Regina sobbed, shoulders shaking. "I hate you for making it so hard to hate you after...after everything." Lifting her head she stared through blurred vision, but even through those tears she deciphered the pain etched on every millimeter of Emma's face. "I hate you because I love you," she brokenly whispered.

"And I love that you loved my son." Fingers uncurled just long enough to clench Emma's shirt again. "Despite everything you loved him...so obvious the way he spoke of you, wrote about you in his journal. He felt loved and cared for by you so I can't regret that happened." Already trembling like a fragile tree during a storm Regina managed to cry even harder while hanging on to Emma as though her life might come to an end if she were to let go. "So tha...thank you...for loving him too."

Heart severing for the both of them despite being aware she wasn't supposed to touch her Emma decided to risk it, ever so slowly raising her arms soon successfully circling Regina. A breath she hadn't realized she had been holding was released when instead of pushing her away, instead of berating her, Regina leaned into Emma, tucking a damp face to her neck. Eyes shut, Emma tightened her hold willing to hold her throughout the night stood by the front door if that was what it took. However, she dutifully followed when Regina stepped out of the embrace, clutched her hand and began to lead her toward the hallway.

Their shoes removed and the covers pulled back without another word passing between them they climbed into bed, shifting until they could spoon, Emma tucked behind her, a hand under her shirt and fingers splayed upon her stomach, lips grazed the nape of her neck. The moment fingers linked with her own Emma experienced a rush of warmth. This moment felt like coming home yet despite how intimate their positions were she wasn't all that certain she had been invited back in. However, she would cherish this closeness with Regina as long as possible.

*********

Stopped at what she was positive had to be the longest red light in history, her fingers drummed along the steering wheel while her thoughts drifted to Regina like they had many times during the day already. She had awakened that morning alone, but wasn't surprised. For one thing her possibly now ex-girlfriend had to get ready for work. For another thing, even if it had been a lazy weekend Emma suspected she still would have awakened solo, the other side of the bed having cooled already.

There was an ache deep in her chest and she detested it. It hurt-emotionally. She actually would have preferred physical pain to this shitastic feeling. One hand abandoning the steering wheel, she touched her chest, wincing as it was sore. Regina's small beating from last night; when she inspected the bruises that morning with the bathroom mirror Emma knew she deserved them. That pain...she could take that pain but the heartache might drive her insane.

How was she to be without her now? Was this it? Truly it? She would deserve that too, yet the idea of never holding Regina again, never kissing her, never making her laugh, never having the opportunity to share multiple little cartons of Chinese food with her while binging on Netflix that hurt like hell. She couldn't wrap her head around that but remained convinced she would deserve it. After so many years of self-punishment Regina Mills introduced happiness to her life, but who was she to accept? She never should have allowed it. She didn't deserve to be happy. Especially with Henry's mother of all people.

Emma groaned, right foot shifting from the brake to the gas pedal when the light finally switched. She would have to move because living next to her would be torture. She made a mental note to call Ruby for the real estate's information to find out what she had to do. Emma remembered signing a lease but she didn't have an issue breaking it no matter how much it ended up costing her.

Thoughts remaining focused on Regina, she pulled into her driveway forty minutes later following the long drive to Trenton to deliver an armoire. Usually Emma didn't offer delivery service but Gary, the guy who wanted an intricate armoire made for his wife's fortieth birthday had been willing to make the trip worth it. If she and Regina weren't currently in such a tense place she would have marched over there and insisted they go out for a large steak dinner. As it was Emma planned on nuking a frozen pizza and collapsing upon the couch with that and an iced cold bottle of beer.

Exiting the truck she couldn't help but to look toward her neighbor's house noticing there didn't seem to be any lights on. So either she wasn't home or perhaps she sat with a migraine. She should go check on her. Emma shook her head, forcing her feet to move toward her own door. No, she wouldn't be in Regina's personal space, in her business, unless she made it clear she wanted her to be.

Mail tossed on the small table next to her door she shrugged out of her jacket and tossed it upon the back of the couch before turning on the light and glancing around like she always did out of habit. Shoes kicked off she stifled a yawn while advancing toward the kitchen, the sound of an incoming text message causing her to halt. Ruby must have sensed she intended to call her.

_Hey girl. What's up?_

Not offering an immediate reply, Emma continued toward the kitchen, feeling along the wall for the lightswitch while observing the screen. The moment she snapped the light on, a sound drew her attention toward the floor and with a furrowed brow Emma watched one of her Baoding balls traveling across the tiled flooring.

How? How was that possible when she hadn't removed them from the windowsill. Emma began to feel sick to her stomach when she caught movement from the corner of her eye and slowly turned her head toward the left, meeting a devilish grin with a mouth set in a grim line. Cautious eyes shifted toward the bound figure sat in front of the stove before returning to the person wielding a shiny silver handgun with a silencer attached at their side.

"I've been wondering where you were," Emma quietly spoke. The very first day she was released from prison his whereabouts had been on her mind and she became so paranoid awaiting an attack she scared the pizza guy half to death. Just as she let her guard down, just as she began to believe she would never have to deal with him again his crazy ass showed up. Subtly as possible one thumb flew across the keys before striking the send button followed by the power button.

_Help_

"Aw, did you miss me, Cunt? That's _so _sweet!" The hand not holding the gun raised he showed her the remaining Baoding ball. "Since you destroyed mine I hope you don't mind if I play with _your _balls." He was the only person in the room to find humor in his statement. Of course the figure seated on the floor was bound and gagged with duct tape so chuckling wouldn't have been an option, though they were far from feeling humorous anyway. The shiny little ball dropped in his jacket pocket he took a couple steps in her direction.

Emma was about to speak when he interrupted, the gun raised and aimed toward her head. Phone snatched from her hand and thrown toward the floor a booted foot struck it until the screen broke. "Welcome home. Your girlfriend and I have been waiting for you."


	14. Who's Gonna Die Tonight

Tossed a pair of handcuffs, which she caught, Emma glanced between them and Killian. Encouraged to put them on an eyebrow raised. "Let her go and I will."

He chuckled, the gun still aimed at her head swaying a bit. "No, no, love. This is not open to discussion. I'm not _suggesting_ you put the cuffs on. I'm _telling_ you to put the fucking cuffs around your wrists."

Although she frowned Emma figured she didn't have much of a choice. Clicking both cuffs into place she stood still as Killian stepped toward her and tested them, making sure they were indeed locked, and extra tight, before he pointed to where he wanted her to sit.

About ten feet between them, Emma sat facing Regina who although looked terrified didn't show any sign she had been crying. How long had the bastard had her? Had she gone to work? Maybe not because she wore the same outfit she had on the night prior.

"I have to admit," Killian began in a conversational tone as he ambled back and forth between the pair, scratching the tip of the silencer against his temple, "this came together so much better than I had expected, ladies. Cyg," the gun pointed down at her for a moment, "I fear none of this would have been possible if Ruby hadn't selected this house for you rent with Pam's help." He laughed. "In fact I was surprised at just how little cash it took to get that dumbass little agent to convince your BFF to choose the house right next to Henry's mother. Guess the housing market ain’t what it used to be.”

The frown she already wore deepened. How long had this son of a bitch been watching her that he knew when she was to be released and that she sought a house to rent? "Pam? You're working with Pam?"

He shook his head. "No, Pam was working _for_ me. First with finding you a place then," Killian removed the Baoding ball from his pocket and tossed it toward the sink where it landed with a loud thump, "delivering my gift. Hey, how did you like my little gift? Balls. Get it? In honor of your cutting off mine, but at least I had the decency to put yours in a nice box. You just threw mine on the floor, poured yourself a glass of my finest alcohol and waited for the police while my brother and I were in agony."

Emma shut her eyes. _Fuck me_. Suddenly her skin felt like it needed a thorough scrubbing. Being in the same room as him caused her to feel itchy and gross. Knowing he had been keeping tabs on her heightened the feeling. "What do you want, Ki-"

"No, no, no. That's enough questions for you. My turn." Killian flashed a grin, his wandering around the room continuing. "You know, for a cunt, you have some pair of balls on you." A finger pointed in Regina's direction without him offering her even the briefest glance. "First you kill her son and now you're fucking her. How did you manage that?" He clucked his tongue. "A pair of balls indeed. Big pair. Didn't need my gift."

A glare replacing the frown Emma recalled the day she took a knife to his crotch. "One of us has to." A firm slap across the face only strengthened her glare. He was aware they had been sleeping together. How? Had he forced the information out of Regina after kidnapping her? Was Pam still on his payroll to stalk them? Was Killian so obsessed he owned a pair of binoculars, which he used while parked outside? The creepiness factor rose by the second. Emma wondered where his brother was. Was he in on this too? So involved was she in her thoughts she didn't initially realize Killian stared at her like he contemplated slapping her again. Or pulling the trigger.

"You are a disrespectful little cunt, you know that?" When five seconds ticked by without Emma saying anything he turned his attention toward Regina. "I noticed there's been some tension between you and your little lover this week. That's such a pity." Killian's gleeful expression belied his words. "Tell me, how much do you know about blondie's past?" Because it would have been impossible for her to answer with duct tape sealing her lips together, Killian walked up to her and without an iota of gentleness ripped the thick tape off Regina's mouth causing her to release a pained groan.

The area around her lips reddened, her tongue peeked out to moisten them. When he repeated his inquiry she did her best not to display her aggravation and hatred. "I know she's an ex gang leader who sold drugs and went to prison for assaulting you and your brother in retaliation for you killing my son." She wasn't certain how but Regina managed to keep her voice neutral.

Having been working on it for the last few minutes, the moment Killian switched back to Emma she resumed rubbing the bound wrists behind her back on the handle attached to the broiler. She didn't have a clue if she was getting anywhere but she at least had to try. Unlike the tape unceremoniously removed from her mouth it wouldn't hurt. Unless this asshole caught her.

"You know anything about her prison life?" Killian asked while staring toward his incensed main target. A quietly uttered 'not much' brought a twisted smile to his lips. "That's all right I suppose because Cyg here doesn't know everything either. Like," he resumed walking, gun tapping along his thigh as he kept his eyes glued to Emma, "Felice Umber." Another grin emerged upon narrowed emeralds meeting his gaze. "Kinda like Pam. A few bucks padded into her commissary account, a few items covertly delivered to her...cheap labor is so easy to find. Oh hey…" the grin broadened, Killian almost dancing in response to his reveal, "Duke. You remember Duke, right Cunt? Your big pink friend? Under Felice's instruction he hung out in your front _and _backyard, didn't he...puppy?"

Memories she desperately wished she could bleach from her brain played despite her objections. Felice and her crew beating her, verbally tormenting her, refusing to let her eat for days at a time, violating her body time and again until one day she snapped and started kicking their asses so severely she had been thrown in the hole for two months. Upon release she made it clear they weren't to screw with her again and it worked. Killian had been behind that too. Emma was beginning to realize this son of a bitch had been pulling the strings belonging to her life since her incarceration. Unbeknownst to her she had played the role of his marionette.

She couldn't help it. She was unable to contain her emotions; like a bottle of carbonated soda vigorously shook moments before its cap was removed, Emma exploded. Cuffed wrists not much of an obstacle, she almost managed to get to her feet when the butt of the gun connected with her nose, a crunching sound audible enough for all three of them to hear. With immense effort Emma didn't howl in pain, but she did groan as the force of the blow caused her slam back onto the floor. She lay on her right side, face throbbing, a warm liquid trickling toward her mouth until the toe of a boot poked her in the lower back, Killian demanding that she shift back to her seated position.

Once she obeyed Killian's face screwed up with ample distaste. "Wipe your bloody nose, Puppy. No one needs to see that. Have some class in front of your lady friend." Two paper towels yanked from a roll sat on the counter Killian didn't use any care when rubbing Emma's nose and mouth while she concentrated on swallowing a scream. She felt sick to her stomach when with each swipe she heard further crunching. Son of a bitch had broken her nose.

Soiled paper tossed on her lap, Killian leaned against a wall and folded his arms while glancing between Regina and Emma. "You should have seen her. Emma was such a good little bitch." A frown developed. "Until she wouldn't play by my rules any longer. Went into the hole as puppy and came out as Jersey Devil Emma Cygnus Swan again."

He shrugged. "I mean I tried, _really_ tried leaning on Felice to resume torturing you in every way possible but she failed. Your fighting back effectively subdued her." The frown deepened while Killian stared at Emma. "What happened to your pathetic “I'll accept anything anyone wants to throw at me” plan because I feel oh so gosh darned guilty?"

Emma didn't really think he sought an answer until he shouted at her and pushed away from the wall. Concerned he would break another body part she quickly spoke. "Couldn't take it anymore." Emma shook a pounding head while attempting to gather the correct words. "The abuse...you must've paid her pretty well because she was damned good at making those initial months in prison feel like the lowest level of Hell." Though she yearned to wipe that grin off his face Emma remained seated.

"You know, Cyg," paused in front of her Killian pulled a small black pouch from his pants pocket, "while I appreciate you kept the events of that night to yourself that revenge you took on my brother and I had a tremendous impact on him. Fucked up his knee so bad he could barely use that leg. His precinct gave him a shitty desk job and a year into your sentence he ate his bloody gun.

"And then there's me." All traces of humor having vanished Killian delivered a glare so powerful Emma felt like she had just been slapped again. Because of what you did to me even with testosterone replacement therapy I can barely...rise to the occasion. And now," pouch tossed toward her lap it landed next to the crumpled paper towels, "time for you to pay up."

Emma suspiciously eyed the pouch not moving to pick it up. "What's in there?"

"You don't even have the decency to tell me you're sorry for my loss."

Was he fucking serious? Based on her expression it was obvious what Emma was thinking. "That's because I'm not," she was quick to respond, her tone matter of fact. "Don't give a flying fuck that your shitty brother is now worm food."

She realized she should have kept her lips sealed when instead of taking it out on her Killian stormed over to Regina. Ignoring Emma's pleas to leave her alone he slammed the gun atop the stove before repeatedly slapping her in the face until her lower lip split. Gun retrieved, Killian knelt to her and again ignoring Emma's pleas now mixed with threats a thumb wiped away a drop of blood. Somehow Regina managed not to recoil when damp lips pressed to her cheek.

"I see how you couldn't help yourself, Cyg." Glancing toward the woman whose anger was apparent despite the swelling around her nose and below her eyes Killian winked. "Quite a little dish this one is. If I could get it up it would've been deep inside her multiple times today while we waited for you to arrive home. Just like I imagine Duke was in you."

Considering that entire remark along with the busted lip increased her desire to kill him Emma forced herself to mentally count to ten. She didn't feel any calmer after but at least she hadn't foolishly lunged. The relief she experienced when he walked away from Regina proved short-lived when he indicated the pouch demanding that she open it, the silencer giving her forehead a couple light taps.

Regardless of the handcuffs Emma was able to get the pouch open, peered within then with a scrunched brow forming extracted a single edge razor blade, carefully holding the dull end between her thumb and forefinger. This was how she was supposed to pay? A quizzical look aimed at Killian who appeared weirdly gleeful again her lips hesitantly parted for speech. Voice so quiet Emma asked what he wanted her to do with the razor.

"We're gonna play a little game I just made up called Who's Gonna Die Tonight. It's simple really. You, as the main contestant, get to choose who loses their life between you and Regina." Emma's heart pounded even faster the moment Killian aimed the gun toward Regina's head keeping it trained on her while he continued talking. "Two options. I could blow her brains out, which would be a shame because she's so damned pretty. This option would spare your life. I'll disappear and you'll never find me. Been quite adept the last ten years pretending I'm a ghost just in case you developed loose lips telling the police I killed that boy and Ariel. _Or_ you could spare Regina's life by slitting your wrists." The grin upon his lips seemed so broad it almost reached his ears. "Once you bleed to death I'll release her and same thing-disappear forever." Arm lowered, Killian curiously stared. "What will it be?"

"Are you out of your fucking mind?"

Instead of punishing her he actually nodded. "Probably. But we’re not talking about me here, we’re talking abut you. Make your choice, cunt. Lose someone I know is special to you, someone whose son is dead because of you and live with it or do me a favor and stop breathing. Shit, maybe choose her though, put the bitch out of her misery, huh?”

Emma had met her share of people both on the outside and behind bars and she could honestly say no one including his torture employee Felice Umber had managed to reach Killian Jones' level of psychoticness. When a full minute passed by without her responding he sighed and made a huge show of tapping the silencer to the clock face of his watch while telling her time was wasting. Emma had sixty seconds to make a decision or he would make one for her. They would both die.

Face covered in worry Regina waited until equally troubled eyes connected with her own. "Emma, don't-"

Killian whirled in the brunette's direction. "Shut the fuck up! This is her decision. She's the contestant so you keep those pretty lips together unless you'd like me to pay your little sister and her adorable family a visit too." The moment Regina lowered her head he smiled. "Good girl." Swiveling in the opposite direction he glanced toward his watch. "Hurry up, Cyg. Time’s almost up. What will it be?' A small key pulled from a pocket he showed it to Emma. "Do we need this or not?"

Instead of offering a verbal response Emma nodded. Tossed the key she freed herself, tossed the key and cuffs toward the floor then reclaimed the razor placing the sharp edge against her left wrist. Although her right hand trembled she pressed into thin skin watching as it began to sever. Despite Killian's warning she heard Regina begging her to stop and it sounded like she had begun to cry but Emma neglected to look up, too focused on her horrific task. She did her best to ignore the pain, to ignore the panic of bright blood beginning to exit from her body. She couldn't protect Henry. She had failed him, but she would be damned if she failed his mother now. She just prayed that Killian was true to his word and would grant Regina her freedom.

Two parallel lines as deep as she could make them Emma shakily passed the razor to her left hand. Two sounds in the background-Killian's low chuckle and Regina's sobbing-and she mostly blocked them both out while working on her right wrist until it came close to matching the lines upon the other wrist. Razor falling from her fingers widened eyes studied the warm, crimson rivulets escaping the wounds as though mesmerized. Along her arms, staining her pants, some drops making it all the way to the tiled flooring along with its crevices.

Slowly, Emma raised her head looking toward Regina noticing her tear tracks and that the small cut on her lip had ceased bleeding. She wished she could wrap her arms around her and whisper in her ear that everything would be okay before placing the most tender kiss on her lips. Right over there in front of the stove she was so close yet at the same time so far away. Because of the asshole whose interest bounced between them like he was a spectator at a fascinating tennis match Emma would never have the opportunity to hold or kiss Regina again. However, she still had her voice.

"Regina," she whispered, a faint smile curving her lips for a moment, "I love you."

"Aw, that's so bloody sweet I think I have a fucking cavity." Rolling his eyes, Killian proceeded to pace while involved in one-sided conversation neither of the women paid much attention to.

Regina couldn't peel her eyes away from Emma who preferred to gaze toward the floor. Her legs crossed, the backs of her wrists rested upon her knees and with every drop spilled Regina felt hope draining from her own body although she could tell the duct tape surrounding her wrists had begun to tear. Even if she could completely free her arms then what would she do? Walking wasn't an option as a thick amount of tape had been wrapped around her ankles. She didn't have a weapon and she didn't possess any fighting skills. As much as she didn't want to wallow in pessimism this didn't look good.

Killian may have walked back and forth a hundred times when he checked his watch then turned to Emma with a sigh. Although she appeared a bit pale, the blood flow seemed to have slowed. Maybe he should have had this showdown in her bathroom. Shoved a bottle of aspirin down her throat and thrown her ass in the filled bathtub.

"Well, this is dreadfully boring. All this time I've wanted to finish you off only to have you sitting there like a sad, bloody sack of potatoes. No worries though. You still won Who's Gonna Die Tonight but," the gun lifted and aimed toward her head, a long finger tucked to its trigger, "I'm gonna put you out of your misery." A pained no screamed from behind him Killian prepared to pull that trigger having added just a bit of pressure when tackled from behind with such velocity he collapsed to the floor, the gun skittering two feet away from his grasp.

In a near daze Emma watched them scuffle upon the floor, both on a mission to grab the gun. She wanted to help her, wished she could move yet she was much too lightheaded. She shook her head to clear the cobwebs but all that did was cause her head to swim more.

They flipped, one on top then the other, each with a hand on the gun. As close as she felt to tumbling over and passing out, Emma thought she heard a door slam somewhere seconds before her chest felt like a match had been struck on it, quick to start a fire. Much like the sack of potatoes Killian previously referenced she dropped to the floor, but not before noticing Regina alone held the gun. She might have smiled if she contained enough energy to do so.

Scrambling backward, butt sliding against the floor, when she noticed Killian prepared to tackle her, without hesitation Regina raised his gun and fired a bullet into his upper thigh, which caused him to lose his balance and slip in the small pool of blood near Emma's left knee, back shortly to make contact with the floor.

It was when she attempted to rise to her feet she remembered that a few layers of duct tape kept them press together. Eyes landing on it, Regina hurriedly scooted forward while keeping an eye on the groaning man just in case he tried to grab her. Razor in hand, she made quick work of cutting through the duct tape before successfully rising.

"That's for Ariel's unborn baby," she murmured, pointing toward the wound on Killian's thigh, blood rushing through the hole created. Dark eyes filled with the utmost determination she pointed the silencer toward his other thigh pulling the trigger again, not even batting an eyelash when the man cried out in pain. "That one is for Ariel." Muzzle traveling over his body, Regina advanced two steps and pulled the trigger causing a bullet to pierce both his shirt and his stomach. "That bullet is for Emma. And this one," stood right over him and though she spotted movement from the corner of her eye she kept her attention on Killian, she trained the gun on his head, "is for my Henry. Who's Gonna Die Tonight? Congratulations because you're the winner. Burn in Hell motherfucker."

A bullet right between his eyes effectively stopped all sound and movement from him. Though light eyes remained open there wasn't a flicker of life behind them. Staring at him for a moment just to make sure, Regina looked toward the entrance to the kitchen.

"Hey."

"Um...hey back at you."


	15. Les Bean

Not fully comprehending what she had just witnessed, Ruby's gaze shifted between Killian's dead body, Emma's hopefully not dead body—it was difficult to tell as she faced away from her—and Regina holding a hot weapon. So that one word reply had been a legit request for help. After sending several messages back asking for details then calling when her best friend neglected to respond only to have the call go unanswered too Ruby decided to pay her a visit. "What happ—"

"We have to get Emma to the hospital." Hurrying toward her, Regina crouched and gently guided the woman onto her back, gasping upon noticing the blood that saturated a portion of her shirt. Raising that shirt sure enough she discovered a bullet wound. She remembered. When she fought Killian for the gun it went off once. So, she had kept him from shooting her in the head in exchange for the both of them to get shot in the chest.

The good news was that Emma was awake, alarmed eyes shifting between the pair. The bad news was she seemed to be struggling for oxygen. "The bullet may have damaged her lung." Regina glanced toward Ruby while reaching for Emma's arms. "You grab her feet. We'll carry her to my car and lay her in the back. I have a medical kit back there. Come on."

Leaving Killian sprawled on the floor they carefully carried the gasping blonde out the house. Regina's car in the garage, Ruby waited outside with Emma while she bolted into the house, found her keys and hurried into the garage, slapping a button on the wall, activating the automatic garage door opener. Within a minute they had Emma arranged in the back with Regina knelt beside her rifling through her medical kit while Ruby put the car in reverse and pulled out having the directions to the hospital Regina worked at plugged into her phone.

Deciding it best to first address the sucking sound stemming from the bullet entry, Regina found a package of dressing with adhesive. Package ripped open she pulled out the dressing quickly and carefully applying it to the bleeding wound about the diameter of a quarter. Grabbing a roll of gauze to tend to the injuries upon her wrists, Regina wrapped it around and round while keeping her eyes on Emma's face for increasing discomfort. She remained alert but it was obvious breathing had become a chore.

Wrists sufficiently wrapped, when Regina turned to place the roll back in the bag something out the window caught her attention. Peering closer she saw it. A police car stopped at the same red light as them. Hurrying to open the window she screamed and waved until the driver noticed and began lowering the window.

"We're on our way to Pommerton Medical where I'm a nurse. I have a severe GSW to the chest back here and I'm concerned it has impacted her lung. She's conscious but she's lost a lot of blood. Would you escort us there so we may bypass all these red lights?" The officer had activated his siren before he even nodded. Telling them to follow, he continued across the intersection with Ruby shortly to shift into his lane in order to tail him.

Regina's relief for how swift they now traveled was short-lived when she detected a sound she disapproved of. With each breath she took there was a crackling sound and Emma began to grow agitated, hands opening and closing at her sides bringing attention to the bluish tinge on her fingers. A swear word murmured, she dove back into the bag, quick to find the manual blood pressure monitor, worry reaching an all time high upon the results. Emma's blood pressure was far too low. She could go into shock any minute.

"What's going on?" Ruby hollered back without removing her concentration from the road.

"Tension pneumothorax."

Ruby did glance over her shoulder then. Though she had never heard of that it sounded horrible. "What's that?"

"Basically," praying that she had one, Regina threw random items out her way, tugging open a pouch here and unzipping a zipper there, "because of where the bullet wound is, it’s comprising her lung. It's collapsed and now air is building up in her chest, which is making it difficult for her to breathe and causing a great amount of pain. So we need to release that trapped air." Sending a thank you to the Heavens when she grabbed the packaged needle with the correct gauge, she placed it on Emma's stomach and grabbed a clammy hand, offering a squeeze. The frightened expression she wore broke Regina's heart though she pasted on a brief smile.

"It's going to be okay, Emma. We're about to improve your breathing then we should arrive at the hospital soon." Regretfully, she released her hand to tear into an alcohol pad packet. Smearing the sanitizing liquid along Emma's upper chest she picked up the decompression needle, unwrapping it. A finger feeling along Emma's rapidly moving torso, she carefully yet quickly as possible searched for the spot the needle was supposed to be inserted. Asked if she had done that before Regina murmured something about never on a real person then issued another prayer, the long needle perpendicularly sinking into a section called the second intercostal space. She considered another prayer answered when she heard a rush of air and almost instantly Emma began to calm down.

Ruby glanced toward them again. "Did it work?"

"Yes," Regina whispered, removing the needle, a catheter remaining inserted until Emma could be provided with a chest tube at the hospital. A chilled hand recaptured, tears brimmed when a swollen, emerald winked at her.

*********

Five days having passed since Killian tortured them, Regina sat at Emma's bedside where she had been most of the time despite Margaret, Ruby and Emma's doctor all encouraging her to take a break. She only left her side once in order to go home and pack a duffel of clothes and toiletries. Not in the correct frame of mind to work, Regina had taken a week off, though a small part of her looked forward to returning to it in a couple of days. It would give her something constructive to do while still remaining close to Emma who had been in and out (mostly out) of consciousness.

Dealing with the police that first night along with the following morning had been exhausting as they had so many questions, a lot of which Regina didn't feel comfortable truthfully answering because if she said too much they might link Henry's death to Killian. That Regina wouldn't mind at all, but the police having that revelation might impact Emma along with certain ex members of her crew who had tampered with evidence by concealing Ariel's body and leaving Henry's outside a hospital.

Might a prosecutor seek charges against them after all these years? Regina wasn't willing to take that chance by explaining what Killian had done. Not like he could be arrested at that point. It brought her a small measure of comfort that he had already paid the ultimate price. As for the real estate agent Pam, she intentionally hadn't mentioned her, leery of what she might share if police showed up at her door.

Despite all the questions, despite sweeping essential information she had under the rug, despite having shot Killian Jones four times, which could have easily been labeled as overkill, it was decided Regina acted in self defense. Days later she remained shocked; during the interrogation there came a point she was certain she would be arrested. If and when she discovered her eldest daughter's arrest, Cora would have a field day.

Although she had spent the majority of the last five days in a deep sleep, Emma's condition was stable, her injuries on the mend, surgeries to repair the damage to her lung, nose and wrists all a success. Regardless of the swollen nose and bruising upon her face Regina still thought her beautiful as she lay in that bed, soft golden hair framing her head. Regardless of everything that had occurred, everything she had learned Regina couldn't help herself. The last five days proved she couldn't keep her distance from Emma because she maintained possession of her heart.

Emma's left hand in hers, her thumb brushed across the aquamarine Japanese characters inked into the base of her digits. The night she inquired about Emma's five tattoos she mentioned the one on her left hand was in honor of a friend who passed away long ago. What she neglected to mention was that those characters spelled out the name Henry. Plenty of time to be on her phone the third day Regina decided to do research on the tattoo, shocked and touched when she figured it out. Since that day she had admired and caressed the Katakana many times, even kissing those fingers once.

"You're here," a voice weakened from lack of use stated.

Thumb paused, Regina sent the hand she seemed so fascinated by a smile then shut her eyes for a moment while thanking God that Emma finally uttered something lucid. Although there had been moments she awakened, any speech she uttered before those two words hadn't made any sense. Head lowered, lips grazed the back of that hand before watering eyes lifted to connect with a weakened thought attentive pair.

"Of course," Regina replied, a couple tears escaping to dampen her upper lip. "Where else would I be?" After a pause she added, "Sort of shot you so I feel obligated." She grinned to let her favorite patient know she was kidding and breathed a relieved sigh when Emma matched that grin.

"I see." She nodded. "Trying to butter me up so I won't sue for all your apples."

Regina gasped. "_All_ of them? You don't think that's excessive?"

"Nope. You shot me then you stabbed me with a giant needle." A faint grin apparent, Emma shut her eyes as their lids felt far too heavy. Something how one could spend so many days sleeping and yet exhaust clung to them. She felt as though she had just finished running a marathon. "Gonna make you bake me a pie too. From scratch."

"Now you're just being greedy. I only shot you once."

Despite the discomfort it caused her chest Emma laughed. Totally worth it. So many thoughts colliding for space in her brain she wanted to thank Regina. Some events were fuzzy but she remembered. She remembered the nurse saving her life, holding her hand, encouraging her to be strong. She didn't deserve her, not by a longshot, yet felt so fortunate that she was there.

Perhaps this was a dream. Perhaps Regina _had_ done the sensible thing and walked away from her. Perhaps she would soon truly awaken to discover the chair next to her bed was cold and empty. However, that hand felt so warm, those fingers so comforting curled around. If Regina Mills were indeed a dream then Emma wished to never again face reality. Just remain in this cozy imaginary place where Regina thought her worthy of attention, delivered sweet kisses to her hand and teased back about apples.

"Regina?"

"Yes?

Struggling against their heaviness Emma opened her eyes and blinked a couple times in order to focus on that beautiful face now streaked with tears. "Thank you," she whispered.

"For?"

Already they began to shut without her consent. Just before sleep staked its claim upon her Emma faintly replied, "You."

*********

Although she realized this wasn't its fault, that didn't prevent Regina from sending the clock a withering glare. Not for the first time she reminded herself a double shift was lucrative, but really in that moment she would gladly shred her paycheck in exchange for being able to collapse atop a comfy bed under a mountain of covers. However, that wouldn't be happening for another two hours and a half freaking hours.

Emptying her third small cup of coffee from the last hour Regina crushed and tossed it into the trash can while feeling like the grumpy dwarf. And Sleepy. However, mostly she just yearned to bitchslap a few people and that damn clock. Why did it insist on passing the time so slowly?

Perhaps the double shift wasn't the only reason she was in such a foul mood. Regina didn't even think it had to do with the fact she was temporarily living with Margaret, David and their kids. Over the last three months Aunt Regina had tripped on her share of toys, had been walked in on while using the bathroom and hadn't been able to sleep in on even a single Sunday, but it wasn't them. She felt grateful to be so close to her loved ones, especially whenever she awakened from a Killian Jones infused nightmare. However, she had begun a casual search to find her own place as she finally felt ready, her weekly therapist in full agreement.

So what truly contributed to her Grumpy like mood? She knew what it was and even admitted it during her last session. She missed her. Missed her like crazy. Sure they kept in contact somewhat but the scattered text messages weren't enough. Regina missed that mischievous smile, the teasing, the flirting, the strong embrace and lips she swore were much sweeter than honey. Her body pillow was now a very poor substitute. It couldn't compare.

"Hey, Regina?"

Grumpy almost rose to the surface yet she managed to swallow it before turning to regard her coworker. Told Bed 8 wanted her, with a slight frown Regina headed over to study the digital board. Just as she had suspected Bed 8 didn't belong to her and she told Mindy as much.

The younger nurse who could have passed for a high school student shrugged. "Yeah, but when I went in there to access the patient they specifically asked for you. So…"

Grumpy Mills rolled her eyes then pointed toward the board. "Please exchange your name for mine and I'll check on this Les Bean."

Approaching the small ER room a couple minutes later, Regina greeted her patient while pulling back the curtain to view them. Shock written all over her face she stood staring, mouth dropping open. Had she entered into a new level of exhaustion or was Les Bean truly Emma Swan?

Wait.

A dark brow lifted. Les Bean. Some of the shock of spotting the beaming blonde laid back in the skinny bed with one ankle crossed over the other and hands casually linked behind her head faded to be immediately replaced with a smirk. Curtain closed to afford greater privacy the smirking nurse approached the bed.

"Les Bean. Cute name, Miss Swan." No wonder her chart had been so sparse with the initial vitals taken perfect.

One corner of her mouth curved into a grin, Emma swung her legs off the bed and sat up. "Miss Swan? We're back to that?"

Noticing she had spread her legs Regina wished to walk between them but forced herself to keep a couple feet worth of distance. "Oh, I'm sorry. Should reference you by your new name, Miss Bean."

The grin spread to the other side of her mouth. "Are we upset?"

"No, but we _are_ confused though. How did you get back here with that fictitious name?"

"I'm very charming, Nurse Mills."

"Really?" Already she could feel the grumpiness fading away, the dwarf named Happy bouncing within. "Is that what you think?" A soft gasp pushed from her lips the moment Emma reached out, grabbed a fistful of her shirt and tugged her forward, their noses almost colliding.

"It's what I _know_," Emma whispered as she released that shirt. Cupping a soft cheek she gazed into those lovely dark pools. "Damn, woman," the padding of her thumb traced a bottom lip, "I have missed you. So much."

Hoping Emma couldn't detect her pounding heart she rested her palms atop the thighs on either side of her. Emma looked so good, all traces of swelling and bruising having disappeared, a previously crooked nose back where it should be. One hand leaving a thigh to capture the one upon her face, she gently pulled it away and unthinkingly pressed her lips to the thin scars etched into its inner wrist. In one of her text messages Emma mentioned wanting to get a ladybug tattoo-one red and one blue- on her wrists to hopefully cover the scars created by the razor blade, but first she would have to wait over a year for them to fully heal.

Kissing her wrist once more Regina softly smiled. How was it her shift wasn't over and yet she suddenly felt like she had arrived home? "I've missed you too. How are you feeling?" She seemed better...lighter. The last time they were face to face there had been a haunted hue to Emma's face that added another crack to her heart. The ordeal with Killian had been horrible for her, yet Emma received the brunt of it. In the beginning, although her physical injuries healed it had been obvious emotionally she had a long, difficult road to traverse.

Emma nodded, returning that smile. "I'm good. Didn't think talking with a professional would help me, but thank you for the suggestion."

"Did your therapist suggest you change your name to Les Bean and pretend to be a patient?"

The blonde laughed. "Nah, I came up with that idea all on my own."

That laugh was catchy. "So what may I do for you?" The second she attempted to step back strong thighs clenched on either side of her and deep down Regina didn't mind one bit.

"Say yes."

"To?"

"Me."

Dark eyes rolled while the fake patient chuckled. "Obviously, but what am I saying yes to you regarding?"

"A date."

"A date?"

She nodded. "Mmhmm, and I'm not talking about those little brown fruits. I'd like to take you out on a date this coming Saturday. So...all I need is for you to say yes. Maggie already gave me her blessing."

Twin brows lifted. "You sought a blessing for a date?"

The seated woman shrugged. "Yeah, I'm very old fashioned that way."

A jubilant laugh escaping, Regina cupped a glowing face. "In that case, how could I possibly say no?"

"You can't. It's impossible; I'm far too charming."

She leaned in, their noses close to making contact. A yes whispered they shared a smile then sealed their future date with a kiss.


End file.
